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Is it destiny?

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Old 01-18-2006, 10:14 AM   #1
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I get frustrated sometimes and wonder if it's just meant to be for me to be fat because of my family. My mother and father and all of my aunts and uncles (Mom had 17 brothers and sister yikes) are overweight. I wonder if heredity plays a part. Don't get me wrong I know I can lose weight, I WILL continue to do so, I just wonder if we are "born that way or if we become that way" (sounds like we are all gay lol) What do you all think?
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Old 01-18-2006, 10:24 AM   #2
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I think we may have some genetic/hereditary disposition, yes, but I don't think it's destiny! We have the power to change a lot of things and weight is certainly one of them.

I understand how you feel though. I used to hate that my bum was so big, no matter what my weight was. You can't change EVERYTHING about your body, but you do have control over your weight if you want.
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Old 01-18-2006, 10:33 AM   #3
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Genes are a factor in determining how ur body will react to various things. That includes number of calories consumed and a lot of other stuff that is too much to mention here. Some of us get the genes making it hard to lose weight. Some have genes that make it hard to lose pounds in certain areas, but it is a big obstacle that can be won. **** some people can't gain weight no matter there efforts but theres always a way in all honesty. Our bodies aren't always the same sometimes, no always, someone will have to try something specifc to improve in certain area/areas. It just the way it is. Its another war in a way. Life is partly about facing and overcoming obstacles, money and weight, and faith, and who knows what else. U know what I mean. Good life and good luck!
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Old 01-18-2006, 11:38 AM   #4
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Your heredity can make it more difficult to maintain a healthy weight, but it doesn't make it impossible. Don't forget that if you're family is overweight, there are not only genes at play but habits as well. You not only have the body your family gave you, but the lifestyle.

I'm not a huge fan of Dr. Phil, but I like his weight loss book and this is a topic he addresses; I highly recommend reading it. There's also a great essay on fitness on Krista's Stumptuous site that discusses this in the third section. The whole article is worth reading, and she mentions the topic in the introduction as well, but here's the link to the larger discussion: http://www.stumptuous.com/cms/displayarticle.php?aid=36
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Old 01-18-2006, 02:05 PM   #5
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There was a thread about this last week. Let me see if I can find it.
Some Answers About Genes, Environment, Obesity and Maintenance

It always makes me happy to see folks who research and learn. More about their bodies, more about nutrition and exercise ... However ... keep in mind that no matter what you learn, you still have to eat less and move more. You can lose weight!
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Old 01-18-2006, 03:08 PM   #6
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I always thought I was destined to be fat, turns out that's complete rubbish. I have the power to take control of my own destiny and take responsibility for myelf rather than blaming genes or anything like that.

I believe that I may have a propensity to gain weight if I eat the wrong stuff and don't exercise. And maybe I gain more weight in that situation than other people do. But if I eat the right stuff, and I do exercise, that isn't a problem. So while I'm sure that my genes do affect my weight to some extent (but less than, for example, they affect my height), that doesn't mean that I have to play along with them and give them what they want.

I'm in control, and the only destiny that counts is the one I choose for myself.
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Old 01-18-2006, 08:10 PM   #7
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Hi, I've got "big" family genes too, but maybe that just means we might have to work a little harder for our chosen path. But hey your in the right place for support right? Everyone here has lost or is trying to loose. Thats hundreds of people choosing their own destiny.

We choose our own way in life, it just sux that some things we have to work way harder at. Plese don't give up, you are on the right track, you lost 17lbs !!!! Go You!!!, be proud of that, and be proud of yourself for being on this site and asking questions. Thats 17 lbs tword your chosen life, tword your skinny destiny. You just keep up the good work, and tell your family genes to kiss your A#% !!
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Old 01-18-2006, 09:14 PM   #8
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My personal take on this is that certain family DYNAMICS pre-dispose us to be heavy or thin. My family has never had a very healthy attitude towards food and my Mom especially (who else?! ) passed these attitudes and behaviors down to my brother and me; we're both now overweight! And I've watched both my parents struggle with their weight pretty much my entire life.

That said, I'm 28 now and can't blame them for the way I look! It does help me to understand the way I think about some things but I'm an adult and need to make my own decisions. I'm learning, slowly but surely!

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Old 01-20-2006, 04:31 PM   #9
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I always thought I was destined to be fat, and that was the excuse I used to never do anything about it. My father was very close to being (or WAS) obese, and I learned my eating habits -- such as they were (not ) -- from him. Things like, "eat the whole darn birthday cake overnight," and "one Pringles container makes a meal" .

Then, my fear/belief that I was destined to be fat was "confirmed" when I found my birthmother. She weighs 350+ lbs and needs a scooter to get around now. I was DEVASTATED because now I not only did I have a lifetime of horrid eating working against me, but now I had genetic "proof" that I was born to be obese. Which, I can tell you now, is complete crap. Not long after I found my birthmother, I got on the weightloss wagon and dropped 25 lbs in a year. I maintained that loss for 18 months and have now lost another 25 lbs.

We MAY have a genetic predisposition (I dunno), but in my opinion, it's more about the environment we grew up in and the environment we currently live in. I spent the first 17 years of my life watching my father eat entire logs of pepperoni, whole quarts of ice cream, and bags upon bags of chips. So of course that's how I learned to eat. And when he died (of an aortic aneurism brought on by high blood pressure + his weight, by the way) I REALLY started eating like him.

I know now that I'm NOT destined to be fat, and I think it's really important to let go of the belief that you are. I've found that this whole thing has been 100% a mental battle, and if you hold on to negative beliefs and tell yourself it's out of your control because of genetics (or whatever), the battle will be SO much harder because you don't fully believe you can do it.
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Old 01-20-2006, 05:17 PM   #10
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I think that you ladies are right. I DO think most of it is the environment in which we learn. My mother was, and still is with my children, the type that thinks food is a reward, it is a comfort. I was brought up that way, and she tries to push that on my kids. Finally she is starting to come around
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