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Old 11-09-2006, 05:44 PM   #1
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Unhappy Why Can't I Do This???

I have 2 sons, one 18 months and one 1 month. So I have some weight to lose from both pregnancies. I actually need to lose more than just the weight I gained being pregnant. After I had my second son I had lost almost all the weight I had gained being pregnant with him, I have 10lbs to go, but I just can't do it! I keep snacking and eating unhealthy things, drinking soda, I mean I just can't keep to it. I really want to lose this weight, I have about 75lbs to lose, but I just can't get in the mind frame. I hate it. I know my husband really wants me to lose some weight because I have gained so much over the last year and a half. He never tells me, but I know he does. And I don't want to be this size anymore. To just get down to the weight I was at before I had my first son would be great. I mean I wasn't skinny but I wasn't fat, just chunky I guess you could say. But anyways, I think what I need is some support. So if anyone has any advise or if this has happened to you and you pulled out of it then let me know how you did it. Anything will help. Thanks for listening to me. And Thanks in advance for any help!!

July 14th:

December 1st Goal:
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Old 11-09-2006, 05:47 PM   #2
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I haven't had any children, so I don't know what it's like to try to lose the baby weight. But what I can tell you is that a support system is very important, and just keep coming back here and asking for help or just read other posts and something will surely ring true with you.

Hang in there - you can do it!
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Old 11-09-2006, 05:49 PM   #3
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It's not that you can't do it ... you just aren't doing it YET!
It's hard to get started. But we can help you here at 3FC. Don't be a stranger! Come here often. Any time you need to make a food or exercise decision ... come here first.
We'll help you. Honest we will.
Don't spend another minute thinking you can't!
... Susan
Eat good food. Move yourself. Lift something.
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Old 11-09-2006, 08:20 PM   #4
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I know how hard it is. My last child is 9 yrs old and I have a hard time passing my belly off as 'baby fat'. I really hope you can find it within yourself because I can tell that you really want to. Sometimes it just takes something to 'click' inside of you. Just stay on the board.

I'm not sure what motivates you but remember this: Eating healthy will also help your children learn healthy habits. I wish I would have known that before. My 12 yr. old is over weight. I'm guessing she gets it from her MaMa? Anyway we are both on the right track as of now -one week and 4 days with no junk food. She has lost 10 lbs and I have lost 7.

Once you make up your mind you can do it.
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Old 11-09-2006, 08:34 PM   #5
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Getting started is the hardest part, in my opinion...although plateaus are pretty bad, too. But once you see the pounds start to come off, it's pretty motivating.

Like Susan said, we're here for you! Come lean on us. We don't bite - at least not too hard.

Perhaps start by analyzing your current routine. I know everyone says to keep a food journal, but I've never been able to do that for more than three days at a time. I just get bored with it. But if you can even do a couple days, or if you don't write it down, just be mindful of things. What are you eating? How much? How often? Are you active at all? At work? At home? Any structured exercise? How much and how often? What kind?

If you wanna get from point A to point B...you gotta figure out where point A is to begin! So stop pressuring yourself for a couple days. Just go into "observation mode". Take note of what you do, what could be done better, what's already good.

For example, when I started, I didn't really do regular deliberate exercise. But I go to school on a large campus, and usually walk between places instead of waiting for the bus; I'm impatient. So that's a bad thing, but balanced with a good thing. Try to find both in your daily life.

Once you know where you are, you can plan for where you're going. One habit at a time! Like, you talk about soda. Start switching to diet. Or perhaps start replacing a few sodas at a time with iced tea or bottled water or juice. Baby steps will still get you there, and they're way easier to stick to than huge leaps.

Again, you can always come to 3FC. We're chock-full of ideas and tips and suggestions and advice. In case you hadn't noticed. *grin*

Wishing you luck!

Mini-Goal: Under 180 by Imbolc!

