Let me tell you all a little (okay, a darn long and complicated) story.
Picture it - a hot, sticky, humid day (is there any other kind) in Joisey on a busy, car filled highway. Imagine a confused, befuddled, yet somehow cute and fluffy Chickadee trying to keep her wits about her while navigating the unfamiliar territory of the vast Eastern highway system. To compound the situation, she's driving her mountain-friendly and Colorado Rockies-correct Jeep, only to find that some hoodlum put Jersey plates on it - that once belonged to a stolen Caddy! Oh the injustice! All about her are people honking and screaming at her with strange, almost un-understandable accents. Where is this scared country girl supposed to go? What is she doing here? What on earth do those people mean by those funny hand gestures? As she ventures down the highway from ****, she is suddenly gripped by a hope that lights her from the inside. There was Jif! Sweet, sweet Jif had come to save her from the grips of this man-made ****. Hooray! As the relieved (yet still fluffy and cute) Chickadee waves, Jif slinks, ever so gracefully, down behind her steering wheel. What a time for an attack of the vapors! Fortunately, as she slunk (slinked?) she landed on the brake, so was spared a terribly messy end. Unfortunately, Deb had visited from Georgia only days before and taught Jif how a true Southern woman has vapors in hopes of impressing the French Chef. The timing could not have been worse! The last thing poor, lost Chickadee remembers is seeing paramedics fawing over Jif as they fought over who got to give her mouth-to-mouth recessitation. She tried to offer help, but as she was pulling over a ranting woman pulled up next to her and started chanting, "I'm a meanie, my name's Leenie. Mess with Joisey, I'll break your nosey". She didn't even know that Joisey and nosey don't rhyme! The frantic Chickadee put the Jeep into high gear and got herself to the nearest airport, vowing never to step foot east of the Mississippi again! Unless, of course Peach needs her. Anything for Peach!
And if you all read through that whole story, you've got way to much time on your hands!
Bless your heart! I went thru that a few months ago! I couldn't bear to even guess what size I had gone into - SO - I bought a very big size in size stretchy! Very stretchy! I loved them cause they looked so small but stretched so big! Just in case DH caught sight of them before the package got shoved in the drawer! I couldn't bring myself to wear them (for fear they'd be too small) - want me to send them to you? (they're unused, I swear! ) Besides, a penny saved is a penny wise according to your & Debs hubby's!
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