This one was said by my orthopedic surgeon, in regards to my knee surgery "after your surgery we'll put you on aspirin, you're a big girl and you've got a high risk factor for clots because of that"
The second is what hurt me most. My mother in law said it to me, to be hurtful, because she was having a bad day. This was said during the time we stayed with her briefly after my accident. "NO, don't f***ing sit in that chair, YOU'LL BREAK IT!!!".
The chair I sat on, is the same chair that her 350lb husband sits in for dinner, and at the time I was 240.
I know she said it for the specific purpose of hurting me, but it still really messed with me. I decided that I'd make sure neither she nor anyone else could ever say ANYTHING close to that to me ever again.
I was embarrassed after two separate people asked if I was pregnant because of my fat stomach. I was also aware that if I kept going, gaining weight, I'd have that much more to lose and it was getting harder and harder to try to make myself start or I'd start and lose and gain it back. So finally I just started WW again, cut out all the sweets and junk and fast food and a two kg weight loss in the first week made me motivated enough not to look back. I am now almost to goal, I fit into my old clothes and I'm enjoying being thin again.
My moment occurred in the beginning of 2012. It was triggered by something very simple... getting out of bed. Now, I've been fat/overweight/obese everyday of my life since the age of 8. That's over 20 years of being the biggest person in the room. But I was kind of used to it. And I always told myself that I wasn't *that* fat, or that I'd never get to XXX weight.
What you said about being the heaviest person in the room... I have found myself doing that for a while, looking without even realizing it to see if anyone was bigger than me, like somehow if I wasn't the biggest one, I would be more comfortable. Didn't change my weight, but somehow it comforted me if I wasn't.
I'm sorry that was such an uncomfortable trip for you. But if it helps at all, in cultures like Vietnam it is not necessarily insulting or taboo to mention people's weights. Your cooking instructor may not have meant to be rude. Regardless, it's not fun. .
Thanks :-) I feel sure the people were not intending to be rude at all. I think it was a novelty and and curiosity to many. One lady asked me how rich I was, "cause you eat much". To be fair, my very light complexion was commented on a lot as well, but of course that did not bother me. The comments about my weight did because I was ashamed of it :-(
For me it was a number of things really that had been lingering somewhere in the background for quite some time. You know that infamous "Someday" list? Those kind of things (and some of a more "serious" nature too, which I'm not ready to publicly admit to. Yet ). So anyway, these "straws" were slowly adding up and by February of 2012 I had a nice little "straw collection", if you can call it that. So if you ask me which one of them was the proverbial straw for me, I couldn't even tell you because they did such a great job at collaborating back then.
If I were to blindly pick one, it would be this:
My brother had started a family a few years earlier. He, my SIL and my first nephew, who was 2 at the time, lived on the other side of the country back then, which meant I didn't get to see them that often. So I was thrilled when they came to stay for a couple of days that February in 2012. We had a great time, lots of fun - and even better: they announced that they were expecting again! Happy days.
And of course I got to play a lot with my nephew. We played tag, hide and seek and all of the other games that active little boys that age love.
Not real "straw" material, right? Yeah, well, only that I couldn't keep up with him. That's right, I couldn't even keep up with a toddler. He was giggling, I was huffing and puffing. He wanted to move on to the next game, I was winded (well, more or less).
That really got me thinking. He's not even 3 years old and I already can't do all the fun stuff I want to do with him. And soon there will be another little one around. Plus, I'm only in my 20's, I want to be a "cool aunt", the fun kind of aunt (yeah, silly, I know...). I guess I just don't want to miss out on anything with these two, not because of my body. At least not if I can help it.
Now add in all of the other "straws" and the fact that I was finally in a place to actively work on my weight issues... And, well, I've always loved traveling, so why not embark on this particular journey?
For me, it was a strange mix of events. In June I got the great news that I hit 5 years of remission from my cancer. But I realized that I wasn't particularly healthy otherwise. I also proceeded to celebrate with lots of food and wine and found myself with another new 15 lbs. So, I now need to take control and at least do my part to ensure my health.
The second is what hurt me most. My mother in law said it to me, to be hurtful, because she was having a bad day. This was said during the time we stayed with her briefly after my accident. "NO, don't f***ing sit in that chair, YOU'LL BREAK IT!!!".
The chair I sat on, is the same chair that her 350lb husband sits in for dinner, and at the time I was 240.
