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Old 09-04-2003, 06:00 PM   #1
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Unhappy Why bother?

Why bother to try to lose weight? The statistics clearly show that it is almost completely pointless so why bother?

What is the point?

We try diet after diet after diet. Low carb, high carb, protein, no protein, liquid, solids, pils ... and exercise fad and gadget after fad and gadget.

For what?

To loose a few pounds and then turn around and gain it back with interest?

Even surgery, drastic as that is doesn't really have that great of a success rate.

So why?
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Old 09-04-2003, 06:11 PM   #2
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Yes, you're right about success rates being very low - I ignore the stats as much as humanly possible.

Change is a funny thing. I've read a book just about how to change yourself, habits, lifestyle and such. It takes the average person many times to change - usually at least more than two, according to this book. And one change effort takes about 6 months to complete the cycle.

Why do I try? Because I think that we all have a good chance to make a difference in our health. Pills, fad diets and such have always seemed stupid to me - I'm committed to making changes that I can sustain forever.

You should meet my friends on the End of Time Change thread. Many of them, nearly all of them, have lost significant amounts of weight over long periods of time and are keeping it off most successfully. They all feel much better, not least because they've proven that they CAN make a change, beat the statistics. That's why I strive to change anything about myself, not just my weight: because the habit I'm focusing on is destructive and doesn't make me happy, and I'd like to know that I can change myself for the better.

Besides, what's the point of living if we're not always striving to make life better, even if we fail? I like where I've been put, like that I have this challenge ahead of me, that I'm on a difficult but do-able journey towards fitness.

Tell me how you're doing. What prompted these questions?
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Old 09-04-2003, 06:26 PM   #3
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Hi Mrs K,

Okay, I couldn't resist answering your questions.

Why bother when statistics say diets don't work? Well, first off, because statistically speaking obesity is a death warrent. Your chance of heart disease, infertility and or having children with birth defects, cancer - breast, uterus, ovary, stomach, colon...etc, diabetis, arthritis, stroke, back injury, foot injury, knee injury, joint pain, etc..........ALL INCREASE with excess weight. That is reason enough.

I think that many Americans get sucked into the diet fads and gadgets...the quick fix. Come on, logic says that the 5 minute ab work out isn't going to do the trick. That simply breathing a different way won't do the trick. Etc. Fad diets don't work....we all know what we need to do, what good nutrition and portion size is, etc. And I think we've all fallen victim to the anti fat campaign of the 80's....shame that no one has thought, "Gee, what are they replacing the fat with?"...it's sugar! Is that any better?

I say, become informed and work at it. I've got a lot of weight to lose and frankly, I'd love to stay on my couch, eat what I want, and do nothing. On the other hand, I'd like to be able to wake up and feel normal. To be able to walk straight with out pain. For a long time I've fooled myself, ignored what I was doing, even excused it, and now I've started to develop serious health issues.

So, I might not succeed. I might succeed and fail. I might get out and exercise but not lose weight. I might...I might...I might....but on the other hand, I don't want to regret what might have been. I'm tired of the shoulda coulds woulda mentality I've had for so long. How much of life have I missed because of this weight?There is no easy answer, no easy way out. And that's the facts.

It's a complex issue. Mentally and physically. I know that. I think we all do. I suggest you go to the library and do some research. Fat of the Land: The American Obesity Epidemic....by Michael Fukomto is a good book to read. Not too sure about the whole title or the author's last name but they're close enough that you can find them.

I think the statistics on the certainty of death from obesity, even being 20 lbs over weight, far out weigh (pardon the pun) the statistics that relate to diet failure. This is no way to live and frankly, it scares the **** out of me.

Sorry for the lecture....but you really need to consider what you're saying and what the pay off is. Just think off all the things that never would have been invented, tried, etc. if they hadn't been attempted? You need faith, patience, and determination. I think any attempt, as long as it's not extreme like anorexia and bulemia, is worth the effort.

Good luck!

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Old 09-04-2003, 06:27 PM   #4
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I don't know exactly. I'm just sick of being fat. I'm tired of trying thing after thing and doctor after doctor and always gaining the weight back.

Today was the first day ever in my life that the scale read 300 pounds.

I just don't think I can do it.

I know that what you all say is true. I'm just so depressed and moving is damn near impossible... I just don't think I care any more. It is almost like dying wouldn't be so bad.
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Last edited by MrsK : 09-04-2003 at 06:31 PM.
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Old 09-04-2003, 06:29 PM   #5
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LET'S SEE DIABETES, HEART DISEASE, JOINT AND MUSCLE PROBLEMS, ARTHRITIS, STROKE NEED I GO ON? IN OTHER WORDS, HARD AS IT IS TO LOSE WEIGHT YOU CAN


DIE!!!!! THAT'S GOOD ENOUGH REASON FOR ME!