C25k - one per run!
Week 1: Week 2:
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Old 11-09-2006, 08:42 PM   #6
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I have a one year old and a 3 year old. I know how hard it is.
In the first 6 wks after my son was born I suffered from bad post-partum-depression. I wanted to diet and lose weight, I just couldn't because I was depression eating. Once the post-partum was over I stopped eating everything in sight, but I didn't try to lose anything until about 3 months ago. Do remember though 9 months up, 9 months down. Give yourself time, and please keep coming here. This is the best place for support.
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Old 11-09-2006, 09:27 PM   #7
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Maybe it's just me, but I always cringe when a woman with a young infant is worried about her weight. Four weeks ago, you gave birth to another human being. Are you nursing? Is the baby sleeping? How's the other child handling the newborn? Do you have a job or are you home with the kids? Does your husband help around the house?

All of these variables impact your life at the moment. When I was in your position with a newborn (didn't even have a toddler in the house at the same time), I was lucky to get out of bed and get dressed each day. Most of the time a shower was a pipe dream.

My point is that I wouldn't advise any giant changes right now. Take some baby steps--change an easy thing. For example, switch to diet soda. If you only had one can per day, you'll save 110 calories a day. Try not to bring any junk in the house. Your kids don't need it. You don't need it. If your husband thinks he needs it, he can buy it on the way to work and eat it in the car.

Those two small changes should help. When you are not sleep deprived and when your body have recovered from the work of labor, you'll be in a better place to make more drastic changes.

"It's a sad day when you find out that it's not accident or time or fortune, but yourself that kept things from you."~~Lillian Hellman
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Old 11-10-2006, 02:30 AM   #8
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Hi .... I fall into the same trap as you do. One thing I noticed was you said you are drinking soda. That was the hardest part for me, even switching to diet was hard. I could not quite it or even lessen it by half without freaking out. Here is what I did:

I got out a calender. Every 4 days I would lessen the amount of pop I was allowed to drink by 1/4 of a cup. That doesn't seem like much, and your right .... which is why it worked. I hardly noticed it. So, by the time I cut my cups of pop in half, I was fine with it. I started adding more and more ice, which helped. I got a really nice *smaller* glass so I would be forced to drink just a little less. I stayed that way for about six months, finally not drinking pop. But then, I had one pop at the movies, thinking I would be okay .... and then I was hooked again. So, my advice is when you stop drinking it .... don't drink it ever ever ever again. Now I am weaning myself off of diet pop. At least I am not suffering the calories this time, though.

Good luck

1:240 2:215 3:195
4:175 (out of obese category)
5: 149 (out of overweight category)
6:125! (goal weight)
Starting BMI: 48.1 Current BMI: 44.9
Restart Date: Sunday February 13 / 2010
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Old 11-10-2006, 10:03 AM   #9
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I get the munchies when I don't take my vitamins. It's almost impossible to get all the nutrients you need when cutting calories, unless you take a lot of vitamins per day. Personally, I take around 10-15 pills per day (I've never counted) and if I forget to take them, I get HUNGRY that evening. It's a simple matter of the body needing certain elements to function, and it will do anything it can to try to scrounge them.

Don't short yourself of vital building blocks. You can easily see if you are getting enough vitamins and minerals by logging your food into a computer calorie counting program. That's how I analyze what I'm short on each day.

edit: And I NEVER drink soda or diet soda. Aspartame gives me headaches and normal soda makes my teeth hurt.

