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Freaking out, afraid I can't do this...

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Old 09-25-2012, 07:23 PM   #1
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Default Freaking out, afraid I can't do this...

Here's the thing. Although not always actively, I have been trying to lose weight for years. When I was in my teens and a tad thinner, I managed to lose a little bit once, maybe 10-12 lbs which was good because I wasn't all that heavy...

Of course I put it all back on plus a lot more... And the past couple of years I have been dieting on and off. We're talking periods of eating waaaay less than what's good, periods of total overeating and some good times in between. A bit of the problem is that when I've had the good periods and sticking to a healthy diet, I've lost maybe 3-4 lbs and then it has just stopped, every time. And those 3-4 lbs has been coming and going and I just don't know how to deal with it...

If you're still with me, I guess my point is that I'm afraid...I'm afraid that I've totally destroyed my metabolism. I'm afraid I just don't have the knowledge I need to lose the weight, even though I feel like I know a lot about the subject. I think I need to change the way I look at things, but I have no idea how...Maybe I just need to break the 3-4 lbs barrier to stay motivated, I don't know... Did anyone feel like this and got out of it? Any advice would be highly appreciated
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Old 09-25-2012, 07:35 PM   #2
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I think most of us have started and stopped and restarted more times than we care to count. There seems to be that magical ah ha moment that finally makes us think that this time it will be different. For me, this time, it was doing it for the right reasons. Doing it out of a place of love and not hate. I had to decide to get healthy because I loved myself. Not because I hated the way I looked or that I had to fit into some sort of box that society says is acceptable.

As for damaging your metabolism, I think you're probably alright. All weight loss is about is calories in vs calories out. Sure some calories are better for you than others but if you are eating less than what you are burning your weight loss will be inevitable. Good luck!
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Old 09-25-2012, 07:43 PM   #3
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Welcome!

I'm certain you have not ruined your metabolism. Many many many of us have yo-yo'ed several times and have still been successful!

The key is persistence. Easier said than done, I know! Well actually there are 2 keys, the 2nd being, believing in yourself. You CAN do it, there's no doubt about that at all.

When you lose those 3-4 pounds, then it stops, how long are we talking? A week? 2 weeks? Longer?

Unless you have some medical condition that complicates things, if you are in a calorie deficit you WILL lose weight. The scale doesn't always reflect the fat loss when you think it should. And believe me, I know it can be incredibly frustrating!!!

Stick around here, research, try different things; you will find what works for you. Just keep working at it and never give up!!! And tell that fear to shove it, because you absolutely can be successful!!!
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Old 09-25-2012, 07:46 PM   #4
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Indeed, everyone's probably been there. I know I have. It just feels like it's never gonna happen, even though you know how to do it.
You just gotta start. I don't know precisely what motivated me into it, but I've developed a habit of running. I run more or less 5 times a week for around 30 minutes, and now I've started calorie counting as well, and I'm starting to do it. You can't deprive yourself of food, but you can't stuff yourself either. For me, I've been sticking with 1500 calories a day, and it's working. As long as I keep up with it, and I will for sure this time, then I'll get there.
You'll have to be patient. It's not something that'll happen overnight, you need to develop that habit, and then wait. Keep with the habit of course, but you're not gonna lose 10 pounds a week, no matter how good. Just gotta be patient...
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Old 09-25-2012, 07:47 PM   #5
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Thank you, that made me feel a little bit better

I do also get what you're saying about doing it for the right reasons. This time I'm consentrating about all the things I can do, all the clothes I can wear etc. when I reach my goal, instead of what I can't do or wear or feel like the way I am now. Maybe it will help
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Old 09-25-2012, 07:53 PM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LockItUp View Post
Welcome!

I'm certain you have not ruined your metabolism. Many many many of us have yo-yo'ed several times and have still been successful!

The key is persistence. Easier said than done, I know! Well actually there are 2 keys, the 2nd being, believing in yourself. You CAN do it, there's no doubt about that at all.

When you lose those 3-4 pounds, then it stops, how long are we talking? A week? 2 weeks? Longer?

Unless you have some medical condition that complicates things, if you are in a calorie deficit you WILL lose weight. The scale doesn't always reflect the fat loss when you think it should. And believe me, I know it can be incredibly frustrating!!!

