Hi! I'm new and I decided to join because I can't go on living this way anymore. I have come to a point where I am ashamed of who I am and how much weight I have gained (I gained 60 pounds over a year and a half) and I hate not being able to fit into my clothes.
For a while I weighed 230lbs and was a size 18, and yes I was overweight but I felt comfortable and I wasn't really out of shape. I didn't hate myself back then.
However, once I started going to college I started dating my current boyfriend and things were going great. I lost 30lbs and went down to 200lbs and a size 16 without trying at all, but some days I didn't eat and I wasn't starving myself, I was just extremely busy with college, family, friends, my boyfriend, work, ect. I was so happy and I looked skinny (even though it doesn't seem that skinny).
Then I dropped out of college and I wasn't quite as busy and I gained the weight back over about 6-8 months. I just started eating normal again and it came back.
Now I'm very unhappy because I'm unemployed and searching very hard for work, but I can't get a job. I graduated college and it's been over 2 year since I lost that weight. I now weigh 290lbs and it is a vicious cycle because I think my hormones, mood, and stress effect my weight a lot. I get 30 minutes of exercise AT LEAST 3-4 times a week and I've been really trying a strict diet. I do cheat sometimes but nothing that would make me keep gaining weight! I know in the past I had my thyroid tested and there was nothing wrong with it, so I can only think that now I have an incredibly slow metabolism due to my previous weight loss.
The thing that gets me the most is that when I was losing that weight I ate whatever I wanted! I even ate frosting right out of the can because I used to love sweets! I didn't eat that much but some days I ate a lot of calories and ate other things like kraft mac and cheese and white pasta all the time.
Now I eat tons of vegetables, exercise, drink tons and tons of water, and REALLY watch my calories. I just don't why I'm not losing weight, I'm not eating more than 1500 calories a day. If anything I still seem to be gaining weight!
This is just making me so depressed and I could really use support. I'm too ashamed to reach out to my friends and family and I hate going out anymore because I feel so badly about myself.