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Old 02-21-2006, 07:08 PM   #1
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Default I'm bad

I've decided to come here to bear my soul, as I've been reading, so have others. I've decided that maybe some feedback is what the doctor ordered.

I'm ecstatic to report that I've lost a whopping 12 pounds on South Beach sinse January 8th. Now that's fantastic in and of itself, but couple it with the fact that I've been hypothyroid for 15 years, have recently been diagnosed insulin resistant and it previously took me 1.5 years to lose 12 pounds despite diet and exercise.

I feel I've been focused and determined. What I thought was eating healthily before, has been replaced with the facts of South Beach...and I can say I have a much healthier diet for the first time in my life. I also exercise 1 hour a day, faithfully, before work.

O.k...now the bad part. For some reason...and if anyone can explain it to me...please do, I came home tonight
( tired from a long day at work of course ) and hub and I had a "tiff". I wouldn't call it a fight, or even an argument...a "tiff", a "squabble". Nothing big, we're not angry.

Well, we had nothing planned for dinner so he left for the gym as he usually does ( he lifts weights there, I prefer my exercise at home )...and then I proceed to eat a bowl of cereal ( Special K with some Splenda ) almost a whole bag of cashews (! ) and then moved on to a South Beach granola bar! Did I mention a spoonful of sugar free coolwhip to boot?!?! ( I'm so glad all that is in the house is Lowfat, sugar free stuff! I'd hate to think if I had chips and / or candybars! )

PLEASE, explain to me, how someone doing so well, so on target, can totally lose control like this! Maybe if I understand I won't let it happen again?

Now I'm sitting here feeling like a stuffed pig and mad at myself. I took a long hot, bubble bath in my jaccuzi tub and plan on hitting the pillow early tonight. I don't understand...

Thanks for listening. Thanks for letting me spew my frustrations! Thanks for any direction!

Susan
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Old 02-21-2006, 07:13 PM   #2
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Well my dear, there could be any number of reasons.

We eat when our cycle is coming, we eat out of boredom, we eat when we are hungry then we go for a little more, we eat for comfort...

It'll be okay. You just gotta pick yourself up and roll on sweetie.
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Old 02-21-2006, 07:30 PM   #3
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I do that sometimes too. I go a few days keeping on perfect track, then snap and eat anything I can get my hands on. I usually try not to let it bother me, I just get back on track the next day and put it behind me. One day isn't going to ruin everything.
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Old 02-21-2006, 07:33 PM   #4
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Excactly. What AquaChick said is spot on. If that is the worst that happens to your diet from here on you'll be lucky We all mess up, we all feel like we've ruined all that hard work. The only thing to do is to move and not let it bother it. Just take it one day at a time.
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Old 02-21-2006, 08:36 PM   #5
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So that was your dinner then? It's not super horrible. Sure, it could've been better but you picked Special K and a granola bar. Maybe you went over board with the cashews but so what? It's one meal. You could've gone for much worse things. Just pick up the pieces, and get back on track Steady wins the race and slip ups will happen. The important thing is to just keep going.

Get a little exercise in if you can tonight, it will make you feel better. If you can't, then get a good sleep and start fresh in the morning. You have already lost 12 pounds!! That's really good! Keep your chin up You can do it.
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Old 02-21-2006, 09:10 PM   #6
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I'm a sugar addict. Eating something sweet makes me long for more sweet things, more food. Cereal is a big time trigger for me, to the point that 18 months after I started my weight loss journal I don't have any in the house.

You didn't do anything wrong, you aren't bad, your diet is not off track. You're okay.

Possible suggestions:

* Make sure you plan what you are going to eat for dinner before you are hungry/restless standing around in the kitchen wondering what to eat. I do all my menu planning on Sunday. I know exactly what I'm going to eat every night for dinner. Maybe that's too much planning, but I haven't had a bingey "what the **** am I eating" night since the car broke down and we didn't have the celebration Thai food as planned and got home at 11:00 pm.
* If you're going to eat off plan, avoid empty sweet carbs. I know you used splenda but Special K is made with high fructose corn syrup and splenda does make it super sweet. Everyone is different and you may not be susceptible like I am, but eating a bowl of sweet cereal just makes me want ANOTHER bowl of sweet cereal.
* You didn't say, but make sure you eat enough calories/real, healthy food during the day. I always got "bingey" if I went too long without satisfying food. Extreme low cal, extreme low fat and "substitute" foods (sugar free, fat free that, meal replacement drinks, packaged diet foods) never made me feel like I was eating enough. Switching to eating whole foods with lots of protein and sufficient healthy fats every day really made a difference in how satisfied and happy I was all day.
* Find a mantra. It may sound silly, but I stopped a terrible binge at a work conference (tons of little pastries and truffles and frosted cakes) by throwing the entire paper plate into the garbage whispering "dripping water eats through stone" which is my little talisman for perseverance. A little drip of water could eat through a big old rock - little changes are what matter!

