3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support Give and get support here!

Deprivation

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 02-02-2012, 10:37 PM   #1
Senior Member
 
aliasihaya's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Centreville, VA
Posts: 266

S/C/G: 230/see ticker/130

Height: 5'1"

Default Deprivation

I'm trying not to feel as if I'm depriving myself by being on a diet. Because I know that I won't stick to it if I do feel deprived. This has to be a lifestyle change yet I still have this feeling that I'm depriving myself of all of the things that I love to eat.

So I'm a diabetic and therefore am on a low carb diet. I have to stay away from all things carby. I do ok with it as long as I meal plan and have all of my groceries for the week. But some days the cravings just hit me so hard.

So tonight I got back from work at about 7PM. I stopped at the store to pick up something non food related. I decide that I really don't feel like cooking when I get home so I'm going to pick up something quick and easy in the store. I didn't have an idea in my head so I just started going up and down the aisles. And when I'd get to something that I used to eat but shouldn't now I'd stare at it and think about it and then just leave it there. In the end I walked up and down the grocery store aisles for over 30 minutes and couldn't find anything that I wanted to eat that I should eat. I began to feel like everything I looked at was forbidden to me. Even the tv dinners don't cater for low carb eating Now I know that there were some things that I could have eaten. But none of that sounded good or I couldn't think of any ideas. So I get to the last aisle and realize how tired I am of trying to plan a low carb diet That its just exhausting. And I got mad, that I wasn't allowed to have these foods anymore yet everyone else can. And then I felt sad because I just wanted to pick up the same convenience foods that I used to. I felt like huddling in the corner into a ball and just crying.

I just wish this didn't seem so hard. Healthwise it really does make a difference when I do low carb. I can really manage my blood sugar that way. But I just find it so difficult. I'm just getting so tired of focusing on what I should eat all the time. It gets exhausting.

In the end I passed up everything except I went back and got pasta. The regular kind instead of the whole wheat because I don't like the whole wheat. And now after I've eaten the pasta I feel totally guilty. Yet somewhat satisfied because it's taken the edge off of the cravings.

I'm not sure what to do. How can I stop feeling so deprived?
__________________


Sweat Pea from Sucker Punch - "‎Who honors those we love with the very life we live? Who sends monsters to kill us, and at the same time sings that we'll never die? Who teaches us what's real, and how to laugh at lies? Who decides why we live, and what we'll die to defend? Who chains us, and who holds the key to set us free? It's you. You have all the weapons you need. Now fight!"
aliasihaya is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-02-2012, 10:53 PM   #2
Boston Qualifier and MOM
 
ennay's Avatar
 
Join Date: Nov 2006
Location: Oregon
Posts: 5,795

S/C/G: 186/see ticker/?

Height: 5'3.75"

Default

How low carb of a diet are you on? Most diabetics are prescribed a moderate to low carb diet. Which means caution but still wiggle room. The secret is to make the carbs COUNT.

And I know, I know you will be told when you DO have carbs have "the good carbs" but if you are struggling with deprivation, then maybe "the good carbs" are the ones you really WANT rather than the BEST ones.

If you dont like whole wheat pastas try Barilla plus, it has the protein and fiber to slow carb absorption and tastes like white.

I think the key to surviving long term on a lower carb diabetic diet is to PLAN those things. So often the PLANNED food is "perfection" and all excursions are emotional and leave you with this frustration. So instead of inhaling a plate of white pasta after an hour of indecision you will be able to plan a small portion of pasta along with a protein and a veggie or whatever.
__________________
A whole lot of setbacks. Starting over.

My before/after pics
ennay is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-02-2012, 11:09 PM   #3
Senior Member
 
linJber's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2011
Location: NW PA
Posts: 1,609

S/C/G: 255/holding at 162/160

Height: 5'-7"

Default

Well, you have to first change how you think about the foods you used to eat. How about wrap sandwiches? Flat bread rather than regular? Salad with lean meat in it? I cut pasta, rice, potatoes, and bread almost completely out of my diet last January. I never made them at home. I went to dinner at the home of a friend or family member on occasion and if they were having them, I ate a very small portion. Cravings for them went down, and as a bonus, so did sugar cravings.

This is more a mental game than a physical game. I'm not sure who said it, but "If you think you can, you can. If you think you can't, you're right." You can do this. It's hard to plan, but it gets easier. Try to never be without the basics you need to make a meal in a hurry that is on plan. Most of the time I have the same breakfast, so it's always in the house - frozen fruit, 0% fat plain Greek yogurt, high fiber cereal. It's a great breakfast and not a bad lunch. And it works as supper if I need it to. Keep eggs, cooked chicken (freeze left-overs in snack bags for portion control,) salad fixings, fruit, veggies in the house all the time and throw a salad or an omelet together quickly.

