3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support Give and get support here!

Is there anyone else who feels addicted to food?

Closed Thread
 
Thread Tools
Old 10-12-2003, 04:46 PM   #1
I'm doing it this time!
 
doIlookfat?'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Central CA
Posts: 293

S/C/G: 189/175/145

Height: 5' 4"

Default Is there anyone else who feels addicted to food?

Hello everyone!

My name is Heidi and I am a food addict.

I know why I am overweight. I eat too much. I know how to lose the weight. Eat less and move more. Simple? Ya right!

Whenever I try to lose the weight by eating less or avoiding high calorie foods, I always fall off the wagon. But it isn't a matter of willpower. An incredible urge to eat comes over me and I literally can't control my eating. I figured out that this feeling is what smokers feel when they try to quit smoking, or alcoholics feel when they try to quit too. I am an addict as well. Food is my drug of choice because it gives me that quick fix and sooths that feeling of urgency I feel.

I am now treating my "weightloss journey" and the rest of my life as if I was addicted to a drug. I have to eat, but I don't have to eat so much. (like eating between meals or night snacking) Instead of beating myself down for having no willpower, I've decided to attack the addiction. I don't want to be addicted to food anymore. Just like drugs, eating too much food can have harmful effects. Heart disease, diabetes, so many things I can't name them all here.

When I feel that overwhelming urge to eat too much, I have started to talk to myself as if I was about to grab a cigarette. Just like a smoker and cigarettes, I can't eat just one ho ho or ding dong. I am trying to walk away from my temptations and kick this bad habit once and for all. I know it won't be easy and I'm going to hit some major withdrawls, but it's something I have to do. It's this or fall off the wagon and stay off forever. I want to be at a healthy weight more than anything else in the whole world. I just have to keep reminding myself I want it more than a bag of Chips Ahoy!

Heidi
doIlookfat? is offline  
Old 10-12-2003, 06:17 PM   #2
I Can and I Will
 
Sandybrat's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2003
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 330

Default

Well Heidi... u c ertainly have the right attitude about this... I use this place as my urge fighter as well... i find that be being accountable to someone other than myself is a good thing for me. If i can help in anyway just ask... its a long and hard journey but with help and support from friends we can do this!

Sandy

PS... i would suggest u check out 'time for serious fun' its a great thread and the women there are FABULOUS!!!!
__________________
treat others as u wished to be treated

Height 5'10"

SW 245
CW 245
GW 170



Sandybrat is offline  
Old 10-12-2003, 06:21 PM   #3
Member
 
storylady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 71

Default

Heidi, I can so relate to what you said. I realized several years ago that I have a food addiction, particularly to sweets, but I'll 'overdose' on just about any carb in the right set of circumstances. In trying to figure out the why of how I got here, I took a look at my family when I was a child and it's clear to me that we all had our addictions (learned, perhaps, from an alcoholic father who refused help for decades, only to become and stay sober the last 10 years of his life?). I have brothers who are similarly addicted to alcohol, prescription drugs, work. My sisters and I have turned to food to medicate ourselves since we were young. It has really helped me in my struggle to lose weight to liken it to alcoholism: if I have one cupcake, or scoop of ice cream, I can't stop, I have to have more and more and more until, sometimes I am literally stuffed, painfully. And as sad as this sounds, there were times (not that long ago) when it was that overfull, stuffed oh-gosh-I-can't-move feeling from overeating that I was after! It's like I wasn't happy until I'd made myself miserable! So for me the answer, for now, is to not have one cookie or piece of cake unless I feel absolutely sure I can control the urge to binge on it. That sureness is gradually coming back to me, I feel stronger the longer I stay on program. And having lost 25 lbs so far I finally can think about all the hard work I've done and tell myself I've come too far, worked too hard to blow it now. And there are still days when I feel confident, go ahead and have the cake or whatever, only to find myself in misery 2 hours later, fighting off the cravings triggered by it. Physically triggered, or mentally? Sometimes I'm not sure. All I know is it's never worth the mental anguish I put myself through either fighting off the craving for more, giving in and eating the whole darn thing, or something else as a substitute, but still wanting more of IT, whatever it was.

