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Old 12-14-2014, 03:28 PM   #1  
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Default How to get motivated through the day

Im a calorie counter and last year I lost about 30 pounds. Counted calories faithfully, exercised, and it took me about 3-4 months to shed the 30 pounds. Shortly after, there was a death in the family which started everything going out of control. Then we had the holidays then after that a job change. I kept telling myself I will get back on track but here I am and I have gained about 15 of those 30 pounds back.

Its been very frustrating because I simply feel like a failure. I mean I just cannot understand why I can not manage to stay under my calories (roughly 1980) for just one day. As far as the exercise, with the new job and hours change.....exercise has gone out the window.

So I guess im asking what others have done to get back on track. I just eat and eat and eat. Unless I stay home and do no socializing, theres food everywhere and I feel like I have to eat....sometimes it seems as though I don't even realize im eating.

Any suggesstions??

Thanks so much!
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Old 12-14-2014, 03:58 PM   #2  
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I can definitely sympathize. One of the best ways that I have found to motivate myself is through planning. Then again, I'm a planner. But if I come on to this site and read about recipes, or I add apps to my phone about workouts and losing weight, or if I work on making a grocery list and plan meals....it all helps me to feel more motivated. I'm not sure if this helps you, but just thought I'd share what is helpful for me
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Old 12-14-2014, 04:52 PM   #3  
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I calorie count too, and I do a few specific things to keep myself on track.

Probably the most important thing I do is pay attention to what makes me feel full and what doesn't. This might be specific to the person, but for me it means trying to stick to certain carbs only, like brown rice and steel cut oats, and have things like white bread and cookies only occasionally and in small amounts, because if I eat those things I feel hungry shortly afterwards. Fatty things make me feel full, especially when mixed with protein, so I eat red meat fairly often, too. Finding what works best for you is likely a good idea.

I also reward myself regularly for staying on track, not for pounds lost. I set a date, and if I haven't missed logging (or at least, if I've been on track more than I haven't, and am on track on the day) I get a reward. I don't punish myself for anything, and it's okay if I gain weight even, as long as I've been logging and legitimately doing my best.

Last edited by faiora; 12-14-2014 at 04:53 PM.
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Old 12-14-2014, 08:18 PM   #4  
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I also lost 30lbs last year, and gained 16 back! What got me started rolling again was posting on the accountability thread what I was going to eat TOMORROW the night before. I also started taking food with me when I went out so I had something low cal to munch instead of having to pass McDonalds when I was hungry and go without. But that's just me. So far though, I have lost nearly 8 of the 16 gained and I only started on Nov 27.

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Old 12-14-2014, 08:43 PM   #5  
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What was your previous secret to success??

For me, I would need some time (~3 days) of no socializing to get back into the swing of things. I'm all-or-nothing, so some things are off limits (alcohol, processed foods from boxes or cans, soda, juice, sweets). I also have small, cup-size plasticware that I use all the time. Anything tempting (dates) gets doled out in 100 or 200 calorie portion sizes. For the parties coming up, I plan to keep some tea bags with me and nurse a nice cup of hot, cinnamon-y tea while I focus on the chit-chat.

I agree with the planners. Go out and buy several days worth of on-plan items. Whatever plan you're on. Ya gotta WONT this, babeee. I think you can I think you can
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Old 12-14-2014, 09:29 PM   #6  
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I have done some planning but then it seems that someone always comes around with some sort of goodie that's not on my list then all the planning goes out the window.
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Old 12-14-2014, 09:35 PM   #7  
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As far as my previous secret it was just the fact that I come across a new way (app)to count calories and I embraced it. I did really well. I stayed within calories and I even went to bed hungry a lot just so I would not go over limit. After a death in the family I just didn't really care and of course there was food everywhere.....then the holidays set in and so on. I just cant seem to get myself back on tract. Almost as though I cant control it. I don't know.....just wanted to see what other people did in these situations to get back on tract.
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Old 12-15-2014, 07:06 AM   #8  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by dms6k View Post
I did really well. I stayed within calories and I even went to bed hungry a lot just so I would not go over limit. After a death in the family I just didn't really care and of course there was food everywhere.....then the holidays set in and so on. I just cant seem to get myself back on tract. Almost as though I cant control it. I don't know.....just wanted to see what other people did in these situations to get back on tract.
There is no track. You didn't fall off any wagon. The diet failed you, you did not fail yourself.

I find these posts heartbreaking, truly. Everyday someone comes here and posts "I lost XX lbs, I was really good! Now I gained back XXlbs, now I'm really bad!" and it's nonsense in my opinion. Losing weight does not mean you were good and gaining back the weight does not mean you are bad! It's those stupid diets that made you gain the weight back.

You went to bed hungry how many times? You think your body isn't going to punish you for depriving yourself of what it's asking for? Did you think you were being virtuous? Well your body perceives that as cruelty. Gaining the weight back after a little bit of deprivation is your body's way of telling you that your diet ain't jive!