I saw a friend of a friend yesterday that I haven't seen in a year. She asked how I lost the weight. I told her I cut out "crap." She then asked if I now could eat "normal" foods. I said I've been eating "normal" foods for the past year. Before that I had been eating "crap." That's not to say the occasional pasta or potato binge is going to hurt much. But when you have a compelling reason to go low carb, it just makes sense to try to change the way you think about them. Think of them as the enemy. They harm your body because of the diabetes. Think of the low carb alternatives as "medicine." You'd never skip meds that control your diabetes - so don't skip the foods that make the meds work better.

By eating what you know interferes with you plan, you are depriving yourself of good health. That's the deprivation we DON'T want to live with. And - just because someone else chooses to eat something and we don't, it doesn't mean we're depriving ourselves. It's a healthy choice.

Lin
__________________


Life style change started on Jan 13, 2011. I was going to lose 100 pounds by Christmas.
I lost 93 pounds by Oct 1, 2011 and am holding there for now. We'll see what happens.
New goal: To maintain at about 160 Final Goal: To decide if I need to lose more
Just Keep On Keepin' On

Last edited by linJber : 02-02-2012 at 11:14 PM.
linJber is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-02-2012, 11:13 PM   #4
Senior Member
 
Rana's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2010
Posts: 2,137

S/C/G: 200/164/140

Height: 5'5"

Default

I'm in the same boat, but I have PCOS.

I went through a period in time, a couple of years ago where I ranted and cried that it was completely UNFAIR that everyone else could eat whatever the **** they wanted and I was stuck with this stupid insulin resistance that if I didn't treat, would eventually develop into diabetes and then kill me.

Oh, I could have scream and kicked walls those days. I was acting like a rebellious four year old that had just been told no.

I completely understand.

I don't know how I got through it, except that I had to accept that my body was different from other people's bodies and I just started reading up more on it. I discovered that while my body is more sensitive to the carbs in food, in reality everyone is -- that's why Type 2 diabetes develops in a lot of older adults even if they were fine earlier in their lives and didn't have IR.

I think as you get used to eating low carb, you'll find the cravings are less and less. You get stronger and you feel better and it reinforces your decision to be healthy and manage your blood sugar better.
__________________
Rana is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 08:02 AM   #5
Just Yr Everyday Chick
 
JayEll's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2004
Location: Florida
Posts: 10,083

S/C/G: Lost 50 lbs, regained some

Height: 5'3"

Default

Lessons you could take away from this:

Always have at least a loose plan of go-to foods. Carry a list with you if you have to! There you were, hungry and walking the aisles. This is a tough place to be in. You were looking for "something you wanted to eat"--and so you kept going up and down those aisles looking wistfully at foods... Wow! That's my idea of miserable! Instead, you could have stopped at the deli meats and produce and gotten some satisfying foods.

Don't compare to others or dwell on your "sad situation." This is a great way to talk yourself into eating things you shouldn't. As the previous poster said, it's not fair! But that's not the point.

Avoid all-or-nothing thinking. Is the pasta all you had for dinner? Pasta was originally a side dish to a meal, like potatoes--it wasn't the main course. So you could have gotten something like chicken or deli roast beef, a bag of salad, and had a small side of pasta, like 1/2 cup cooked.

Guilt is a pure waste of time. Move on and do better.

Jay
__________________
"My religion is kindness." --His Holiness the Dalai Lama

JayEll is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 08:17 AM   #6
PCOS & Tuesday Weigher
 
knoxie's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: TN/England
Posts: 139

S/C/G: 280/274/147 ish

Height: 5ft4

Default

I have PCOS and am on a moderate carb plan but I was never really much of a carboholic so I don't struggle with that. However I do have foods that I do struggle with - I think most of us do! As much as it's a lifestyle change, you like what foods you like and sometimes it is incredibly tough. I slip up here and there even with the best laid plans because sometimes I just want what I want. It's an on and off thing, I can go for days being fine and then suddenly *boom*.

Aside from planning better and persevering (we all find it tough at some point) don't beat yourself up by any means. Treat it like what it was - a temporary slip. Maybe you have more temporary slips than you'd like right now but that should change with time. Viewing the 'lifestyle change' as all or nothing can break resolve so easily. We're human and sometimes we slip up.
__________________

Back in the game and in it to win it!
Lowest: 229
knoxie is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 09:54 AM   #7
Senior Member
 
Sunshine73's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Illinois
Posts: 639

S/C/G: 327/*ticker*/150

Height: 5'3"

Default

How long have you been on this way of eating? I ask because I had several similar experiences when I was in the first several months of doing low carb. I remember crying (literally CRYING) in the grocery store because everything I wanted was too high in carbs and nothing that was "on plan" was in the slightest bit appealing.