As you can see by my ramblings this really touched a nerve! I applaud you for recognizing your 'addiction' and for coming up with strategies for dealing with it. The only advice I would dare offer is to not give up! Keep getting back on the wagon, there will come a time when you won't fall off, you'll hang on and win the battle. We're all here to give you the boost up, or the hand to hold if you feel yourself slipping. Alot of times when I feel that shakey must-have-sugar feeling, I come here and read and feel understood and supported.
storylady
storylady is offline  
Old 10-13-2003, 12:30 PM   #4
Senior Member
 
Skinny4baby's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: God's Glorious Green Earth
Posts: 352

Default

Please count me sooo in on this thread!!!..I find myself in such a battle with my inner-self over this?..I know that I need to lose weight...I know that I am sooo unhealthy...I know that I would feel sooo much betther if I lost the weight...I know that I could do sooo many more things if I lost the weight...I know that I would be happier!!....So

Why?..do I continue to overeat?...I am so frustrated?..I feel EXACTLY the way you all describe. I get up in the morning..I have a plan, I have done everything I need to do the night before, I have mentally "talked" to myself...But then when I wake up this AWFUL feeling of dread comes over me..almost like I am losing my best friend...I feel such an incredible PULL to food. I actually have little panic attacks!!..and I also feel like I could literally EAT the bathtub?..gross I know!!

I have often wondered to people of a "normal" size feel this extreme urge to eat food?...I have said quite a few times that if I could just not "face the food"..it would be better for me (the way a person who stops smoking does)..then I may do better?..BUT we can't stop eating!!!..I HATE to make food choices because I feel sooooo overwhelmed...

I have not mustered up the COURAGE or what ever the **ll I need like Heidi and Storybook?...I feel sooo LOST....sorry I am having a really BAD weight loss motivation day!!! All I know is that from the time I wake up to the time I go to sleep ...FOOD is an issue with me...When am I going to get to eat again...How much am I going to eat?......It is such a sick cycle!...I feel like I am in pain from this addiction to food?..Does anyone else feel pain from this?....
__________________
Skinny4baby
HW 383/SW 366/CW 259/GW 199
I just want to weigh 2 4 9 already?
Skinny4baby is offline  
Old 10-13-2003, 04:48 PM   #5
Senior Member
 
Southern Butterfly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Memphis, TN
Posts: 120

Default

I too am addicted to food. It gets so frustrating sometimes to have food on my mind all the time. To control what I eat, I have to have a plan at all times. I can never just say, "oh, we'll figure out what to have for dinner later." I have to know so that I won't "freak out" and eat everything. I have to stay away from sweets because when I think I'll have just one, it turns into hours, days, sometimes months of bad eating. The past couple of weeks I've wanted a doughnut. However, I know that if I allow myself one, it will turn into one dozen. My mind seems to go into a state of non-being when I eat sweets. I don't even remember what they taste like after I've finished. After these binges, I feel stupid, weak, angry, frustrated, lonely... I've never been able to talk about this to anyone before because I've felt like they would think I was "weird".
__________________
157/144.8/135
For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair, let a child run his/her hair through it once a day.
For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.
-Audrey Hepburn
Southern Butterfly is offline  
Old 10-13-2003, 05:13 PM   #6
Senior Member
 
Skinny4baby's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: God's Glorious Green Earth
Posts: 352

Default

oh my god!...MY MIND SEEMS TO GO INTO A STATE OF NON-BEING! This describes how I feel exactly. It is sooo much mental work/effort for me not to eat...that when I even slip in the slightest way I feel like my mind is well....in non-being mode!!

