Yogini99 - thank you so much. That was very kind.

And RadioJane you made me laugh out loud!

I am so very, very happy to see your name, Melissa. Welcome back. You were missed.

I've had a very rough winter too and am trying to admit to myself I've regained half of what I had lost. There's definitely a fall from grace feeling, isn't there? I was SO confident I had hit my stride and had finally learned enough behaviors that "never again" would I see above X - and I remember that feeling of hubris very clearly still, while I stare at the scale, mystified. I've planned to do a post-mortem today of the last six months as a way of kicking off a renewed approach -- if I don't spend some time mulling over the specifics of how I slowly went astray, and contemplating future alternatives, I know I'll do it again.

Many hugs sent your way. Just glad you're back.

Oh Melissa . . . I'd been wondering about you. I'm sorry to hear that depression and other issues took their toll, but it's good to have you back!

Regains happen to the best of us; the important thing is that you've caught yourself. You can make this better! And you're an inspiration regardless of what you had to go through, as you've come back to own this.

Melissa I'm SO SOOOO HAPPY to see you back!! (((HUGS))) I've always wondered where you went when you stopped posting and how things were going for you and your family....so glad to have you back here Yours was the first thread I clicked on because I saw your name today

It's great to know we'll be seeing the supportive posts of berryblondeboys, Melissa.

And I'm absolutely delighted to know that "You're no Tiger Woods" without needing to figure out what that might mean, LOL.

Wow... you all know how to make a gal feel good. I needed that. So I thank you from the bottom of my heart.

I have to decide what battles I want to attack first. Well, first is getting my blood pressure down to safe levels. And getting my blood work done so I can get my thyroid back in line.


And then I'll have to see how I feel. Right now I feel lethargic, but if my thyroid isn't working (which I know it's not) then that needs to get going. I think I'll start walking for exercise and maybe swimming. I have some injuries and aches and pains that are impeding a lot of things that I'll have to work around - but those activities should be OK soon enough. Diet will probably fall into line once I start moving and start feeling better too.

This exactly; I've always loved to read your posts and have missed your enthusiasm. Depression is a real beast that a lot of us deal with, trying to not let the abyss pull us back in - good for you fighting back!

Welcome back Melissa; it's so good to see you again!

On the topic of thyroid, I couldn't BELIEVE how much better I felt even two days after dosing to get my levels closer to normal. Like I knew I was fatigued and blah, but I hadn't realized the depth of the lethargy and brain fog until it lifted, and then it was just scary to look back on it.

My motto with weight is that if we never give up, we cannot fail. It's a lifelong road and has uphill and downhill portions, just like anything. But no need to drive your car off the cliff just because the road you've traveled was challenging and you're weary of going forward, right? To strain the clichéd metophor even further, you never know what beautiful country might be around the next bend, if you give up in the rough terrain.

All that to say, you know I'm cheering for you, and you'll get no condemnation from a bunch of fat chicks and dudes who are fighting the the same battle in their own life to overcome their circumstances, biology, and emotions so that they can be as healthy as possible. We all have our own specific issues, but everyone and I do mean EVERYONE has ups and downs. Just read the last seven or eight blog entries of mine for a vivid demonstration of that. Even after hitting my lowest weight since childhood I am still battling with a rough patch and trying desperately, to figure out what works. I'm not quitting though, not ever. Even when it's really, really hard.

Hugs!

Welcome back, reading your message I read ' or be a hatter ' and I thought why would we be as mad as a hatter? then I saw it was hater. That isn't a nice word and my mind didn't read it. Anyway, welcome again.

Welcome back Melissa! I was also gone for quite some time and I just returned to the site a few days ago. I always liked your view on life, so looking forward to reading your future posts!

Hi Melissa!

I relate so much to your posts and blog. Thank you for sharing your deepest feelings.

I also suffer from depression so your posts are extremely helpful to me.

I am sending you hugs and wishing you the very best.

Welcome back, Melissa. I always loved reading your posts and I'm happy to see that you'll be joining us again. I'm sure that you'll get back in the groove in no time.

Again, thank you all so much. The admitting there is a problem and facing the problem is the hardest part. I've done that... and now it's time to work.

Just back from the vampire for all the blood work so I can get all my health stuff back on track.

It's great to see you posting again. Sending you tons of support and encouragement. Your "to-do list" sounds very doable and I look forward to reading your posts regularly again!