3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support Give and get support here!

Afraid I will not be happy at GW

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 09-27-2005, 08:29 PM   #1
CE
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Columbus, Ohio
Posts: 41

Default Afraid I will not be happy at GW

I don't know if anyone else is feeling this way but I am so worried that I will not be happy at my GW. I am getting close but I still am doing worse with my self esteem and emotions than before I tried to lose weight. I was fine with my size and weight for a long time. I think I had learned to accept it. I am just so worried that no matter what I weigh I well not be happy. Does anyone else feel this way??
__________________
CE
colsnanny is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2005, 08:35 PM   #2
Determined
 
happydaisy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2005
Posts: 650

Default

Yep, I worry about that. I know when I did this the first time I was very much not satisfied. I got within 2 pounds of my goal weight and then blew it all the way back up. So this time I'm taking it slower and working on the emotional side of things too, or at least attempting to. I haven't necessarily had the "breaththrough" or whatever that will give me the answer. I'm hoping to find what that is here.
__________________

Short Term Goal:


Long Term Goal:
happydaisy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-27-2005, 08:57 PM   #3
Senior Member
 
aphil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Indiana
Posts: 6,411

S/C/G: 233.9/143/160

Height: 5'7"

Default

What I think is important to remember is that self esteem and happiness all throughout our lives will not magically appear once we fit into a size 5, or weigh 125 pounds. (or whatever our goal weight or size happens to be.) If you are not happy and self confident at 140, then you aren't going to be happy all of a sudden when you hit 130. It just isn't the way it works.
Self esteem and happiness comes from within.

BUT-this does not mean that you should sabotoge yourself, or forget your eating/exercise regime because you aren't going to all of a sudden be self confident, or have a dream life at your goal weight. Your goal weight is a big achievment, and it is something to really be proud of, but it doesn't change everything in your life.

Being healthier and more fit DOES do a lot of things though-so when you feel the sabotoge monster telling you "What's the point?" think about your health, your well being, and your fitness. Think about extending your life, and being more energetic for your family and friends.

I think it is important for self esteem and self worth to have something in your life that is "yours". If you have an interest, a hobby, or something that you are good at or enjoy, then DO it. Take time and do something regularly just for yourself. When you love yourself enough to take that painting class that you always wanted to, take those line dancing lessons, read that novel that you had been wanting to, or attending that adult French class in your area you are doing something that is for YOU. Everyone has an interest, or a talent, or something that they want/like to do.

When I married and had my children, I went from taking care of myself to taking care of them, and for a few years I forgot about ME. It really did a number on my self esteem. I had nothing for me-I lived my life for everyone else. When my youngest was around 8 months old, I said "enough!" I started taking dance lessons once a week, I started taking a long scented bubble bath once or twice a week when the kids went to bed instead of a quick shower-and I started exercising regularly when my baby napped. I started taking the time to do things for myself, and I started feeling better about myself because of it.

You are doing the right thing by doing what you can to get healthy and more fit, but it isn't instant happiness when you reach goal. As far as the actual weight goals, loss is the easier part of it all-keeping it off for life is the hardest part.
My advice is to live your life and create your own happiness by being true to yourself, and doing things for yourself, and not expecting happiness to come from reaching a weight or certain size.

Good luck,
Aphil
__________________

Start weight after baby #3: 233.9
Current weight: 143
90 pounds lost!
Ambriehl Saroj
aphil is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-28-2005, 08:42 AM   #4
Mel
Senior Member
 
Mel's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2001
Location: West Chester, PA
Posts: 6,963

Default

Aphil's right...happiness or unhappiness doesn't come from a number. I feel better and look better at goal than I did four years ago, but I'm still the same me. The things that made me angry still make me angry. The things that I don't like about myself are still there, minus the fat.

But it's sooooo worth it. Being able to move easily, knowling that I have and can continue to succeed at this, shopping for clothes in which I know I look good, knowing that I'm doing everything I possibly can to live a healthier life.... It's all worth it!

Mel
__________________
Falling down is not failure....Failure is staying down.
Save the Earth, it's the only planet with chocolate and wine.

It isn't about waiting for the storm to pass...
It's about learning to dance in the rain.