How in the world do we stop this?....All I really want to do is climb to the tallest mountain and shout.....snap out of it!..It's only food!!...I too feel so incredibly STUPID and weird. I actually feel numb to food. I have been trying to work myself up for about two months to finally get on the right track. I have read sooo many books!...and some have helped me a little..but I think I have failed so many times..I don't know what to do with all these emotions and confusion I am feeling?...I have only read the first chapter in Dr. Phil's book..I think because I am scared that he does have the answers BUT DO I HAVE THE COURAGE TO WORK THRU THE ANSWER TO MAKE ME STOP EATING?

Maybe in this forum (SUPPORT) we can find a way to help eachother?
__________________
Skinny4baby
HW 383/SW 366/CW 259/GW 199
I just want to weigh 2 4 9 already?
Skinny4baby is offline  
Old 10-13-2003, 09:05 PM   #7
Member
 
storylady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 71

Default

Skinny4baby and Southern Butterfly (I love that!) I feel exactly as you describe, have felt it all and can so relate. The thought of food is with me almost constantly, even now, when I feel like I'm finally getting some control over my addiction. I do WW so for me it's points constantly, how many should I have for breakfast, will it hold me until lunchtime so I'm not starving because I know that once hunger sets in, true hunger, I am so apt to lose control and eat anything that doesn't get me first. The amount of points I have left at any time during in the day is a number that is always in my mind, like a flashing neon light, and the higher I can keep that number, for as long in the day as I can, the better, more in control I feel, as though I've won. I do NOT want to feel like this forever, I am hoping with all I have that I can get past it, but it is a struggle. I'm trying to change my attitude toward food, from a treasured friend to a tool, one I use to fuel my body and keep going, nothing more. It's tough, no doubt about it, because I do love food. Your doughnut story, my life! I can remember when my kids were babies polishing off an entire box of doughnuts (bought 'for the kids' ) and thinking "where did they go?"

I think, Skinny, that you are on the right track with Dr Phil's book. I know the work you have to do with it is hard, I've heard and read some about it and it's scary stuff, to confront those things deep inside you. If you don't think you can face it all at once, try baby steps, a section at a time, an exercise at at time, think it over for a few days or a week, give yourself time to get a handle on it. Don't rush yourself. And in the meantime, give yourself a break, you too Southern Butterfly. As they told me in the few meetings of AlAnon I went to: you've taken the first step in recogizing that you have a problem, and can't deal with it alone anymore. You definitely are not alone. Is it too Bill Clinton corny to say I feel you pain? Forgive me but I do! We can do this, ladies, for ourselves and with help from each other.
story
storylady is offline  
Old 10-13-2003, 09:19 PM   #8
I'm doing it this time!
 
doIlookfat?'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Central CA
Posts: 293

S/C/G: 189/175/145

Height: 5' 4"

Default

You know, I have this all figured out...to a point. I know WHY I can't stop doing this, but actually stopping is another story.

Don't you hate it when people think "well, then just eat less" like it's a decision to be made just like that *snapping fingers*. They just don't get the pull food has with us, like a DRUG. It's easy to tell a drug addict "just stop taking drugs!". But can they stop that easy, or at all? Not AT ALL! I think, and I hope you guys agree with me, that food can be a drug too. And the worst part is it isn't as if we can just stop eating food. Oh, no, if only it was just that easy. I have to eat all freakin day long! You would never tell an alcoholic to just have one light beer, 3 times a day, and don't even THINK about finishing that beer! Drink it in moderation. Now, what raging alcoholic, who has never been able to control his/her drinking before, is going to be able to do that, or be expected to? Yet WE are expected to do just that with food, OUR addiction.

I wish there was some magic wand I could wave over all of us to make this all go away. I wish people would stop making us out to be weak and spinless, who COULD control their eating "if they really wanted to bad enough". It just isn't fair we are protraid this way. It just isn't fair.

