So, Iíve got this co-worker that I have been friends with going on two years now. We decided to partner up for some weight loss back in March-April 2012. We were doing pretty good until we were derailed by our respective vacations that year (OBX and Disneyland). We thought we could enjoy our vacations and get back on the wagon once we were home. Yeah, didnít pan out as weíd hoped :P
January 2nd we jumped back on the wagon. I was doing excellent until Sunday the 6th when I introduced whole wheat bread products back into my diet (didnít think anything of it at the time). Did not go well. Ended up splurging that night. I felt guilty, but resolved to do better on Monday.
Well Monday I had pitas for lunch and a roll when I got home. Ended up splurging again. I figured out it was the bread. I felt like a crack addict. About half an hour after I ate that roll I got crazy cravings. I couldnít stop thinking about eating another roll or getting some candy. I felt anxious. Couldnít concentrate on anything but food. I even stood in front of the refrigerator arguing with myself - ďNo donít do it, youíre still within your calorie limit!Ē, ďGo a head, eat it, you can make up for it laterĒ, ďJust walk away! What are you doing!Ē
Insanity! But lessoned learned. This stuff only seems to happen when I eat bread. So no more bread. Iím going to add it to the list of trigger foods I canít keep in the house: bread, kashi bars, granola bars, fruit snacks, candy, junk, and crackers of any kind.
So I tell my co-worker today about what happened last night. In so many words he tells me Iím weak and that by cutting trigger foods out of my life I am giving up. I should eat them and keep them around and just learn to build up my will power. He is all about conquering temptation instead of avoiding it.
I explain that this isnít a will power thing. If I eat anything off my trigger list (even in moderation) I then canít stop thinking about it. I have to have more. I justify eating more. The minute I have more I feel better, the anxiety goes away, I can think again. I donít feel guilty. I feel relieved. Then the cravings start again and the cycle is repeated. It literally feels like an addiction.
He blows me off and says again that I need to learn willpower. I should buy my trigger foods, divvy them out, and tell myself only one a day. I tell him heís not understanding me. Iím not going to spend all day fighting insane cravings in hopes of creating will power. Iím not going to set myself up for failure by having junk in the house. Iíve tried his way in the past and it always, ALWAYS, ends the same Ė splurging. Needless to say he annoyed me and Iíve learned to keep my issues to myself.
Just had to get all that out hahaha.