Stick around here, research, try different things; you will find what works for you. Just keep working at it and never give up!!! And tell that fear to shove it, because you absolutely can be successful!!!
A lot of good points

Usually it takes about a month or two before I give up after it stops. All motivation disappears and I just can't stick to it anymore without getting extremely frustrated.. weird, lol.
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Old 09-25-2012, 07:53 PM   #7
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Hi Em!
Don't freak out, your metabolism can be repaired, I think if you can focus as Lambie says on the health aspects, you'll be fine. And one more thing, if you fall off the proverbial wagon, you can climb back on, there's no limit on the number of times you can try and get fit and healthy.

There have been times I made lame attempts at losing, and now this time, it just clicked. I'm using bits and pieces of all the programs I've tried over the years, you can only find what works for you if you try different things.

What clicked for me is what we laughingly call, "more veg", saw a movie called fat sick and nearly dead, he did a juice fast, not what I'm recommending at all, but there's alot of stuff in the movie about the nutrients and micronutrients in vegetables, so we started eating more veggies.

then saw a few articles, one in particular was about women losing weight in their forties and beyond and one of the things they talked about was eating more vegetables, they said half or 3/4 of your plate should be vegetables. That may seem overwhelming, but if you just try and eat more fruits and veggies than you are now, it's not such a big task.

Also, I highly recommend some kind of activity, if you can, a slow walk, maybe park further from the door at the store or mall, there's a show on pbs where they do exercises from a chair, it might seem silly to wave your arms around while you're watching tv, but if it burns a few calories, why not?!

And finally, but the bestest thing you can do is check out different forums and threads on this site, there are so many different things people are doing to lose weight, stay motivated, get healthy, etc. so many resources here in one place it boggles the mind.

Best of luck to you, don't quit and if you have to quit, try again another time, you're worth it!
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Old 09-25-2012, 07:57 PM   #8
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Spiritix View Post
Indeed, everyone's probably been there. I know I have. It just feels like it's never gonna happen, even though you know how to do it.
You just gotta start. I don't know precisely what motivated me into it, but I've developed a habit of running. I run more or less 5 times a week for around 30 minutes, and now I've started calorie counting as well, and I'm starting to do it. You can't deprive yourself of food, but you can't stuff yourself either. For me, I've been sticking with 1500 calories a day, and it's working. As long as I keep up with it, and I will for sure this time, then I'll get there.
You'll have to be patient. It's not something that'll happen overnight, you need to develop that habit, and then wait. Keep with the habit of course, but you're not gonna lose 10 pounds a week, no matter how good. Just gotta be patient...
Exactly... Trying so hard to be patient this time. I really don't know how it's going this time though, As the famous 4 lbs are gone so far as of last friday, and I can't weigh in more than once a week without getting some sort of obsession with the numbers.
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Old 09-25-2012, 08:13 PM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kelijpa View Post
Hi Em!
Don't freak out, your metabolism can be repaired, I think if you can focus as Lambie says on the health aspects, you'll be fine. And one more thing, if you fall off the proverbial wagon, you can climb back on, there's no limit on the number of times you can try and get fit and healthy.

There have been times I made lame attempts at losing, and now this time, it just clicked. I'm using bits and pieces of all the programs I've tried over the years, you can only find what works for you if you try different things.

What clicked for me is what we laughingly call, "more veg", saw a movie called fat sick and nearly dead, he did a juice fast, not what I'm recommending at all, but there's alot of stuff in the movie about the nutrients and micronutrients in vegetables, so we started eating more veggies.

then saw a few articles, one in particular was about women losing weight in their forties and beyond and one of the things they talked about was eating more vegetables, they said half or 3/4 of your plate should be vegetables. That may seem overwhelming, but if you just try and eat more fruits and veggies than you are now, it's not such a big task.

Also, I highly recommend some kind of activity, if you can, a slow walk, maybe park further from the door at the store or mall, there's a show on pbs where they do exercises from a chair, it might seem silly to wave your arms around while you're watching tv, but if it burns a few calories, why not?!

And finally, but the bestest thing you can do is check out different forums and threads on this site, there are so many different things people are doing to lose weight, stay motivated, get healthy, etc. so many resources here in one place it boggles the mind.

Best of luck to you, don't quit and if you have to quit, try again another time, you're worth it!
Thank you

I do try to stay active, by taking walks, going to the gym, playing on my wii or just simply cleaning up and doing things around the house. I can't sit on the couch all day anymore, that would drive me nuts

This site is great and I think I've found the right place to hang out online
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Old 09-25-2012, 08:25 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Em Coconut View Post
Here's the thing. Although not always actively, I have been trying to lose weight for years. When I was in my teens and a tad thinner, I managed to lose a little bit once, maybe 10-12 lbs which was good because I wasn't all that heavy...