Heidi
(who is wanting to eat a lot tonight; I'm depressed and want pie, but I don't HAVE PIE! GRRRRR!!! I don't know what I'm more upset about. Wanting pie or not having pie? Or both? Please tell me somebody out there understands!)
__________________
doIlookfat? is offline  
Old 10-13-2003, 11:16 PM   #9
Senior Member
 
Skinny4baby's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: God's Glorious Green Earth
Posts: 352

Default

oh! I understand!!! ...I more than understand!..I am the poster child for your complete upmost understanding!!!..I actually bought a banana cream pie last week...and it went right in the fridge (after I ate a big piece of course) beside the homemade banana pudding I made!..To make things worse for me I love to cook..I love to look at food, I love the colors, I love the smells!!! I love to watch the cooking channel.

Yes, it would be sooo nice if we could just say ok world...no more food for us!...I admit I am addicted to food...let me go to my meeting every week...and tell everyone to hind the food (like they hide booze) whenever I come over..Because I have an addiction and I can not eat??????.....

And what I know for sure...if I do not get a control over my problem ....I will die from it?
__________________
Skinny4baby
HW 383/SW 366/CW 259/GW 199
I just want to weigh 2 4 9 already?
Skinny4baby is offline  
Old 10-13-2003, 11:17 PM   #10
Senior Member
 
Skinny4baby's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: God's Glorious Green Earth
Posts: 352

Default

I mean HIDE...HIDE the food
__________________
Skinny4baby
HW 383/SW 366/CW 259/GW 199
I just want to weigh 2 4 9 already?
Skinny4baby is offline  
Old 10-14-2003, 10:39 AM   #11
Senior Member
 
Southern Butterfly's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2003
Location: Memphis, TN
Posts: 120

Default

Storylady, I know about the "number always in my head". I can tell you how many calories & grams of fat I've had and where they came from. I usually can spit off the top of my head how many cals are in what food/serving. I alot my cals/fat throughout the day. That way, I can say, "No, I can't have that ____ because I have to save those cals for dinner." Food has become numbers for me. That scares me because I read a story about a girl who became so addicted to the numbers of food that she eventually turned aneroxic.

DoIlookfat - you're right, they expect us to just go cold turkey. If it were that easy, I would have kept off the weight I lost 11 years ago instead of gaining and losing, gaining and losing.

Skinny4baby - I totally agree. They should hide the food. Instead, they bring it out. They shove it under our noses. Then they act insulted when we try and not eat it. You wouldn't tell an alcoholic, "Oh, just one gin and tonic. You're going to hurt my feelings if you don't at least try one. I made it just for you." So why do they do this with food?
__________________
157/144.8/135
For attractive lips, speak words of kindness.
For lovely eyes, seek out the good in people.
For a slim figure, share your food with the hungry.
For beautiful hair, let a child run his/her hair through it once a day.
For poise, walk with the knowledge that you never walk alone.
-Audrey Hepburn
Southern Butterfly is offline  
Old 10-14-2003, 05:15 PM   #12
I'm doing it this time!
 
doIlookfat?'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Central CA
Posts: 293

S/C/G: 189/175/145

Height: 5' 4"

Default

It is so comforting to know I am not alone in this, that I'm not crazy.

I've been listening to Dr. Phil and he does make sense. The only thing though is I don't have a major thing happen in my life that made me this way. It's my life now, not a past experience. I am a mother to 2. Bethany is 6 and Richie is 3. I do love them very much, but some days I feel trapped. The stress they cause me is unbearable most days. My oldest has been off track from school for 3 weeks and won't go back for 2 more. The two of them together is driving me nuts! I do have breaks (ds goes to preschool 2 mornings a week while I help my mom in her kindergarten class. I use to be a teacher), but it is never enough. We can't go out, they just take their fights out there where there is witnesses to see it all. I am all stressed out! Hubby does give me breaks too, but only at night to the store and back. I always have to come back. This is where the stress is and why I overeat. My kids will always be my kids and I know I made my bed, now I must lie in it. I miss my freedom, though. I really, really miss it.