With all the definitive research on the abysmal failure of all diets out there it's a wonder why anyone embarks on this type of torture. Not only do diets fail consistently but they are PROVEN to cause additional weight gain. This wreaks havoc on your metabolism, your heart, and is the root cause of disordered eating.

Your pattern fits the bill with the tragic failure of dieting:

1. You resolve to be "good"
2. You prescribe to some diet and stay within the confines of it even if it means you have to be hungry at times. You override your body's own needs and ignore the signals of hunger. Basically you don't trust your body, you trust the diet more.
3. You're doing well, weight is falling off, you're a little hungry, your cravings are a bit intense but you ignore them. You're proud of your resolve.
4. And then it happens. An event that causes you to release yourself from the strictness of the diet. You got into a fight with someone. Someone rear ended your car. You found out your SO has cheated on you. You lost your job. There was a death in the family. Some sort of event has interfered with your ability to focus on your prescribed diet.
5. You resort to eating, which has provided so much emotional relief in the past. You reach for the exact "bad" foods you deprived yourself of for so long. The floodgates are open, you can't control yourself anymore around this food. You may as well eat everything in sight because "tomorrow this food will be off limits again" so you better eat it while you can. There's no stopping now. This may go on for days, weeks, months.
6. Now you're reeling from this apparent failure and blaming yourself for it when it was the diet that set up this pattern in the first place. Deprivation is not something to mess around with, look around you - the more people diet the more they are obsessed with food, the more weight they gain. It's painfully obvious once you step back and observe the effects of diets in others and in yourself.
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Old 12-15-2014, 05:56 PM   #9  
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Wow...never thought of it that way. Thank you!!

Now I have to ask, what is the best way to go about getting off the rest of this weight off. I wish to lose about 50-60 pounds but honestly my first goal is to lose 20 pounds then focus on another 20 and so on. I have been told I have to eat xxx amount of calories but it seems I am really struggling with that but I was told there is no other way.....calories in vs. calories out. And yes...my mind is on food EVERY second of the day. I do not want to obsess like this.

Any suggestions for a "plan"??
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Old 12-15-2014, 06:48 PM   #10  
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Originally Posted by dms6k View Post
Wow...never thought of it that way. Thank you!!

Now I have to ask, what is the best way to go about getting off the rest of this weight off. I wish to lose about 50-60 pounds but honestly my first goal is to lose 20 pounds then focus on another 20 and so on. I have been told I have to eat xxx amount of calories but it seems I am really struggling with that but I was told there is no other way.....calories in vs. calories out. And yes...my mind is on food EVERY second of the day. I do not want to obsess like this.

Any suggestions for a "plan"??
The nugget of truth here is that calories in and calories out is not a real plan. As I stated before, when you try to control your food you obsess about it more and more. The "plan" I follow is not a diet, but instead I just eat whatever I want whenever I want it with the process of Intuitive Eating. It's not a diet, but it has really helped me stop binging and obsessing over food. It's a very slow process but so far I've lost 20lbs in 10 months just by eating whatever I want in an intuitive way. It goes slow but it at least it goes... but more importantly it doesn't come back. This is the longest I've ever kept 20lbs off and I'm willing to bet money on the fact that it's not piling on again. I know this because I'm still eating what I want and feel no pressure to diet. This may not be the right path for you because it's much more hard work than dieting, but it has the benefit of not regaining weight.

I found this video to be a good introduction to hunger directed eating or "IE" https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wPcySDVHMzg

Last edited by Palestrina; 12-15-2014 at 06:49 PM.
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Old 12-15-2014, 07:08 PM   #11  
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Originally Posted by dms6k View Post
As far as my previous secret it was just the fact that I come across a new way (app)to count calories and I embraced it. I did really well. I stayed within calories and I even went to bed hungry a lot just so I would not go over limit. After a death in the family I just didn't really care and of course there was food everywhere.....then the holidays set in and so on. I just cant seem to get myself back on tract. Almost as though I cant control it. I don't know.....just wanted to see what other people did in these situations to get back on tract.
This is where rewarding myself for logging helps me a lot.

If I want to overeat or if I'm surrounded by food, it's alright. I can overeat. All I have to do is log it to "keep on track" and be eligible for a reward from myself. I'm not always completely in control of what I eat, because I'm not in control of what I want. But one thing I can always control is logging.

When I log my calories I can always see how much I've eaten. I try my best to be realistic with myself, and accurate when I'm logging. I don't beat myself up about going over the line and into the red. I just accept it for what it is. But it helps because I can think about how I felt eating that much extra, and how I feel eating less, and I can see what effect it has on me (I don't mean my weight, but rather my mood and other factors).

And of course, when you see a bunch of red lines after a few days of overeating, it helps you put your feelings of hunger in perspective a bit. That definitely makes me want to eat less for a day and give my system a break!

Last edited by faiora; 12-15-2014 at 07:09 PM.
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