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Old 07-24-2012, 05:46 AM   #16  
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Low self esteem,
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"YOU'RE FAT ANYWAY" :|

Using it as a release like someone would drink every so often because they don't have a healthy way of relieving pent up stress and emotional anguish.
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Old 07-24-2012, 01:16 PM   #17  
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Quoting Twin:

"I found another thing to be interested in and it required my time and energy".

Bingo! For me, the whole weight loss thing requires ALL of my time and energy. There is no room for anything else. Unfortunately, life happens and I get distracted. A dilemma; I want to lose weight and be healthy, but I want to have a life, too. I would guess that those who are sucessful at the weight loss/getting healthy find a way to integrate the two.
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Old 07-26-2012, 06:37 AM   #18  
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I think I pretty much know the 3 things I tell myself when I sabotage...

1) "oh this meal won't make me gain back that much weight"

2) "it's okay tomorrow I'll get back on track, I'll enjoy myself today"

3) and yes sometimes I just get so tired of always caring about my weight and how I look that I just say "ugh whatever"
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Old 07-26-2012, 06:42 AM   #19  
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I think it's a simple question of short- vs. long-term gratification. We humans are notorious for choosing the former, especially when we're feeling stressed or sad and want to self-soothe.

F.
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Old 07-26-2012, 06:50 AM   #20  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by freelancemomma View Post
I think it's a simple question of short- vs. long-term gratification. We humans are notorious for choosing the former, especially when we're feeling stressed or sad and want to self-soothe.
This is certainly the case for me. I don't believe I have deep-seated psychological reasons for wanting to stop myself losing more weight. Rather, when I go off plan it is simply because constantly exercising the discipline to stay on plan is hard. It requires forgoing the instant, tangible gratification of eating something practically engineered to be tempting and delicious, in favor of the vague, long-term, and incremental (at best) satisfaction of reaching my weight loss goals.

I figured out ways to exercise discipline so that most of the time the long-term goals win out, and doing that for almost 3 years I managed to lose most of the weight I wanted to lose. I still went off plan from time to time though! I just thought of it as an off-plan choice, not something loaded like "self-sabotage".

I binge because it feels good to eat. It is a pleasureable thing to do, while it is happening. I have been binging more lately, it is true, and struggling to get those binges under control. But it isn't because I fear reaching a healthy weight or any reason like that. It is because my life is rocky right now, and my emotional energy is so worn out from that, that I haven't got as much energy left for exercising the necessary discipline to stay on plan.
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Old 07-26-2012, 12:28 PM   #21  
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I have a couple thoughts on this.

One is my husband, who I adore and love very much, is already very insecure. I don't know why, but he is crazy jealous and already thinks there are men just beating down the door to steal me away. Um... yeah, even if that were the case, I'm not available so there is no issue.

Second, one of my best friends is also very overweight. She was snatched off the street at age 10 and sexually assaulted. She told me once that she felt safer when fatter. You never really fear about people abducting fat ladies. They are usually 110 pound women. My Mom used to say the same thing. I would warn her about walking down country roads alone. She would say she is not the type they were going to abduct. My niece is 15 & she always says "Fat kids are harder to kidnap."

I feel safe in my skin I guess. Someone in another thread said that her husband bought her mace because he was suddenly worried about her safety. Someone else said she would be safer now because she could run faster and fight back harder. That made sense and I'm trying to hold onto that.
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Old 09-26-2012, 10:03 AM   #22  
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I've only recently caught myself spontaneously talking back to that voice in my head that wants to go have breakfast no 2 after I just ate a good breakfast. I'm getting really annoyed with the reptilian brain. After the first time I genuinely and spontaneously questioned the binge voice in my head, a little faint light bulb went on. Then I had a tiny aha moment. I don't have to listen to it. It's just stupid.
Have you ever been really sick and tired of someone's antics? That's what it felt like the first time I did it. Like I turned around and said "Ah...no, I don't have to do that. That's kinda dumb."
I think that Brain Over Binge talks about this but honestly it never actually happened as a real experience before. I had bought the book and thrown it away.
I think what was different was the degree to which the compulsion has started to anger me. Yeah...there it is...I'm angry at it and fed up. I also think I've brainwashed myself into thinking I can't do anything about "cravings". For goodness sake, the voice needs your legs and hands.
I have to reread Brain Over Binge. She mentions this but I didn't really get it the first time. I feel like I've conned myself for a very long time in a weird way. Hard to explain.
But I have become uneasy with the idea that "cravings" make me helpless.
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Old 09-26-2012, 11:12 AM   #23  
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Originally Posted by withinmygrasp View Post
But if I have the chance to cheat by eating lots of junk, I do! It's pretty ridiculous actually. I know I am just chasing something but just can't seem to stop within the moment.