Dr. Phil also said there needs to be a huge lifestyle change in my life if I am ever to lose weight. "You can't be fat unless you have a lifestyle to support it", he says. Yet here is my life, how can I change it? I don't want to go back to work and put my son in all day daycare again. This just causes me more stress. There doesn't seem like a way I can change things. My kids are my kids and they aren't going to change anytime soon. I have no money, no energy, and a lot of time on my hands to eat. It's the only thing that calms the nerves when I feel the most tense and stressed, which is almost all the time, unfortunately.

I hate blaming the kids like this. This just makes me even more of a terrible mother. I want to be able to leave the house whenever I feel like it, take a walk in the middle of the day by myself. I want them to stop screaming at each other for every little thing, and stop fighting with me when they think I'm not being "fair'. I want to relax, de-stress, and not medicate myself with food. There is nothing else out there that is so handy and so goooooood. Why why why??!!??!!

I drank a slim fast shake for breakfast. I ate a whole bag of corn nuts and 4 sugar cookies for lunch. Dinner is only going to be worse. I always go downhill from here. Maybe I need to start smoking. UUGGHH!! Please talk me out of that!

Heidi
doIlookfat? is offline  
Old 10-14-2003, 06:46 PM   #13
Member
 
storylady's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Posts: 71

Default

Heidi, DON'T DO IT!!! Smoking will only make you feel worse, physically and mentally. But you know that. I so sympathize with and the kids. My 2 are 15 months apart. When they were little I felt very much the same, trapped. It seemed as though the years before they would ever go to school would last an eternity. I got really heavy during those years. I ate out of frustration, boredom, to relieve the stress, because I was mad at DH for not helping me, to reward myself for making it through the day sane or something like it. I ate because I wanted to, I loved to (still do) and because dammit I was grown and nobody could tell me not to anymore. I know it's only a bandaid for you and no real help at all but the years will pass and you'll look back thinking where did the time go. Your life will be yours again, to an extent. And the kids fighting? Man. My 12 and 14 year old would still fight over the same breath of air, especially if they knew I would be there to see it. They do it force me to take sides, to choose who I love best, I guess. Some days I can blow it off and ignore it, others I end up screaming right back at them to stop it. Think awhile longer on the lifestyle changes you could make. Don't close the door on that yet. Really give it some thought about what you want, how you live (if you are like me you do all the shopping, cooking, planning on eating out where and when). If so, you have a tremendous amount of control over what you bring into the house, how it is prepared and the what where and how much of when you go out to eat. Think about it. My guess is the kids may have only a couple of favorite treats that they "can't" do without, the rest they won't miss if you subsitute something else healthier, that you can have right along with them. Think about this again, okay?

Skinny4baby--I could have written your post! I buy way too many magazines because of the pictures of food, so delicious looking! I watch way to much Food TV (love Rachel Ray and Tyler Florence). I too love to look at food, smell it, work with it, I love to cook, especially bake. I used to be a cake decorator before my hands gave out, that's a whole other weight related saga right there!

I think what we all have to remember that no matter what we may think others are thinking, it's what we think that matters most. And no, we probably cannot go cold turkey and turn our food issues around in a snap. But we can take baby steps, one thing at a time. The most important thing I learned through WW is the Positive Self Talk. The messages we have running through our heads all day are so powerful: "I'm a rotten mother" "I can't control my eating" " I hate the way I look, feel" "I have no control" Those messages are so powerful that after 'hearing' them for so long we truly begin to believe them, and in doing so believe that that is it for us, we have no hope of ever being different. We have to change that dialogue in our minds. One thing a day. Just one. Focus on changing one negative for one positive. "I have no control" to "I may not have complete control all day, but I have control RIGHT NOW" "I'm a rotten mother" becomes "I'm devoted and loving, and yes overwhelmed and stressed!!! But I do the best I can, and right now that means loving myself too, without food."

