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-   -   Reaching out for help.. (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/weight-loss-support/276623-reaching-out-help.html)

sassyangies 02-27-2013 10:28 PM

Reaching out for help..
I'm having a hard time forgiving myself. I've been counting calories and doing very well since January 1st. I started at 310 and currently I am at 284. I did hit 281, but we went out of town on a little vaca and I didn't count calories, but there's no way I ate that much. I still watched what I ate. I know that gaining 3 pounds could be anything, but in my mind I screwed up and I'm having a hard time getting back on track. It was only 2 days.

So my question is when you guys feel like your getting off track or about to lose control. What do you do? What are some things that help you? I know it's not always easy and I get that, but I just need some help getting back on track before I gain anymore weight back.

Im so frustrated!!:(

coffeeshopgirl 02-27-2013 10:37 PM

hi sassyangies!

To answer your question, the first thing I do is come onto 3FC and see if anyone else is having similar issues. More times than not, someone can relate to my situation and the emotions that come with it.

The second thing I do is forgive myself. For what? For not eating perfectly, for not sticking with it perfectly, for not exercising until I pass out. Generally for thinking with my perfectionist mentality. Once I forgive myself for not sticking to plan, the rest is easier.

I start with the easier, most enjoyable thing about my weight loss routine. Usually, this is prepping food because I love food, haha. Secondly, I make myself do a short workout and if I feel ok I repeat the workout because I start with a low intensity. The next day I bump up the intensity.

I slowly - and guilt free - get back onto my routine. You hit the nail on the head with the forgiveness part - and it seems like you didn't really indulge. So, tomorrow is another day. Get started on the good decisions and smile while you're doing it.

The journey is challenging, but not impossible. *sending thoughts of encouragement your way*

Fluffypuppy 02-28-2013 12:53 AM

Like Coffeeshopgirl said--perfectionism. That is the enemy. I remind myself that it is the average of my eating and exercise that is going to matter, not the one day of extra activity or the two days of overeating. You might find that that weight you gained comes off really easily. The little spikes can be like that. If you didn't really eat enough for it to be fat, like you said, could be anything and may resolve itself. I try to weigh myself right after a slip and then put in a quality five days or so before I weigh again, but some people stay more focused if they weigh more often. I like weighing every week or so so that I don't get down about the inevitable fluctuations which may be all this is. Keep going! Think small picture, one meal at a time, or big picture, one vacation does not define your efforts. each works in different ways for different people. Find what works for you. And congrats on your losses so far!

bubblybarrister 02-28-2013 07:55 AM

I so relate to you! I went away last weekend and came back 2.2 lbs heaver! I am also a big calorie counter but knew that there was no way I could accurately estimate what I was taking in last weekend. I cope with those days by getting back on the wagon - making sure I do some cardio, drinking lottttts of water, and trying to limit my carb intake (since carbs can hold onto more water). It took me almost all week to get back to where I was, but now I'll start recording my measurements again!

I think as long as you don't use one bad eating weekend as a reason to just give up and go crazy with it (I mean, I indulged, but not ridiculously so), you'll be okay. I hope that helps! *hugs*

Roo2 02-28-2013 08:41 AM

I have an honest conversation with myself.:hug:
Go over my plan to see if it realistic.
Admit my failure ...learn from my mistakes...and move on!

I am a firm believer that we don't really learn from others mistakes!:dizzy:
It's like driving by a crash ,we glance over say how horrible and proceed with our own life.

I truly believe when we make mistakes .. And learn from them we grow so much
And it makes us realize what we find acceptable and is the stimulus for change.:carrot:

I don't believe in wallowing in my mistakes ...Acknowledge it,Learn from it...And
Move On!:carrot:
You cannot Unring a Bell ...but you can have a Do Over!:D
Remember every new day is a fresh start ...don't live in the past embrace the present!:hug:

cestlavie22 02-28-2013 09:08 AM

the most helpful thing i've read is:

if you break a china cup, do you then go and trash the whole rest of the set? or

If you trip on a step, do you then throw yourself down the stairs?

No, you clean up the china or get back up and keep going!

ichoose2believe 02-28-2013 09:27 AM


Originally Posted by cestlavie22 (Post 4649577)
the most helpful thing i've read is:

if you break a china cup, do you then go and trash the whole rest of the set? or

If you trip on a step, do you then throw yourself down the stairs?

No, you clean up the china or get back up and keep going!

:cp: this 100%

elvislover324 02-28-2013 10:16 AM

I don't think your 3lbs is a screw-up! It could just be water retention from salt, hormones, anything!

We all have times like you do and as long as we get back on track, we are winning the battle.

The best thing that you did was come here and ask for help. We might not have the answers but we are here to pull you through.:hug:

When I think (or do) go off track whether it's with food or mentally, 3FC has been my saving grace. It's like you are all my teammates and we are winning this game! I read about other's struggles, I read the NSV threads, I read and look at the mini-goal pictures.

I don't know if any of the things that work for me might help you but I wanted to post so you know you aren't alone. :)

Edited to add: Before I forgot to note-----you are down 26lbs!!! Let's not forget to celebrate that too!! :cp::cp::cp:

changeforme 02-28-2013 10:31 AM

yep, just like everyone else said - it's not about being perfect, it's about being persistent :hug:

sassyangies 02-28-2013 10:33 AM

Thank you so much guys. I wrote that and went to bed shortly after. I just needed to forget about it. Thank you so much for your encouraging words. My mind is slipping and I needed to do something to get back into the mindset of I can do this. I really needed to hear these things and I'm hoping today a trip to my favorite store for my produce will get me going again so I can come home and make myself a delicious healthy lunch.

:) I'm happy that I can come here and just say what I'm feeling. You guys rock!!

KateB 02-28-2013 01:14 PM

I think the most import thing I have learned in life is, "You can't change the past". It's done, over finished kaput! So don't agonize, stress or beat yourself up over. Yiou can laern from it, you have control over your future. Start fresh RIGHT NOW. If you had carmel roll for breakfast, so what. Have a healthy on plan lunch and dinner and keep moving forward.

Persistance over perfection!

ArtyKay 02-28-2013 02:09 PM

Everybody's given great advice. Just wanted to say I know how you feel and I know you can do it! (((bighugs)))

sassyangies 02-28-2013 10:23 PM

Thankyou for the support guys. I really feel like i've had a good day and I am ready to move on. Work for the next 3 days so I'm excited to just be out of the house and not have to cook or think about it too much for the weekend.

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