PLEASE LOOK AT MY STATS AND THEN SAY YOU CAN'T DO IT! YOU CAN DO IT AND I WILL HELP YOU! VISIT MY THREAD TIME FOR SERIOUS FUN HERE ON SUPPORT!
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Old 09-04-2003, 06:43 PM   #6
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Default Yo!

MrsK!!!! We are all here for you!!! I am so glad you came here and posted your question, because it's a good one! For me, it's all about the journey; I like this quest for fitness that I'm on and I like that I pursue my goal through thick and thin (literally!! )

But it IS hard not to be discouraged by a weigh-in and by the way this journey seems to go on and on ... I think it does, it's a lifetime quest! But I think the short answer (I'm never short) to your question about why you should care is that YOU ARE WORTH IT! You are the only you in this universe, so don't give up on yourself and I hope you enjoy the journey.

Sorta like that song, "If you get the chance ... to stand up and dance ... I hope you dance ... I hope you dance!" In the end, why not? Doesn't cost anything to dance!

I also hang on the End of Daylight Savings Challenge (End o' Time Zone) thread. I'd explain the concept but you gotta visit us and see!!! But all the threads are different and full of supportive people!!!

Don't go way, now!! Stay and play!!! Hooray!


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Old 09-04-2003, 06:44 PM   #7
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Mrs K,

If you feel that it is completely hopeless, then why are you here? Why are you posting in a support thread?

Are you hoping that we will have something magical to say? Are you hoping that one of us will say that one thing that can change your mind?

We can't. ONLY you can make that decision. Only YOU can decide that you want to live and stop letting the world pass you by. Is it easy? No. Is it hard? You better believe it. But statistics.....schmatistics, I say. Make a liar out of those stats. YOU be the success story. You be the one that takes it off and don't let it come back.

I think the true question that you need to ask yourself is if you want to live. I mean, really live. Not just go through the motions. If you want something bad enough, you can do it.

If you need help, we're here....but YOU have to take the first step.

No one can do it for you.
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Old 09-04-2003, 06:46 PM   #8
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MrsK, I'm so sorry that you're feeling such pain about your weight. It's true, you do have a good chunk of weight to lose. So do I. I weigh about 225 currently, and though I've been happily hanging around 3FC for a while now, I haven't lost any weight.

I hate thinking about how much weight I have to lose. I think you should talk to Amarantha, who has lost about 100 pounds so far on her journey. I really think she could talk to you about discouragement and immobility much better than I.

We all go through these periods of "Who Cares?" and "I'm never going to beat this". I know you're aware of this very universal fact. I'm glad you're posting about feeling this way - I tend to stay away from my friends here when I feel this way, and that's dumb. I mean, what are we here for? We'll be here for you, and you'll find a way to get healthier. I mean it! You have all the resources inside you to change yourself, and if you can't do it alone, come here and vent all you want!

Here's my thing: I just read (in desperation not unlike your own) an O Magazine article about women who hate to exercise just for exercise's sake, but love getting their exercise in in sports or whatever. Soccer's my big love - I played it (badly) in college five years ago and want to take it up again. So, I'm running (only for like a minute at a time!) and walking so I can run forever eventually on the field, and my first league practice is Saturday. I'm expecting discomfort and humiliation for a while since I can't keep up, but I'm determined to get good at it. Maybe it isn't a sport, but try thinking about something you could do to get moving - anything! Dancing (maybe in private) lessons, swimming, softball, tai chi (you can be ANY size to do that!). It's gonna be hard for a while - I'll get on here later and whine about soccer, I'm sure!

I'll be around...

HEY, Amarantha, I KNEW you couldn't resist this thread! I knew I'd see you here!

MrsK, stick around - we'll find the answers together!

Last edited by Cerise : 09-04-2003 at 06:56 PM.
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Old 09-04-2003, 07:11 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally posted by QueenB
Mrs K,

If you feel that it is completely hopeless, then why are you here? Why are you posting in a support thread?

Are you hoping that we will have something magical to say? Are you hoping that one of us will say that one thing that can change your mind?

Not looking for a magic bullet by any means. Just wondering what keeps everyone else going. Surely, I'm not the first person to spend years on this merry-go-round who wonders these things.

Sometimes asking these qeustions helps me find new perspective that I can apply to my life.
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Old 09-04-2003, 07:18 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally posted by Cerise
Here's my thing: I just read (in desperation not unlike your own) an O Magazine article about women who hate to exercise just for exercise's sake, but love getting their exercise in in sports or whatever.