It gets so frustrating!

so if you sabotage your own weight loss, why? If you don't, how do you keep control?
OMG ! I soooooo wish I knew why. I've been trying to stay in onederland... so many times I get there but right back up I go. Sometimes I think I can't handle the compliments & the jaw drops when people see me . Yes I do love some attn but not in the excess. Then I think my brain thinks I'm done since I "look so good". That's so not true I have 66 lbs to go this time around . Does this make any sense to anypne ?



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Old 09-26-2012, 11:14 AM   #24  
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I think having a bad day/week or not seeing the results I wanna see for a long time does it for me.

At my last job, every day was a bad day. I was on my way to lose some weight when I started, but with all the bad days I felt bad for and about myself which lead to me eating loads of junk. I gained 25 pounds while I worked there.
Also, when I don't see results for a while, I give up and think that I'll always be fat so what's the point? I'm working hard on these attitudes now, because there is no way I'm planning to fail this time.

Luckily, as long as I'm not feeling horrible I can give into my cravings without overdoing it, not that I give into any craving I get anytime. And cravings don't come that often for me anymore anyway.
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Old 09-26-2012, 11:28 AM   #25  
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Quote:
Originally Posted by kaplods View Post
. . .

Eating trigger foods is like playing with fire - and when you play with fire, you sometimes get burned. . .



Many people (and I'm definitely one of them) find it easier to avoid trigger foods than to eat them moderately. It isn't about sabotage or willpower it's about preventing the lower-brain from getting into the driver's seat.
Me too! And thank you for posting all of that information!

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Originally Posted by alaskanlaughter View Post
i know that i sabotage for a couple of reasons...one is that i struggle to not see food as a reward or a treat...and second i know that i really struggle with the idea of getting skinnier and the possible male attention that it might bring...
I'm struggling with this right now big time. Both things!

Quote:
Originally Posted by Paula Jean View Post
For me it's always when I feel bad about myself and I'll just start eating really crappy and it makes me feel worse, so I continue to do it. Now I'm in the process of learning how to redirect myself when I'm feeling bad, I know I have to get the heck out my apartment, go for a walk, go get my mail, just get away from anywhere near food. It's been hard but so far it's been working.
I related to this as well. I definitely find I kind of punish myself with food.

Quote:
Originally Posted by tinneranne2 View Post
When I'm feeling badly about myself, or feeling upset, I'll eat super-crazy junkfood.

I think "you're a crappy person and you deserve to be fat, so go ahead and shovel it in, piggy."

Bottom line, I've gotta find a new way to respond to emotional stress. Stopping a behavior cold is way harder than just replacing it.
\

Sounds like we have the same inner voice! I struggle with negative self talk, quite a lot, and it's something I'm constantly working on.

Quote:
Originally Posted by swissy View Post
Low self esteem,
not caring
"YOU'RE FAT ANYWAY" :|

Using it as a release like someone would drink every so often because they don't have a healthy way of relieving pent up stress and emotional anguish.
Sounds very familiar!

Quote:
Originally Posted by newjourney2012 View Post
i think i sabotage because i think deep down inside i will fail..
I struggle with these thoughts as well. "You know you're just going to get fat again, like you did before, might as well start now".





There is so much more to getting fat, and losing weight, than just overeating and calorie deficits (at least for most of us). Reading through these posts made me feel very sad that so many of us have such negative thoughts about ourselves.
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