Of course I put it all back on plus a lot more... And the past couple of years I have been dieting on and off. We're talking periods of eating waaaay less than what's good, periods of total overeating and some good times in between. A bit of the problem is that when I've had the good periods and sticking to a healthy diet, I've lost maybe 3-4 lbs and then it has just stopped, every time. And those 3-4 lbs has been coming and going and I just don't know how to deal with it...

If you're still with me, I guess my point is that I'm afraid...I'm afraid that I've totally destroyed my metabolism. I'm afraid I just don't have the knowledge I need to lose the weight, even though I feel like I know a lot about the subject. I think I need to change the way I look at things, but I have no idea how...Maybe I just need to break the 3-4 lbs barrier to stay motivated, I don't know... Did anyone feel like this and got out of it? Any advice would be highly appreciated
I have joined WW so many times they need me to be a spokesperson & attend for FREE. If i can still lose weight anyone can my middle name is yo yo . I have lost & gained about 4 very large people in my life. Take a deep breath & FOCUS you can do this


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Old 09-25-2012, 08:35 PM   #11
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You've gotten some wonderful suggestions so far, so I'd just like to throw my 2 cents in and agree that I've been there too and know where you're coming from. My highest weight was 160 right after college, and moving from the midwest to Colorado really kickstarted me to eat healthier and be more active, just being surrounded by the lifestyle here. But the past 5 years, I've been yo-yo-ing the same 10-15 lbs over and over again.

I think motivating yourself to find exercises you really enjoy is important, and it sounds like you have found some such activities. Also, be very honest with yourself about why you overeat. If you can identify the root cause of the problem, you'll be more successful in the long term.

And keep posting! Having a support group is very important. I don't have anyone in my life that is supportive of my dieting, and having that from this site has been soooo important.
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Old 09-25-2012, 08:38 PM   #12
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Originally Posted by atmos View Post
You've gotten some wonderful suggestions so far, so I'd just like to throw my 2 cents in and agree that I've been there too and know where you're coming from. My highest weight was 160 right after college, and moving from the midwest to Colorado really kickstarted me to eat healthier and be more active, just being surrounded by the lifestyle here. But the past 5 years, I've been yo-yo-ing the same 10-15 lbs over and over again.

I think motivating yourself to find exercises you really enjoy is important, and it sounds like you have found some such activities. Also, be very honest with yourself about why you overeat. If you can identify the root cause of the problem, you'll be more successful in the long term.

And keep posting! Having a support group is very important. I don't have anyone in my life that is supportive of my dieting, and having that from this site has been soooo important.
YES YES YES ! well said

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Old 09-25-2012, 08:50 PM   #13
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I really do think we've all been there. I've done exactly what you've done in the past as well. Lost a few pounds, it slows down or you think, I can get away with this, and that. Next thing you know you've thrown off and gotta start all over and all frustrated.
I agree with something I read above. there is this ah ha! moment and everything is different. I believe that I have had that moment. I am trying my hardest because i want to be healthy and because i want to be healthy and active for my daughter and show her a good example. You have to have the right reasons and the right mindset. I have never been this dedicated. I spend every night researching and looking up weight loss tips and reading the forums.
You need a little bit of motivation and some love for yourself and the rest will fall into place.
My recommendation, count your calories or forcus on whatever your plan is. Have motivational photos, whether its a picture of u before where u wanna be. something from now that you dont wanna look like, and for me I also make sure i look at pictures of my daughter as she is my biggest motivation.
And just take one day at a time and dont beat urself up if you have a bad day or week. just keep going and push on.
I have just restarted a week ago yesterday. But this time feels differnt. And I am planning to make sure that im right.
Good luck!!!
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Old 09-25-2012, 10:00 PM   #14
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The odds that you've damaged your metabolism are exceedingly low. Possible but not likely. You're not special. (No offense) The government isn't interested in studying your body because it isn't turning sunshine into useable energy.

You need to find a way of eating that you can live with over the long term. In the meanwhile count calories or eat paleo. You'll lose weight, guarenteed.

Keep reading - but be careful where you're reading. Lucky you this forum is full of smart people who know their stuff.
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Old 09-26-2012, 07:16 AM   #15
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Thank you all for great words. I feel a lot better now. I know I have a tendency to worry too much about things. I'm just gonna stick with counting my calories and not give up, and I'm sure I'll get where I wanna be eventually.
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