MrsK, stick around - we'll find the answers together!
Thanks!

I think in part it is just nice to be able to say something like this and not hear someone who only has 10 pounds to loose say, "Oh well all you have to do is ...."

About the sports thing.

I did do one amazing thing today. My daughter is very into Tae Kwon Do and her instructor used to be my instructor 10 years ago. Well, long story short, my friend and instructor has talked me into trying TKD again. So I ordered a gi in my size (hard to find by the way) and next week I'm going to start TKD.

I love TKD but I hate aerobics classes and videos. So maybe this will be the start to getting off my butt!
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Old 09-04-2003, 07:18 PM   #11
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What keeps Cerise going: nothing, sometimes. I quit for a day or days at a time or whatever. Then I get back on the wagon. It's still moving, still going forward.

I actually believe that sometimes one person CAN say that One Special Thing that changes everything. It's happened to me. The One Thing I hear often on this forum is, "You can do it!" and I believe them and love them for saying it. You stay here even if you're not ready to keep moving. Someday you will be ready, and I want to be there for it!

Keep on askin' the questions, lady.

Just read your postie about Tae Kwon Do. DO IT, DO IT, DO IT!!!!!

Don't wait!!! That's my new motto. Don't wait til you're thinner or more energetic or feeling more brave. Just GET THERE AND DO IT!!!!!

You're a brave lady NOW and I'm so HAAAAAAAPPY!

Last edited by Cerise : 09-04-2003 at 07:21 PM.
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Old 09-04-2003, 07:25 PM   #12
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Default Re: Yo!

Quote:
Originally posted by Amarantha
MrsK!!!! We are all here for you!!! I am so glad you came here and posted your question, because it's a good one! For me, it's all about the journey; I like this quest for fitness that I'm on and I like that I pursue my goal through thick and thin (literally!! )

But it IS hard not to be discouraged by a weigh-in and by the way this journey seems to go on and on ... I think it does, it's a lifetime quest! But I think the short answer (I'm never short) to your question about why you should care is that YOU ARE WORTH IT! You are the only you in this universe, so don't give up on yourself and I hope you enjoy the journey.

Sorta like that song, "If you get the chance ... to stand up and dance ... I hope you dance ... I hope you dance!" In the end, why not? Doesn't cost anything to dance!

I also hang on the End of Daylight Savings Challenge (End o' Time Zone) thread. I'd explain the concept but you gotta visit us and see!!! But all the threads are different and full of supportive people!!!

Don't go way, now!! Stay and play!!! Hooray!


Thank you for your view point. It is good to hear from others that this isn't an unusual feeling.

I think seeing 300.0 on the scale was a bit more than my brain/ego/self-confidence was ready for.

Not that I don't know I'm fat, of course. But to see myself top 300 ... it was sort of always a consolation with me that I'd never hit 300!

Time for a reality check!
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Old 09-04-2003, 07:32 PM   #13
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Default Re: Magic Bullet

Quote:
Originally posted by Cerise
What keeps Cerise going: nothing, sometimes. I quit for a day or days at a time or whatever. Then I get back on the wagon. It's still moving, still going forward.

I actually believe that sometimes one person CAN say that One Special Thing that changes everything. It's happened to me. The One Thing I hear often on this forum is, "You can do it!" and I believe them and love them for saying it. You stay here even if you're not ready to keep moving. Someday you will be ready, and I want to be there for it!

Keep on askin' the questions, lady.

Just read your postie about Tae Kwon Do. DO IT, DO IT, DO IT!!!!!

Don't wait!!! That's my new motto. Don't wait til you're thinner or more energetic or feeling more brave. Just GET THERE AND DO IT!!!!!

You're a brave lady NOW and I'm so HAAAAAAAPPY!
Thanks!

I start Tae Kwon Do next week and I'm even going to throw in a couple of cardio kickboxing classes too!

I loved TKD and I think that this might be a good way to start moving with something I love taht I don't really consider "exercise" in the same horrible way I think of aerobics!

I'll even have hubby take a pic of me in my gi and I'll use it as an avatar!
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Old 09-04-2003, 07:35 PM   #14
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Oh, yeah, baby. That's a great idea. MrsK, the butt-kicker!
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Old 09-04-2003, 07:40 PM   #15
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Quote:
Originally posted by Cerise
Oh, yeah, baby. That's a great idea. MrsK, the butt-kicker!
I don't think I can get my leg up that high yet. Maybe MrsK knee kicker?
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