I know she said it for the specific purpose of hurting me, but it still really messed with me. I decided that I'd make sure neither she nor anyone else could ever say ANYTHING close to that to me ever again.
Gah, your story makes me crazy, people are so mean.
But of course what you will find is that when people want to be mean, they find a way to do it, regardless of your weight.
Someone just said to me how much older I look now that I've lost weight. That was their one and only comment about my losing weight -- not congratulations on working so hard, or anything positive. Just that now I really show my age (they know my birthday is next week and, like many women, I'm not terribly thrilled to be getting closer to 50 than to 40). They said it specifically to be hurtful, and it worked -- I felt instantly self conscious, even though I tried hard to let the comment roll off me.
Mean people are mean, so do your best to ignore them (and I'll do my best to ignore them also!)!
You would think tipping the scales at nearly 300 lbs would have been the last straw but nooo. Plenty of horrid, humiliating things have happened to me on account of my weight but none of them propelled me to action. When I decided to get serious about this it wasn't some huge revelation or epiphany. I just felt like....I've had enough of being fat. That part of my life is over. Time to start a new chapter.
Wow, this is a great thread that maybe we should all write in and reread.
Years ago, I got my first desk job. It was terribly boring and isolating. It was after a burnout and dropout from school. I joined 3FC and started learning about calories, nutrition, cooking. I started to realize the depth of my reliance on food for stress eating, especially when I started studying again a year later.
In 2010 I counted calories and started running. In a few months I lost 10lbs, I looked great (didn't think so at the time, though) but I succeeded only because I got obsessed with counting every bite and every step.
Everytime I decide to "go", its usually because I hate the way I look and feel. I realise my weight is so tied in with my anxiety. My weight is probably always going to yoyo while I struggle to balance my mental health during different times. This is a "whole health" journey, something I'll have to work on forever to make sure it doesn't get too out of hand.
For me there were two very recent events...and yet another last night.
- July 3rd, I fell down my front steps on my way to work. In truth, not sure it really had anything to do with my weight because my foot slipped out of my ADORABLE mules mid-stride. But, I broke both elbows from the hands straight out fall. I received a concussion and the medics had to be called. There in lies the humility. Even in my injured confused state it registered that I was 260 lbs and these guys were going to be lifting me. I was mortified. But, with months of healing without the use of either arm...what could I do.
- September, I was experiencing chest pains deep in my left chest and pain into my L jaw. Working in the medical field, I am admittedly one of the worst patients. Therefore, I waited with the pain for 14 hours before telling anyone. My PCP sent me directly to the ER. During my 6 hours of testing and treatment, the only thing I could think about was " This is because I am fat". The good news is my heart is healthy and all of my basic labs are good as well. Given my family history...I am a healthy fat girl. But, it was the real straw. My hubby is morbidly obese too. We made a decision...WE ARE DONE!
So on 9/18, he began the Ideal Protein plan and I began an alternative IP. It costs way too much for us both to do the official IP. But with my hubby being over 300 and on several meds I felt he needed the 1:1 support most.
To date, he has lost 29 lbs and I am at 25 down! So we are both feeling better. And then last night, at our son's last home game as a senior - I slipped and fell down a couple stadium stairs. I caught myself with my right knee and unfortunately, with my left arm...this arm is the one with a mal-union of the bone from the July fall. It hurts like a bugger and I am pretty sure it is re-injured and I may have just bought that surgery I was avoiding.
But, I will keep on keeping on with my journey to a more fit me!
Last edited by BuffieLynn; 10-19-2013 at 03:00 PM.
If it's any consolation BuffieLynn, I was all over the place doing "yard sales" as I lost weight. For me, my brain thought my center of gravity was my heavier weight and took time to catch up. So I was tripping up all the time. The worst was when playing tennis. I ran for the ball, flipped in the air and landed hard. So take things easy until your brain catches up. It might take some time!!
But if it helps at all, in cultures like Vietnam it is not necessarily insulting or taboo to mention people's weights. Your cooking instructor may not have meant to be rude. Regardless, it's not fun. 
.
). So anyway, these "straws" were slowly adding up and by February of 2012 I had a nice little "straw collection", if you can call it that. So if you ask me which one of them was the proverbial straw for me, I couldn't even tell you because they did such a great job at collaborating back then.
