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Trying Not To Freak Out . . .

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Old 03-01-2014, 03:41 PM   #1
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Unhappy Trying Not To Freak Out . . .

GAAAAAA!!

Alright, this is worrying me; commentary sought. I started on high protein/small portions last Sunday [2/23/14] and got around to weighing on Wednesday. This afternoon, I kinda wanted to see if my scale number had moved a little bit. Well, it did - 1.5 lbs higher.

I don't know if that's fat transferred to muscle or that I'm doing something wrong. We all know that sinking feeling when we decide to weigh, just knowing the number is going to be a bit lower.

This was my mentality today. I immediately rushed to this forum to find out if this is typical of switching from simple carbs/slider foods back to high protein/low carb protocol.

If anyone can share insights, it would be most appreciated. I'm going to vacuum & mop the floors to get my mind OFF THIS!!
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Old 03-01-2014, 06:40 PM   #2
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wait. hold on. breathe. stop. relax.

stay calm.

ok. now. this could be ANYTHING from TOM to basic water retention to too much salt to .... oh who knows. Remember back to the first year or so after your surgery. Think about what you were eating, and how you were eating it [every couple of hours, 70+ grams of protein, whatever it was], and compare it with what you did this week.

also, think about what your goal for THIS WEEK was. Was it to lose weight or was it to - get yourself onto a different eating schedule? or change what you were eating to better quality protein? or pay more attention to whether or not you were experiencing real hunger? or something else?

I'm only saying this because, although the ultimate goal is to lose weight and maintain the loss, there's A HUGE amount of work that goes into it. Zillions of tiny changes that add up, and there's no way anyone can manage to change everything in a week.

I hope you're putting this into your food diary - what your weekly goal was, how it went, and 'oh by the way' what the scale said.

IMO for right this second, the scale isn't nearly as important as the progress you're making to regain control and get back on track.

and just think! your NUT will be SO IMPRESSED with all this information!!! And if she isn't - find another NUT!!!
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Start your day with a smile, and get it over with.
Keeping it off is a hundred decisions a day that help you maintain what you achieved. And that's the hard part. - L Sanders

start: 506 [Sept 2001]
weight at gastric bypass [Jan 29, 2002]: 409
current weight: 225
weight for plastic surgery: 200
final goal: 180

Posts by members, moderators and admins are not medical advice. See your physician before taking advice found on the internet.
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Old 03-02-2014, 12:16 PM   #3
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Wink Thx, JiffyPop!!

Thx for your words of wisdom. You are right, of course.

I really took some time to calm down, focus on projects around the house & other things to take my mind off my obsessive weight thoughts yesterday evening.

You posed some really important questions:

"What was your goal for THIS WEEK?"

1. Was it to lose weight [not entirely].

2. Get yourself onto a different eating schedule? Definitely
3. Change what you were eating to better quality protein? Absolutely
4. Pay more attention to whether or not you were experiencing real hunger? Yep
5. Something else? Trying to reduce the "brain-games" that seem to attack me every time the thought of food selections crossed my mind.

These are some excellent points to ponder over, JiffyPop.

I needed to do some "settling of the mind" last night and did so. Am going to spend some time outside today with the hubby in our fresh country air & see if that doesn't improve my groove. Thx!!
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Old 03-02-2014, 05:43 PM   #4
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Talking

Okay, I think Jiffy is on to something here.

I noticed I've been having some moderate pelvic spasms & pain this p.m. [endometriosis coupled with menopause] and that very likely is a sign of why my weight appears to be a tad elevated and why I have felt so hungry all day.

I'm being vigilant in using my food journal & eating only high protein approved meals & snacks.

With any luck, the hungries will subside in the next 24 hours.

The day should go fast; I'll be distracted a good bit of the morning tomorrow as we have a cow missing and two sections of barbed wire fencing to mend before more bad weather arrives later this week.

Hopefully, me posting things as I go along will not be too irritating to those following along!!

Last edited by The Beekeeper : 03-02-2014 at 05:47 PM.
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Old 03-02-2014, 08:52 PM   #5
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oh honey - i'm talking to you the same way i TRY talk to myself! I finally realized that my personal self-talk was SOOOO destructive and that i'd never talk to a stranger, let alone to someone i cared about, the way i talked to myself.

you used that O word. OBSESSIVE. There's a lot of debate about what's obsessive behavior and what's being careful. After YEARS AND YEARS of self-watching, i've decided that i no longer want to be so focused on what i'm eating or not eating that it interferes with my life [that's one definition of obsessive].

again - one of the reasons i had the surgery. I wanted to be FREE from food obsession. The flip side, though, is that i think ALL OF US have a certain degree of this - always have, and always will. And we end up transferring it to another habit. Shopping, exercise, alcohol, sex, and others.