9 years at or under goal weight! Working Maintenance Everyday
Mel is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-28-2005, 10:02 AM   #5
Eating for two!
 
jillybean720's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Northern VA
Posts: 6,018

S/C/G: 324 highest known/on hold/150

Height: 5' 5"

Default

Just as a little expansion on what aphil and Mel have already mentioned--I am NOWHERE near goal, but in being obese for pretty much my entire life, I can say that we (or at least I have noticed this of myself and those close to me) tend to blame a lot of our problems on our physical appearance. I always thought, wow, it'll be easier to get a job, find a boyfriend, make friends, have fun, like myself, etc. when I'm thinner. The only reason I realized I was even thinking like this and that it is, in fact, untrue is that I found a great job, found a great boyfriend, and have been doing great things with my life even at about 300 pounds. Sure, I'll be able to find clothes a little easier when I lose the weight, but buying smaller clothes won't make me happy. Unfortunately, you have to be happy with yourself inside before you can be happy at any weight (and I say "unfortunately" only because the emotional battle can be even more difficult than the physical one, which we all know is no piece of cake in itself!).

I'm sorry I don't have any more helpful advice. Try taking a very long, serious look at yourself and the things around you--what is it that is truly making you unhappy? I'm sure it's more than simply an extra 10-or-so pounds. The good news is that once you find out what it is that's holding you back, while it may be depressing to realize or admit that there are other issues, you can work toward correcting them and making your way to happiness that much sooner. I know maybe that sounds cheesy, but it's true (at least in my head--I hope I explained it well enough)
__________________
*Jill*
Highest known weight: 324
Weight on morning of DS surgery: 308.5
Got down to about 185 before pregnancy;
Benjamin David born March 24, 2012, 7 pounds 11 ounces
Post-pregnancy: 206.5
jillybean720 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-28-2005, 09:40 PM   #6
CE
 
Join Date: Jul 2005
Location: Columbus, Ohio
Posts: 41

Default

Thanks for the advice. I think I was just having a bad day yesterday. I feel better today. Also I was mainly meaning happy with my body. I am pretty happy with my life. Thanks again!
__________________
CE
colsnanny is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-29-2005, 10:24 AM   #7
aka Superwoman!
 
2frustrated's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2004
Location: Finchley, London, UK
Posts: 6,461

S/C/G: SW:226/16st - about 50lbs lost

Height: 5'8"

Default

If you're still not happy with your body at GW, and you still want to look more "sculpted" then try lifting some weights - head over to the Ladies Who Lift forum and check it out!
__________________
Just. One.. More... Rep.... space Eat rubbish, FEEL rubbish!
BLOG
MARATHON BLOG

Tune In Eat When You're Hungry Eat Whatever You Want Sit Down, Put It On A Plate And Focus Enjoy! Stop When You're Satisfied
Own Your Body Move Support Yourself Be Your Own Guru


The perfect weight for your body is the weight which it settles at naturally when you are eating a balanced diet and exercising moderately
2frustrated is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-29-2005, 11:28 AM   #8
stbakd
 
hefty1's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2001
Location: toronto, ont
Posts: 1,007

Default

your body maybe telling you this the weight you should be. glen
__________________
see you all lighter
need something to light up your life become a match collector

hefty1 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-29-2005, 01:33 PM   #9
Eating for two!
 
jillybean720's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2005
Location: Northern VA
Posts: 6,018

S/C/G: 324 highest known/on hold/150

Height: 5' 5"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by hefty1
your body maybe telling you this the weight you should be. glen
How so?
__________________
*Jill*
Highest known weight: 324
Weight on morning of DS surgery: 308.5
Got down to about 185 before pregnancy;
Benjamin David born March 24, 2012, 7 pounds 11 ounces
Post-pregnancy: 206.5
jillybean720 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 09-30-2005, 10:04 AM   #10
Senior Member
 
aphil's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2001
Location: Indiana
Posts: 6,411

S/C/G: 233.9/143/160

Height: 5'7"

Default

What I think is important to remember, is that just because we are at a goal weight, that doesn't mean that our bodies are in top physical fitness. You can reach a goal weight of 125, 130, or 140 pounds...and continue to improve your body every day while staying at that weight.

You can stay at the same scale weight, and still lose body fat, and gain muscle mass. If you continue to exercise regularly, and really challenge yourself by increasing your weight when you strength train, try to go a little harder, longer, etc. when you do cardio, and try different forms of exercise to shake things up and surprise your body-your body can continue to improve and change shape.

My husband started working out again a few months ago, and he is still in the 179-184 pound range that he was when he started-but he looks a heck of a lot better. He has stronger looking legs, arms, and shoulders, and he has less "love handles" and excess fat in his belly area. He has went from a size 36 waist jeans to a 34, without losing on the scale. He has gained muscle, and lost body fat. (By strength training 3 days a week, and running about 10-15 miles per week, and while eating at the same calorie level, he has been eating healthier foods.)

So, if you are not happy with your body when you reach your goal weight, you may be 6 months, or 2 years after the fact with continued workouts that challenge you, and improve your fitness level.
__________________

Start weight after baby #3: 233.9
Current weight: 143
90 pounds lost!
Ambriehl Saroj
aphil is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 06:21 AM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2