Just don't punish yourself Little blips do happen!
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Old 02-22-2006, 02:45 AM   #7
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I'll second what others said, it's sure not excellent, but it also could have been much, much worse. Just make sure to get back on plan the day after, and don't think that you've destroyed all of your efforts just with one accident (because if you do, you may go on with the "accidents", and then it will destroy everything).

As for why we can suddenly get into such episodes? Tough question. In my case, it can be something as silly as finding myself having to do something unplanned, which turns my plan for the day upside down and leaves me fetting out about not having enough time to exercise, etc. It can be stress. It can be boredom. These are common enough triggers, so maybe you can watch out for them in the future?
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Old 02-22-2006, 04:37 AM   #8
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Wow. You guys sure came through with the suggestions! Thanks a million!

Aqua,Linda,Stacy~thank you so much for your support! Dusting self off this morning and moving forward...just as suggested!

FitBoo~I agree, it could have been much worse. The feeling out of control is what scares me. Thanks for the encouragement!

Glory~Awesome suggestions! Thank you! I think you "hit the nail on the head" by suggesting to have something ready / planned every day. I thought about this afterwards and noticed it being one of the problems. My breakfast, 2 snacks and lunches are all methodically planned and executed. I'm tired and usually hungry at the end of the day...recipe for disaster if something triggers a "feeding frenzy" as I'll call it! And absolutely I've decided that cereal is a no-no and causes cravings for me ( Any suggestions on the best cereal to have around for a quick "something to eat"? ) And your mantra? Inspirational! May I use it? (LOL!) What a wonderful way to drive home the point that it's not so much the BIG picture, but the little decisions we make daily ... that will get us to goal...

Kery~You're so right about not dwelling on this. Sometimes it becomes an excuse to give up. I'm back on track this morning (mentally and physically ). My scale doesn't reflect the "blip" ( still 177 ) As I stated before...it's more the "out of control" I am / was scared about. I guess that answer has to come from me, not the rest of you. Gonna have to watch...and learn.

There's been so much more than just "calories in, calories out" to this journey. It's more about self-discovery, perseverance and really being in tune with your body and soul. All of the years I've struggled with this weight, asking doctors for help or a diagnosis, and was told "calories in, calories out". If only it were a mere matter of watching what you eat=moving equal amounts! I'd love all my doctors to live one day with thyroid disease and insulin resistance...eat what I eat...exercise like I exercise, and get the results I got. ( Oops...starting on my "I'm a bitter and angry patient" tangent again! lol )

Thank you all for taking the time to dig me out of this hole! Onward and upward and today's a new day...

Susan
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Old 02-22-2006, 05:06 AM   #9
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Re: Cereals, I try to avoid them as well, because even the so-called "fitness" ones (let's not start on the "cereals for kids", they're even worse) make me feel like I haven't eaten anything, and make me crave for sugar even one hour after. The ones I found work well for me are the All-Bran; I quite like the taste, and they're... filling, can't say it otherwise. I don't need to eat as much of them as with other cereals, and they're not terribly calories-laden (270 per 100g or something like this). They're not too tasty without a little milk IMHO, but if you haven't tried these yet, maybe it could work the same for you.
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Old 02-22-2006, 08:49 AM   #10
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The only other thing I would add to the brilliant advice already offered, is to find some strategies for dealing with eating for reasons other than hunger.

One of the things I did at the beginning was write down the situations in which I am likely to turn to food. For each one I wrote down things I could do instead.

I have substituted exercise, going on the internet, and colouring in (silly as it sounds) for over eating.

I think that is the hardest part of losing weight, it's easier to eat well when you are feeling mindful and positive, but days when your feeling ratty, irritable or stressed it is really hard not to fall into bad habits.