My personal goal: to stop obsessing about ANYTHING. i've made progress. and that's good, but i'm not free from it, and i'm not sure i ever will be.

it's OK. honest.

Gotta say that i'm REALLY PROUD of you for focusing on all this work. I wish - with all my heart - that everyone who's on a weight loss journey, regardless of how they're doing it, would work on this. It's more important than whether person's had surgery, or is doing low carb, ideal protein, sugar busters, WWl, calorie counting, or whatever.
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Start your day with a smile, and get it over with.
Keeping it off is a hundred decisions a day that help you maintain what you achieved. And that's the hard part. - L Sanders

start: 506 [Sept 2001]
weight at gastric bypass [Jan 29, 2002]: 409
current weight: 225
weight for plastic surgery: 200
final goal: 180

Posts by members, moderators and admins are not medical advice. See your physician before taking advice found on the internet.
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Old 03-04-2014, 08:40 AM   #6
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Beekeeper,
I don't have near the wisdom jiffy pop has already given you. But, from my own experiences on the WL roller coaster is tackling too many "rules" sends me into a tailspin. The biggest tailspin at all is the "s" word. I know we need to use the darn thing.... But it is a horrible is a horrible obsession for me. And I am guessing surgery didn't fix that for me. So, my answer for me is maybe only weighing every other week, and using my clothes as a guide. After all if I am doing what I need to, the scale will have to follow, right?

Also... My opinion also goes w jiffy pops, maybe use the month of March-- to "March forward" w the mentality of doing one thing at a time to get back on track.

I am getting ready to leave Mexico!!!!! I will gab more later.

Tammy
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Old 03-05-2014, 05:06 PM   #7
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Today continues to be a long stressor . . . am 11 days into my "beginning again" life. My food journal is helping and I'm writing down my thoughts & feelings.

The past 48 hours are vexxing, however. My mood has definitely been on a major downturn. It's hard to know if it's my bipolar flaring or not seeing progress with my weight. The impatience is wearing on me. As I hold the fort with my protein intake, my nerves are making me dwell on eating . . . [wait for it] OREOS!!! I think it's the combination of major crunch & sweetness. I did the better alternative of sliced cucumbers & roasted chicken garden salad. Too much time on my hands I think.

Will be looking for another outlet to deal with this state of mind & pray it passes by in the a.m.

More as I have it.
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Old 03-05-2014, 05:30 PM   #8
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It is so hard to be on track and not see progress on the scale. Darn it! I ate perfectly yesterday, where is the proof on the scale? At least that is how I feel about it most days.

Have you ever tried Zentangling? It is a great way for me to keep myself completely occupied and away from thinking about food. It is a way of "doodling"...try googling or youtubing "zentangle" to see if it would be of interest to you. It completely relaxes and focuses my energies and I truly love it. (And I am NOT an artist. When I attempt to draw anything for my students, large guffaws generally erupt.)
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Old 03-05-2014, 06:04 PM   #9
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zentangling??? sounds interesting! and might be even easier than knitting!!!!
__________________
Start your day with a smile, and get it over with.
Keeping it off is a hundred decisions a day that help you maintain what you achieved. And that's the hard part. - L Sanders

start: 506 [Sept 2001]
weight at gastric bypass [Jan 29, 2002]: 409
current weight: 225
weight for plastic surgery: 200
final goal: 180

Posts by members, moderators and admins are not medical advice. See your physician before taking advice found on the internet.
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Old 03-07-2014, 06:00 PM   #10
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It is very relaxing for me. All one needs is a black pen (I use a black sharpie pen), a pencil, a sketch pad, and an internet connection to look up the many patterns. It is structured doodling, where the doodles are repetitive in nature. I get so focused on making the pattern, that time just flies by.
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Old 03-08-2014, 10:13 AM   #11
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Fat doesn't turn into muscle. You need heavy lifting and a surplus of calories to really build muscle. The scale is probably the poorest way to measure getting to goal. How do your clothes fit, are you eating healthy and getting plenty of water, how much energy do you have. Weight loss is not linear, we don't lose every day and what we eat and even weather conditions (think summer) can influence our weight on the scale.
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Old 03-08-2014, 02:20 PM   #12
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Talking

The past week has been one of holding on, focusing on the day's goals & being more gentle with myself. The last part was the hardest by far!!

