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Old 02-17-2006, 12:03 AM   #1
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Location: New York
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Default 8 years and I'm ready to give it all up

Ok so i've been trying to lose 20 pounds for 8 years. I've never succeeded... I know that I am very inconsistent aand I snack alot and sometimes "forget" to eat right. I know everything I've read every diet book and excercise book. I could write an encyclopedia on it!! There are just no good answers i've heard for my real problem which is self-control and consistency.... Any help would be massively appreciated b/c im on my last will here..
1st MINI-GOAL: 150

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Old 02-17-2006, 12:54 AM   #2
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I'm so there with you! I'm in my early 20's, but I have been going at this for almost 6 years now. I had success at one point and was at my goal weight for all of a month before I messed up. Since then I have gone back and forth with success and failure. Like you, I have thought about giving it up and accepting where I am. But ultimately I am happier going for what I really want than accepting what I really don't. I think that it's about more than knowing all the information and I know it's about more than willpower, because I do know a lot about healthy eating and exercise and have been so disciplined about so many aspects of my life, yet haven't found lasting success. I think ultimately it's about persistence. I hope you don't give up. You already have so many pieces to the puzzle. You know what you're doing, you know what does and doesn't work for you. Now it's just in putting it all together.

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Old 02-17-2006, 05:55 AM   #3
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Boy can I relate.
I have tried every diet and still end up where I started or heavier.
But don't give up. I figure we have not lost the battle if we still battle.
What was suggested to me is to write everything you eat for 2 wk and how you feel. This will help you find out your weak points. Its not easy writing down everything. It validates those tiny little bites. I will do this challenge with you if you want. I also was told to write down what you want to eat for the day on a 3x5 card and put it in your pocket to take with you for the day. Then when you go to eat write down what you actually had.

Good luck
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Old 02-17-2006, 08:28 AM   #4
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Don't give up, hon. Judi is right... the fact that you haven't "given up the battle" is huge. I've given up a few times, and now I've got 80 pounds to lose instead of 20.
You can do this... like Happydaisy said, you KNOW what to do. It just takes a little willpower, and you've got that, deep down inside of you.
I am a runner!

"Wouldn't it be wonderful to take all the evil people and put them over there, then we wouldn't have to deal with them. And all of us good people would stay right here. The problem is that the line separating good and evil cuts right through the human heart." Alexander Solzenitzen
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Old 02-17-2006, 08:42 AM   #5
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If I had a quarter for every time I've said ... Intellectually I know ....

It's putting that head knowledge into practice that's the hard part!
... Susan
Eat good food. Move yourself. Lift something.
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Old 02-17-2006, 10:34 AM   #6
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I spent 5 years miserable at 192 lbs without losing any significant amount of weight. I daydreamed about losing weight - fantasized about being thin like some people fantasize about winning the lottery. I obsessively read every diet book and weight loss scheme. I made half-hearted efforts to lose weight which generally amounted to a day of wild excitement/crazy plans of how I was going to only eat THIS THIS and THIS and how I was going to keep a food journal and work out EVERY DAY. These attempts would last 2-3 days before I just gave up and reverted to apathetic daydreaming.

I'm really not sure what changed to allow me to be successful. I did have a "click" moment - I went to sit down in a movie theatre bathroom and cut the outside of my thigh on a sharp-edged metal trash receptacle. My thigh bled and I cried, thinking that I had reached a point where I was "too fat" for a normal bathroom. In my head, all I could think of was a sad future of seatbelt extenders in airplanes and shopping in Lane Bryant for the rest of my life.

I had that feeling of "I must change something" when I read this book called Superfoods Rx: 14 Foods that Will Change Your Life http://www.amazon.com/gp/product/006...Fencoding=UTF8 . I picked it up at a Borders (I was always obsessed with diet/weight loss books, especially successful "after" stories like in Shape magazine) and flipped through it. I don't know how to describe it - it was like grabbing an electric fence.

Everything became very clear. How/why my previous unsuccessful weight loss attempts had been doomed to failure, what it would take to lose weight and keep it off. It was a transcendent moment of epiphany and my life changed forever on that day - I started that day and I haven't stopped, thought about stppping, longed for my old, self-destructive eating habits ever again.

What I did ended up being so beautifully simple - I quit eating foods that weren't good for me and started eating foods that were good for me. I try to exercise. That's it. So simple.

So, I talked too much, I wish I could bottle the feeling and give it to anyone that struggled like I struggled for so long. I wish I could go back to the 20 year old me, who thought I was "fat" (a little heavy, but definitely NOT fat) and prevent 15 years of yo-yo dieting, restriction and feelings of worthlessness and defeat.

Your post strikes a real chord with me, since I lived that same unhappiness for so long. I really do wish you the best of luck in your weight loss journey.
SIX YEARS at maintenance weight!

My very long weight loss story

"I saw an angel in the marble and I chiseled until I set it free."
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Old 02-17-2006, 03:22 PM   #7
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Height: 5'4"


Something that has helped many people on here...is you need to learn not to throw the whole thing out when you mess up. A few days a go, I ate an entire candy bar. That night, I didn't continue eating, I just stopped. The next day I didn't think I had to work extra hard OR give it all up, I just kept going like it never happened. Everyone has their own "aha!" moment, but sometimes repetitive action is just what eventually gets you there. Try not to think about the thinking bit too much, and just start to plan plan plan what you are eating, buying, and exercising. Don't worry too much about the scale, you need to change old habits one by one, so focus on those first (give up soda, buy only lean meats) eventually it becomes second nature and it's easier to work on other things.
Christmas Mini-Goal:

"What would you try if you knew you couldn't fail?"
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