The good news is that nearly a year into this journey and that doesn't happen anymore. Not to say I don't occasionally get a craving or want something not on plan but it's generally more of just a passing thought and not something that is overwhelming.
__________________
Mini Short Term Goal

Long Term Goal
Sunshine73 is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 11:17 AM   #8
Senior Member
 
Munchy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 2,692

S/C/G: 133.4/131.6/115

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by JayEll View Post
Lessons you could take away from this
I AGREE with all of JayEll's lessons. I think the best thing is to plan ahead, because being hungry in a store (or anywhere else) with no plan is difficult. If you don't want to cook in a particular day, make sure you have backup easy meals at home that you like.

Off the top of my head for easy meals, I'm thinking soup, quesadillas (I use the Trader Joe's low carb), stir fry, turkey/Canadian/center cut bacon and eggs, and things you can make ahead and freeze like stew, chili, and meatballs. Use things for your convenience if you need like frozen vegetables, rotisserie chicken, low sodium deli meats. I have been known to order Chinese takeout (the steamed menu) and toss the rice if I'm that unmotivated to cook. I've ordered salads at fast food restaurants without meat - high sodium - when I've been on a road trip.

I was recently on vacation and I swear I was hungry all the time. The area wasn't really a health-conscious place, and almost every menu was filled with fried everything and not many veggie rich choices (unlike the area where I live). I finally went to a grocery store, picked up some ingredients, and cooked for the people I was visiting. We saved money, the food was healthy, and I'm now getting emails asking for my recipes.

It can be difficult when you have specific dietary needs that everyone else doesn't have. When you have to be conscious of what you eat, it can feel unfair to see other people eat the same foods that you know would be hard on your body. Just remember, you are doing this for your health, and if you focus on what you CAN have and not what you CAN'T have, it can put you in a much more positive place.
Munchy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 11:40 AM   #9
Senior Member
 
JoJoP's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 186

S/C/G: 150/136/120

Height: 5'5"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by JayEll View Post
Lessons you could take away from this:

Always have at least a loose plan of go-to foods. Carry a list with you if you have to! There you were, hungry and walking the aisles. This is a tough place to be in. You were looking for "something you wanted to eat"--and so you kept going up and down those aisles looking wistfully at foods... Wow! That's my idea of miserable! Instead, you could have stopped at the deli meats and produce and gotten some satisfying foods.
Excellent advice! I find that a list of things I can always (or almost always) eat without worry keeps me on track
JoJoP is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 12:11 PM   #10
one choice at a time
 
carter's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2009
Posts: 1,294

S/C/G: 275/155/???

Height: 5'5"

Default

In hindsight, something that has been absolutely key to my weight-loss process has been learning how to fill my environment with delicious, flavorful foods that fit my plan.

I love eating - I love it, it's my favorite recreational activity. That's how I got fat! And so in order to lose weight in a sustainable way, I needed to mold my habits so that I could continue to take pleasure in eating.

It's true that there are some delicious foods that are no longer a part of my eating, or are only a part of my eating in a very limited, occasional way. But there is also a vast array of delicious food that I can and do eat. Believe me, I look forward to EVERY meal. Spicy, flavorful, tangy, zesty, fresh meats, fish, legumes, beans, and vegetables fill my diet. Yogurt, fruit. A little bit of cheese, some eggs - all seasoned and bursting with flavor. There is very little that I eat that could not be a part of your low-carb plan, and everything that I eat is flavorful and yummy. If it's possible, I am even more excited about food now than I was when I was eating mindlessly and gaining weight!

So as Jay-Ell says, stop focusing on what you can't have and start thinking about new foods, new approaches to food, that are delicious and exciting. I can help. Lots of people here can help. We can tell you all about how we cook and the foods we enjoy. These things are available to you too, you just have to stop feeling sorry for yourself and reach for them!

Finally, please remove the language of "deprivation" from your weight-loss vocabulary. If you are wandering around a grocery store which is filled to bursting with flavorful vegetables, colorful fruits, fresh meats, and hearty lentils and beans, along with zesty herbs and spices to season them with, you are not deprived. Lacking access to those things - that is true deprivation.
__________________
High weight: 275 (August 2009) *** Low weight: 155 (October 2012)
Today, working off a partial regain. Current weight: 179.
Goals:
* Make the best choice I can make, with every choice.
* Remember that the temptation in front of me is not the last of its kind that I will ever see; say "I'll pass today."
* Say "no!" to my whiny inner five-year-old.