There is no magic wand to wave ladies, we have to do this hard work ourselves. And no, it's not easy. Lately my hair has been falling out and my skin so dry it's horrible. I bought some peanuts to help get in some "good fat" . Have I managed to limit myself to one serving of peanuts yet? Is the Pope Baptist? Nope ain't done it. And if I don't get a handle on this, I'll not only not lose this week, I'll very likely gain. More guilt, more self loathing. I have to stop NOW, not after the can is empty. We are all in this together.
I hope I'm not preachy, please forgive me if I am. I feel very passionately that we can over come this, I have and I am. We all can.
story

Last edited by storylady : 10-14-2003 at 06:49 PM.
storylady is offline  
Old 10-14-2003, 07:08 PM   #14
Senior Member
 
Skinny4baby's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2003
Location: God's Glorious Green Earth
Posts: 352

Default

Heidi...YOU ARE NOT A TERRIBLE MOTHER!...you have enough courage and love for them to admit that you have a problem. I think it is kinda ironic that me and you have opposite problems. I spend alot of my waking hours wishing and dreaming of when I will have a baby! I feel I have waaay to much time on my hands.

It is very eye-opening for me to see the other side!..I hear you!..I have three thoughts here for you..#1..Try to find someone ..either a family member you would trust..maybe a distant cousin?...or an older person who could keep your son..only while your daughter is in school..OR even a different daycare?..check around to several daycares..do random drop-bys..ask friends where they take their kids?..then find a job that is during school hours only...Yes..I know that it will be hard..BUT..it is worth a try?...Even if it a job that you really think you may be over qualified for...at least it would get you out of the house and connecting with ADULTS! #2..You must find a way to get some ALONE time..this is so crucial to everyone!!!...If it means dh has to keep the kids while you sit in the back yard with a good book in the sunshine or maybe your mom could babysit more..Do you have any nieces that could babysit...Maybe for exchange of a purse you never use or a promise to take her to the state fair?..these are just random examples.. #3..Have you tried to have more "structure" in you day..I know that last year when I was doing sooo good on my eating plan..Every morning I took a pen and paper and planned my day. With you being responsible for two children...shaping who they are everyday of your life...with every word you speak to them...making good memories with them...setting boundaries when needed...I believe that parenting requires setting goals for the day or the week...discussing them with your children ..and then working toward it...I think it helps create a less stressed out environment for YOU and them!..I think I will begin to take my own advice here..who knows?..maybe I will get back on plan..by the way ...I lost 47 pounds in eight months doing this...Just making goals everyday..making plans so I did not get bored...and making myself stick to them!..Was it hard...YES!...but we are worth...your children are worth it!

I know that our compulsion to eat is all MENTAL...here's hoping we all can conquer this demon one day soon!!!
__________________
Skinny4baby
HW 383/SW 366/CW 259/GW 199
I just want to weigh 2 4 9 already?
Skinny4baby is offline  
Old 10-15-2003, 12:54 PM   #15
I'm doing it this time!
 
doIlookfat?'s Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Central CA
Posts: 293

S/C/G: 189/175/145

Height: 5' 4"

Default

Storylady- What you said is what I say to myself all the time. "I'm grown up and no body can tell me I can't eat what I want!" Does motherhood get much easier, or is this the easy part? A lot of people tell me I need to enjoy this part (when they are young), but I am miserable. I know I will look back and regret something I didn't do or say, but that will come later. Right now I must suffer through it the best I can. Thanks for all the help and advice.



Skinny- I have listed every thing you said in my to do list, and hopefully I can fight this. Thanks!

Heidi
doIlookfat? is offline  
Closed Thread
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
I'm On a Binge KendraLynn Chicks in Control 14 12-26-2008 01:33 AM
300+ And Ready To Try Again.. #874 brandnewme 300+ Club 31 04-04-2006 02:33 AM
The 5% Club - Four Years of Fitness FitandFine Support Groups 22 09-02-2002 04:26 AM
Stay At Home Mom's #35 Freckles Weight Loss Support 40 03-10-2002 09:12 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 09:48 AM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2