I've given the scales a little break for the time being. The positive feedback I'm getting from my clothes being more loose is a good enough progress indicator for now.

I've found it is much easier to stay on track if my protein bars are handy so I stocked up this morning. I've also found that a small Wendy's chili with no crackers is a good item to have in the fridge for a food craving because it's so warm, spicy & filling.

I've done a great job in using my food journal and it helps me to stay on track. I should have plenty to review with the nutritionist at the end of the month.

Thx for all the great suggestions and input. It really helps me to stay on message within myself!!
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Old 03-08-2014, 08:54 PM   #13
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you're getting there!!! it's NOT easy!!! but it sounds like you're getting back on track, and most important, getting the head games taken care of.

warm, spicy, filling works for me, too! i've been marinating chicken in yogurt and indian spices [from a boxed mix] and baking it - it really hits the spot!
__________________
Start your day with a smile, and get it over with.
Keeping it off is a hundred decisions a day that help you maintain what you achieved. And that's the hard part. - L Sanders

start: 506 [Sept 2001]
weight at gastric bypass [Jan 29, 2002]: 409
current weight: 225
weight for plastic surgery: 200
final goal: 180

Posts by members, moderators and admins are not medical advice. See your physician before taking advice found on the internet.
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Old 03-11-2014, 04:35 PM   #14
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Default Putting It Out There . . .

The past weekend was a challenge; hunger was off the charts but today is MUCH better. Now, my tummy feels so tiny. Isn't it strange how it changes like that?

So, I wrote a very long, heartfelt post last night but I obviously deleted it by accident. I felt it was important so I'm going to attempt to recreate it now:

After many hardfought years, it's become very apparent to me that my addiction to food was just one form of a potent addictive personality.

I do not write that lightly. I would like to explain what I mean. For YEARS, every time I found myself upset, bored, frustrated, angry or sad I would just eat into oblivion. After my gastric bypass, I was sooo thrilled to have that monster under control. What I did not realize was that my tendency to trend toward addictiveness in other ways would rear it's ugly head.

I'm a lifelong migraine sufferer. Prior to my wls, I took indomethicin [indocin] which really worked great for my migraines. After wls, I could no longer take them due to being an NSAID. My doctor prescribed me something else. Fioricet.

This worked wonderfully for my migraines. The saddest part was that they worked TOO good. They made me feel awesome. No worries, no fear of crowds, euphoric. Uh-oh. The longer I took them, the more detached I became. That went on for over 5 years. It's sooo hard for me to write that.

They also made it to where I was never hungry - at all. Perfect, I thought!!

Wrong. Very wrong. I finally buried that monster in early 2013. That was precisely the same time that my weight regain got underway in earnest.

I share all this for two reasons . . . it helps me to be honest about how I came about regaining some of my wls loss but also in case there is anyone else out there who can identify. When I gave up my eating addiction, there was still a huge hole inside me. Not from the surgery - but within myself.

For me, it was prescription pain meds. For others, it might be alcohol, smoking, street drugs, overspending . . . I have no idea.

I am far from being back at my "fighting weight", but I'm working on it. Some days I do great; others? Not so much. I now try to focus on one day at a time - or often, one hour at the time. When I make small, positive steps I remind myself that it's all the small things that will take me to where I need to be again.

It really is difficult to be so open with this. The only people who know are my husband & my psychiatrist . . . and now, all of you.

It just feels necessary to me to have some honesty with all the struggles that I fight each day. Some days, choices are easy. Today is one of those days & I'm grateful for that!!

Last edited by The Beekeeper : 03-11-2014 at 07:24 PM.
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Old 03-11-2014, 08:43 PM   #15
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a VERY wise man I once knew said this: it's not possible to survive in this world without an addiction of some sort.

personally, i wish it were an addiction to, oh, i dunno, protein? But seriously - LOOK at the self-progress you've made in just a couple of weeks!!!

it's not really about the food... and i'm so proud of you for doing all this hard work. I'm still trying to eat enough protein.... <sigh>
__________________
Start your day with a smile, and get it over with.
Keeping it off is a hundred decisions a day that help you maintain what you achieved. And that's the hard part. - L Sanders

start: 506 [Sept 2001]
weight at gastric bypass [Jan 29, 2002]: 409
current weight: 225
weight for plastic surgery: 200
final goal: 180

Posts by members, moderators and admins are not medical advice. See your physician before taking advice found on the internet.
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