Last edited by carter : 02-03-2012 at 12:12 PM.
carter is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 12:46 PM   #11
Senior Member
 
SouthLake's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2007
Location: Bay Area, CA
Posts: 497

S/C/G: 239/200/130-140

Height: 5'8.5"

Default

My body LOVES carbs. As in, it wants to hold on to them forever and ever because it loves them soooo much. I also don't feel very good when I eat them, and so I've cut most of them out from my normal WOE. For the most part, I follow the Southbeach diet and it works well for me as long as I stick to it. I have tantrums now and then and throw myself into piles of french fries, pastries, and noodles, but that's becoming less and less often.

One of the biggest reasons I've done well is that I've learned to love food. If you haven't already, check out the recipes on Kalyn's Kitchen. I have been terrifically inspired by what she shares, and have found dozens of healthy carb, no sugar recipes that have proved to be very popular.

I also know my limits. When I get lazy and don't want to cook, or absolutely have to eat dinner out, I've learned where I can find something on plan that I'm going to love. For a quick dinner, I love chicken sausages and a bag of some sort of frozen flavored vegetables. I also go for frozen stirfry or fajita mixes. Eating out for fast restuarants- I LOVE me some Chipotle. I get a burrito bowl with either brown rice or no rice, double beans and it's wonderful. I also will get Panda Express with steamed veggies instead of rice or chow mein, and broccoli beef or green bean chicken. Sometimes I splurge and get cream cheese rangoons too.

I know that my last minute choices aren't always ideal, but I'm working on progress, not perfection. Sometimes, I just feel the need to feel like I'm cheating, and so I choose something small, rather than something large to indulge my rebel side

As a side note- I HATE ww pasta. I'm really learning to like brown rice pasta though, it isn't as gritty and tough.
__________________

Fighting back from the regain

Strong is the new skinny.
SouthLake is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 12:52 PM   #12
Senior Member
 
JoJoP's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Posts: 186

S/C/G: 150/136/120

Height: 5'5"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by SouthLake View Post
One of the biggest reasons I've done well is that I've learned to love food.
THIS. SO much!

Learning to love the foods you *can* eat is the key to being able to stick to a diet long term, imo. You CAN be a foodie and stick to a diet!
JoJoP is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 03:56 PM   #13
Senior Member
 
Munchy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2008
Posts: 2,692

S/C/G: 133.4/131.6/115

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by JoJoP View Post
THIS. SO much!

Learning to love the foods you *can* eat is the key to being able to stick to a diet long term, imo. You CAN be a foodie and stick to a diet!
Absolutely! Your food should and CAN taste good, no matter what your food plan is.
Munchy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 06:11 PM   #14
Senior Member
 
Nadya's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2012
Location: New York
Posts: 420

S/C/G: 181/139/120

Height: 5'3.5"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by JoJoP View Post
THIS. SO much!

Learning to love the foods you *can* eat is the key to being able to stick to a diet long term, imo. You CAN be a foodie and stick to a diet!
Agreed. If you don't force a change, healthy food is never going to taste right. I used to find water bland but now it's almost all I drink. Soda, which used to be a staple, is kinda gross to me now. It's simply a matter of liking what you know and very nearly being addicted to it.

I'm trying to work more veggies into my diet. I'm not a fan of some of them...working on green beans... Blech. I'll get it though.
Nadya is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 02-03-2012, 11:30 PM   #15
Senior Member
 
aliasihaya's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Centreville, VA
Posts: 266

S/C/G: 230/see ticker/130

Height: 5'1"

Default

Thanks everyone. I really appreciate the advice.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rana View Post
I'm in the same boat, but I have PCOS.

I went through a period in time, a couple of years ago where I ranted and cried that it was completely UNFAIR that everyone else could eat whatever the **** they wanted and I was stuck with this stupid insulin resistance that if I didn't treat, would eventually develop into diabetes and then kill me.

Oh, I could have scream and kicked walls those days. I was acting like a rebellious four year old that had just been told no.
This is totally how I feel. I'm just bitter and angry at the moment when I walk pass these foods in the store or I see my friends eating them. I'm just feeling deprived. But my nutritionist has been adamant that this is a complete lifestyle change that I have to do for my health. I just haven't been able to accept that yet.

I'm hoping that I'll get to the point where I'd rather have the good foods than the bad. I'm just not there yet and it's frustrating. But it has only been a couple of months. If I can stick with this then hopefully I'll get to that point where I don't think of the word deprivation.
__________________


Sweat Pea from Sucker Punch - "‎Who honors those we love with the very life we live? Who sends monsters to kill us, and at the same time sings that we'll never die? Who teaches us what's real, and how to laugh at lies? Who decides why we live, and what we'll die to defend? Who chains us, and who holds the key to set us free? It's you. You have all the weapons you need. Now fight!"
aliasihaya is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 08:40 AM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2