I know it sounds paranoid but I was watching this show about a lady who lost a bunch of weight, I think she had WLS.. Anyway, she was a really good mama when she was big but then she lost the weight and starting partying, everything was all about her. I remember her daughter crying on the episode saying she missed the way her mother used to be.
I just worry that I would do something stupid like that. But then I know have more sense than that.
Do you feel like you changed as a person by gaining weight? Because I don't feel like I've changed as a result of my weight gain, so why would I change when losing weight?
Do you feel like you changed as a person by gaining weight? Because I don't feel like I've changed as a result of my weight gain, so why would I change when losing weight?
Yes, I have changed a lot since I have gained weight, not for the better.
ReeseJimi -- there are alot of factors here but how you react to your life challenges are kinda in your own hands. I read earlier how a woman who lost weight appeared to have lost her children along the way. That comes down to personal attitude and personal belief systems I think.
Life will change, it has to, but you can control how you react to your changes. If you have a smaller body and immediately feel that you "missed out" on being a teen and hit the clubs at the expense of your family, well, then, you've made that choice. And there are consequences for that.
It isn't that weight loss will "do" something to you. It's whether or not you have underlying unaddressed issues that you will act on when your life changes. And you'll also have to figure out how to deal with shifting interpersonal relationships, where you don't fit the "expectation" for example or if you are treated differently after you become slim. Family relationships, friends, it all changes. Expectations, you name it.
Just my 2 cents worth.
Little story, I lost a big chuck of weight which motivated (her words) a coworker to try to get healthy and she did and I was her biggest fan and thought I would have a weight loss buddy...as she was morbidly obese at 300+...but now she is out of control with the "expert attitude". She truly acts like she is the only person to ever lose weight...you almost root against her...because of the condescending know it all she's became. But her health is way more important to me that my feelings, so I truly want her to get to a healthy weight regardless of the daily attitude.
She is still quite heavy at 240ish and had the nerve to tell me "I would like to be chunky like you" I was 157 at the time...only 17 pounds from goal and I started at 220! So that comment hurt! I didn't make goal and started to gain and I could hear the delight in her snarky comments.
So yes weight loss completely turned a fun, kind and caring someone in to a very competitive and rude person with a mean streak.
But lesson learned...like always....girl suck sometimes! We can't build ourselves up with out tearing others down!
Last edited by jajomo0118; 01-06-2015 at 09:33 PM.
I've been all over the place since my major weight loss back in 2012 (Gah, was it really that long ago? Jeeze!). The biggest change was my mental state - I've always had issues with depression and anxiety, but they were manageable without medication up until I started losing weight, and it peaked when I reached my ultimate goal last year (getting under 145 or in the "normal" range of the BMI scale). I started, literally, going nuts and started having anxiety attacks on a regular basis. I want to get to that weight again because I like the way I looked; but honestly, I'm terrified. I did end up getting medicated and that has helped, but I really would prefer to be able to manage it like before. But, much of my issues are hormones/related to my cycle, so I don't know how much of that I can control. I just know when I don't take my medicine, I'm in no way a fun person to be around.
Other than that, like I said, I've been all over the place, up and down. I feel like I've become a better person -- more confident and not quite as shy as I used to be, although I'm still somewhat shy. Really, the people around me changed more than I did. I lost a couple friends along the way -- friends who were also overweight when I was and were jealous of my success.
Ultimately, there's no way to know how you'll be once you lose weight. Your life can take all kinds of turns in the process, and there's no reason to give up on your goals because you're afraid of what the future will bring. Cross that bridge when ya get to it.
I changed a lot and I believe mostly for the better. But I wanted to change. I wasn't happy with myself as a person or with my weight. I made the weight loss journey one about being the best version of myself in all areas of my life. I also live a completely different life with different friends, hobbies, beliefs etc. I'm much happier and feel more in control of my life and I no longer tolerate negative people. But aside from all the good stuff, I've changed for the worse in one way and that's my relationship with my own body. Losing weight triggered my body dysmorphic disorder and as I've continued to lose, it continues to get worse. So even though I am over-all happier, healthier, and a better person, and in general living the life I want....I'm actually am less comfortable with my body. It's frustrating and something I need to work on.
Last edited by Dottington; 01-07-2015 at 01:24 PM.
I did change a lot, for me it was like I was sleeping and suddenly I woke up, with this amazing thirst for life. I felt happier than ever and truly alive. So although not all, I would say most changes were for the best. What I didnīt see it coming was the negative side my weigh loss could awake in others. One my female best friends was jealous to the point of being mean, my two male best friends suddenly saw me as a woman instead of an unattractive friend and they didnīt handle it well.
I would say overall my character didnīt change, I still have the same character qualities and flaws. But I did change the way I live life and how I perceive other people and their actions (low self esteem made my tolerance levels to be much higher than they should). For me, it was a bittersweet awakening, that I wouldnīt change it for the world. I donīt think the obese girl will ever completely go away, and thatīs fine, but Iīm definitely not her anymore.
It's frustrating and something I need to work on.