height- 5' 5"
age- 43
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Old 11-10-2006, 11:13 AM   #10
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I think Kateful has given you excellent advice. I had an infant, a 2 year old and a 4 year old at the same time and hubbie was working out of town. I know where you are at. Your main focus right now should be taking care of yourself, getting as much rest as your children allow. Take small steps cutting out 1 thing at a time. Maybee when you baby is a couple of months old you could join a gym and hubbie could baby sit a couple nights a week while you go to the gym. A lot of gyms also have in house child care for no extra charge.
Welcome to the forum and congratulations on the new baby.
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Old 11-11-2006, 06:41 PM   #11
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I have to state something here-your baby is only ONE MONTH old! You should not be seriously worrying about weight loss until after your 6 week visit-your body is still healing from childbirth right now-and will be for a couple more months. Trust me, I just had my third in August! There is more to it than just the veginal or c-section healing-your body is changing its blood volume, your hormones are shifting back to un-pregnant levels, your uterus is still slowly shrinking down to its normal size, your organs-which shft position to accomodate the baby late in pregnancy-are returning to their original positions, and your hips/hipbones are shifting back into place.

If you are nursing-there is additional stress going on as your body is converting fat stores and your dietary intake into food for the infant. If you are nursing-do not eat below 1800 calories a day. It takes about 400-600 calories a day to produce milk. So, if you eat 2000 calories a day, then "you" are only keeping about 1500 of that. If you go lower than 1800, it affects your health-AND the food supply for the infant.

What I am saying is-TAKE IT SLOW. You cannot expect to be losing a ton of weight while your body is still going through these changes. Honestly, because of the spacing of your children-your bdy barely recovered from the first pregnancy before it was launched into the second.

Your husband needs to first off, understand that there is more to pregnancy than the big belly and the birth-there are a myriad of changes going on. Your body needs recovery time. Take it easy!!!!

I am not saying to not try and lose weight-but don't expect too much, too soon. Don't push too hard-let it come off slowly. Right now, at one month postpartum-I recommend light walking. If you have not had your 6 week appt. yet, wait until after that to do any more strenuous exercise. Don't try to lose more than a pound or so a week, tops. Take a multi-vitamin daily.

Take care of yourself and those babies-and lose weight slow and steady. I have only lost a few pounds since Saber was born-and he is 3 months old TODAY. I am not worried. I have done this after my other two pregnancies, and I know that for ME, it takes over a year to get back to my prepregnancy shape/size. It just IS. I didn't create a baby and heal from delivery in 3 months-and I am not going to be back to normal in 3 months, either.

Rest is important right now-and you probably are not getting much. When Saber was 1 month old-I was lucky to get in 15-20 minutes of exercise a day.

Just take slow right now, and give your body a chance to recover. You will lose weight if you ease into exercise and eat healthy-but don't expect too much, too soon after birth.

Start weight after baby #3: 233.9
Current weight: 143
90 pounds lost!
Ambriehl Saroj
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Old 11-11-2006, 07:10 PM   #12
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I agree with the Aphil, Kateful, and others that you shouldn't be too worried about weight loss only a month after giving birth.

But if you do want some suggestions, when I have fallen off the wagon and had trouble getting back on, here is what helped me:
  • I stopped buying food that I was having trouble resisting. It's way easier to resist something that isn't there. Eventually, once I got back on program, I was able to start buying some of this food again, but when I was struggling, it was just better not to have it in the house.
  • If there is something in the house that I'm having trouble resisting, I tell myself that if I don't eat it in single servings (and only one serving per day and only if it fits into my calories for the day), I have to throw it out. Every time I think about having just a little more, I tell myself I'm going to have to throw it out. I have thrown food out before, so I know I'll do it, too. That's usually enough to keep me in line.
  • Having someone to be accountable to, someone who will ask me what I ate during the day also helps. In my case, I have a trainer that does this for me. Knowing I'm going to have to tell him what I've eaten helps me make smart decisions. Usually we only have to do this for a few days and I'm back on track. Anyone could do this for you, a friend, maybe your husband, or even just using the planning threads in the Support forum (a couple of people are doing this now for peanut butter and chips, you could join in with them).
- Barbara

My Before and After Pics

"Decide what you want; decide what you're willing to exchange for it; establish your priorities, and go to work." --H.L. Hunt

"Life has hills. Set the treadmill at an incline."
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