And whilst this time, it may be cereal and South Beach bars, whose to say next time it won't be a packet of chips and a tray of cookies.
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Old 02-22-2006, 12:18 PM   #11
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oh how i know how you feel!

i have eaten myself into a frenzy today. and its only just past 11am here. not good. NOT GOOD AT ALL....

i am frustrated at work. i am bored at work. i am just in a bad BAD BAD mood all the way around. and i have taken it out on food.

what the **** am i going to do for the rest of the damn day!
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Old 02-22-2006, 01:25 PM   #12
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Quote:
Originally Posted by itsforme
Glory~Awesome suggestions! Thank you! I think you "hit the nail on the head" by suggesting to have something ready / planned every day. I thought about this afterwards and noticed it being one of the problems. My breakfast, 2 snacks and lunches are all methodically planned and executed. I'm tired and usually hungry at the end of the day...recipe for disaster if something triggers a "feeding frenzy" as I'll call it! And absolutely I've decided that cereal is a no-no and causes cravings for me ( Any suggestions on the best cereal to have around for a quick "something to eat"? ) And your mantra? Inspirational! May I use it? (LOL!) What a wonderful way to drive home the point that it's not so much the BIG picture, but the little decisions we make daily ... that will get us to goal...
Hey, I'm glad you liked the suggestions I don't have any suggestions for a "good" cereal to keep around the house. I don't buy cereal at all anymore because I still can't manage it. I hate how small a "real" serving is and how I just want another bowl as soon as I'm done with the first bowl. Maybe a cannister of Quaker 1 Minute Oats and some dried blueberries? Very warm and filling and you actually have to make it, so you can't just keep pouring ready to eat cereal out of a box. My other "quick meal" staple is 2 pieces of whole grain toast with natural peanut butter. It's one of my favorite things ever. I find the combination just really satisfying.

Of course you can use the mantra! I love it so much I have it tattooed in Chinese characters on my back. It means a lot to me and helps me every day keep on track.
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Old 02-22-2006, 09:39 PM   #13
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I agree with kykaree. It's important to find other ways to deal with your emotions other than food. Emotional eating can sabatoge any diet. In life the going is going to get tough. There will always be stress and negative emotions, and most of us are conditioned to eat or crave certain foods in order to deal with that stress and emotion. It's a hard habit to break, and you probably aren't going to be successful 100 percent of the time. Just try and practice doing something other than eating with you have a bad day, or something negative happens. Eventually you'll learn new habitual ways of dealing with stress (hopefully not smoking, drinking or drugs) instead of eating. In the mean time, try not to get too down on yourself. Remember that in these cases, it isn't about the food. All the meal planning and healthy snacks in the world won't help when that emotionally driven monster takes over. Truly desparate emotional eaters will eat just about anything to numb their pain.
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Old 02-23-2006, 05:20 AM   #14
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Thanks. I've successfully gotten back on track without a hitch. Haven't gained and am hoping to see the next number this weekend.

I'm going to have to pay extra close attention to making sure dinners are planned in advance, that's for sure. I'll also be aware of the emotional factors. I successfully quit smoking 4 years ago so I know about the emotional struggles. Whether it be smoking or dieting...the emotional factors are always harder to contend with. I will have to focus and plan other ways of dealing, just as I did when I used to reach for a cigarette. That now has been replaced with other ways of coping. I'll do the same here.

Hope you're all having a great week! I'm focused, on target, getting ready to do an hours worth of exercise that I do each morning before work...and feelin' good!

Susan
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Old 02-23-2006, 07:13 AM   #15
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I think a lot of time we women are approval junkies. We don't like conflict, and never feel like we are on top of the situation when there is a conflict. Perhaps we haven't been taught how to be assertive (as opposed to aggressive or passive), and when a "tiff" happens we get emotions we don't know what to do with, or how to deal with in a productive way so we "stuff it down" along with food.

I think writing out our feelings or talking out our feelings would be a more productive way of handling it, but men (husbands) don't always want to hear about our feelings. They aren't the same sort of communicators as we are, and expressing our feelings often to them feels like we are "nagging" which is basically a negative term which has the effect of making us shut up even when it would be to our benefit to express ourselves more clearly. As a result we often have these unresolved issues that we don't know how to deal with. For many of us this stress of unexpressed emotions winds up being dealt with by eating.

Perhaps it is only in our heads that we hear "don't nag, just swallow your feelings..." But swallowing stressful emotions is bitter, we may need something "sweet" to swallow along with it!

I'm a firm believer in writing to get my emotions down on paper. Sometimes I write letters to people that I never send, just to express how I feel. Once I've seen it on paper I don't always need to have the other person see it, being able to communicate my needs and clearly explain them to myself is often enough. Other times I do let the other person see what I've written, particularly if it is a serious problem or an ongoing one. Or it may just be something that once I clearly understand it, I can express in a few words to the other person without them having to be subjected to the whole thing.

Stress does make your body have additional hormones, and creating fat is one way the body deals with stress. So eating after a stressful situation may be a natural response. Perhaps dealing with the stress in a different way would be the solution next time.
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