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Old 07-11-2006, 10:35 AM   #1
sli
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Question How do you go about it???

I am not sure if this is the right place to post this thread, so if not....Sorry
Here is my question...How do you go about giving the clothes that you have grown out of to someone you know that needs them.
I am only 5 foot so finding clothes that were the right length and waist size (20) was a real pain in the you know what.
Well now I am into a size 14 and I have alot of extra jeans and capris that no longer fit.
So, to make a long story short (because it could get long) she is the same height as I and about the same weight or a little more that I used to be and she always like my stuff and always complained that she could NEVER find the right length, how do I offer someone my old stuff without making them feel bad or think that I am calling her fat???
This person has NOT been real supportive of my weight lose and she doesn't much like herself at the weight that shes at. I really care for this person and I don't want to hurt her feelings...UGH
So, offer them to her or NO.
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Old 07-11-2006, 10:52 AM   #2
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I would offer the clothes if you know she can really use them. Since she is sensitive to your weight loss and been unsupportive, don't say anything about how much weight you've lost or how many sizes you've gone down. Perhaps just casually mention that you were going through your closet and found so clothes you no longer need and were wondering if she would like to have them.
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Old 07-11-2006, 11:05 AM   #3
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With my biggest sizes (18-20), I just didn't feel comfortable handing them out to specific people. Instead, I got a couple of my girlfriends together on a couple of occaisions and seperately on a couple of other occaisions and told them that if they would like to rummage through my 8 garbage bags of clothes, they were more than welcome, otherwise, they were off to Goodwill. Of course they were aware that I couldn't very well wear a size 18 anymore, but free clothes are free clothes. Another motive for them was the fact that they work in offices and I no longer do, so I had a bunch of professional attire left over as well. Another thing I did was give stuff away a piece at a time. For instance, if a friend liked a particular shirt I would remember that and set it aside for her.

Just tell her that you know how hard it is for her to find clothes in the right length and you have some that you just don't have use for. Otherwise, just causually offer up some extra clothes for her to rummage through. With some of my friends, I knew that some items would be too big and others would be too small and it was just easier to let them decide.

I, for one, have never turned down the opportunity to pick and choose free clothes, no matter what the pretense is.
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Old 07-11-2006, 11:07 AM   #4
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I would tell her that the clothes are off to goodwill but if she would like to take a look, she's welcome to anything you have. That way, the ball is in her court, and if she doesn't want them (or is too prideful to admit she needs them) nothing lost. Well done, by the way!!! You've lost so much, that's great!!
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Old 07-11-2006, 11:10 AM   #5
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I would offer them to her. I was in a similar situation with my sister in law. What I did is about every three months or so I clean my closet. I simply asked her if she would be interested or if she knows anyone who would be interested in having the clothes. If not I would send them to charity.
She was never offended, which I thought she would be. I think she looked at it as well I might as well.
It never hurts to ask and if she says she doesn't want them, then find someone else who would love to have them.

Good Luck!
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Old 07-11-2006, 11:20 AM   #6
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I gave the first round of clothes to Goodwill. Then, I found a great consignment store and sold the rest of them. I made about 100 bucks! If I had known someone who may have wanted them, I would have offered
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Old 07-11-2006, 12:21 PM   #7
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I donated my larger professional-quality clothing (and unused nylons) to an organization called Dress For Success ... they're a nonprofit group that provides clothing for low-income women who need to go on interviews or who need clothing for a professional job.
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Old 07-11-2006, 03:22 PM   #8
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My largest set of clothing was given to my Aunt that said "you've lost so much weight and anything size 20 or 2X, I want since you can't use them anymore". I gave them freely.
My next door neighbor was close to my size to start with. As I started losing she brought me a bag with 12 pairs of shorts all sizes 8 to 14. I appreciated them greatly and wore them a lot for walking. After they were all too big, I gave them back to her. I told her that "I noticed she had also lost weight and could use them again". This made her depressed and she said "I can't fit into any of those and now you are too small for them". I didn't at all mean to hurt her feelings. Her DH and mine work together. Her DH told mine that she was very depressed that I had lost so much weight and she hadn't lost a pound. I know that it is extra hard for her because she has 2 small children and her husband is about 5'10 and only 130 lbs. Their budget is tight and she says "I can't afford to buy special food for me to eat, I have to get what the whole family likes".
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