Good idea to talk to the dietitian where you work. That would be a good step to take.
I don't believe the 50 pound sacks of potatoes description. If you believe it, then you need to take a better look. Maybe you were just using ugly words because you feel ugly--but you need to stop doing that. It won't help you to see yourself that way.
You need to eat a good amount of nourishing food and stop punishing yourself.
I believe that you know theres something wrong with your thinking and you actions, thats why you are trying to find someone to talk to. Point blank you really need the help of a professional and I pray you take heed to the advice you were given. Again, good luck.
Look, I know you want this weight off NOW NOW NOW but you did not put this weight on in a week or two weeks or a month. You absolutely cannot expect it to come off in a week or two weeks or a month. You aren't grasping the concept that your current diet is HURTING your weight loss. It's hurting the healing process for your injuries. It's hurting your body.
You sound like you hate yourself. Treating your body like trash isn't going to help. You say "Oh, I'll eat 900 calories after I lose 20lbs first because I can't exercise" you can lose weight without exercising but you know what, you have to eat the right amount of the right foods.
I think you are playing dumb about the harm you're doing to yourself. I think you're making excuses for not getting help. Talking to a dietician helps but you need to address your mental health. The dietician will show you how to eat but you're always going to take it overboard if you don't address your eating disorder. You're obsessive about your calories. You're obsessive about your need for exercise. I think you need to recognize that you're sick. Healthy people do not think 300 calories A DAY is a good idea.
The reason you keep gaining weight is because of diets like this. They are not sustainable. You can't keep doing them forever because they are not healthy.
Please, look into programs your area has to offer for mental health. There are hotlines you can call. There are people whose job it is to help you find someone to talk to that you can afford. You do have options, you just have to do some research to find out what they are.
Slow and steady does win the race. You cannot expect 20lbs to come off in an instant, it doesn't work that way. Two months ago none of my clothes fit and neither did my bras. Today I'm wearing a pair of jeans that I couldn't get to zipper two months ago. I'm wearing a bra that fits because I had to buy one. I'm wearing a shirt that's too big for me. It didn't happen in a week. If you're really that uncomfortable in your clothes, GO BUY MORE! I know that feels like giving in but you can't be this impatient about it. Go to a thrift store, find a few things and wear those. Don't destroy your body because of clothes that don't fit.
OK I am still not brave enough to step on the scale. I did muster the courage to take my measurements. Wow that was devastating for me. I am huge just like I feared
Bust 42
Waist 34
Hips 44
I was
Bust 36
Waist 25
Hips 38
I always had wide hips even when I was thin I have to be clothes that are loose on my waist to bit my hips. I went from a size 4 to a size 16 it is ten pounds per pants size I went up six sizes I gained 60 pounds, I was 111 so I must be at least 170 LBS I can not bear to see that just yet. You are all right there has to be something wrong with me to get this big. The thing that is so depressing is it is going to take so long to take this weight off. Probably a year at the least. How was it for you ? Was I hard to be patient enough . The first couple of weeks is the hardest I guess that is the starting point. Thank you all for listening to me and your support I will look into getting help. Right now I can not drive the doctor said not to because o my ankle by I will try to find someone to talk to
Last edited by Enriquesgirl2; 01-13-2012 at 02:24 PM.
I agree with everyone's advice but want to add if you cannot drive and you for some reason need help every state has crisis centers. Google online for your state's Emergency crisis centers, most hospitals have them and they offer help if in need of immediate help. You may also call 911. Please take care of yourself!!
300 calories ! Stop it right now ! You are starving yourself. .
^^^ This. You need to redefine your relationship to food and start eating healthy food in healthy portions every day, not starve yourself until you reach a goal weight and then return to the unhealthy habits that made you gain weight. This has to be a forever lifestyle change that is sustainable. That should be how you decide if a "diet" will work for you- could you do it for the rest of your life? Obviously not, with a 300 Calorie diet. Dump it, and start eating real food in real portions but reasonable portions and get a reasonable amount of exercise every day. You'll be healthier for it.
You are all right there has to be something wrong with me to get this big.
You are the only one who has said this.. No one is condemning you for putting on weight (we're all here for the same reason), we are saying that, because of the way you are abusing yourself, you need to seek help. We are not judging you for your weight, we're trying to get you to see that your relationship with food and your skewed view of dieting are doing substantially more harm to you than you seem to be willing to acknowledge. So, please stop trying to convince yourself that we think you need help because you gained weight (because that is totally wrong), and try to, instead, realize that we're all concerned for your well-being both mentally and physically.
That is why I came here for support from others who may have gone though what I have. Worked hard to lose the weight only to gain more back then they lost. It is such a horrible feeling. I do hate myself for doing gaining the weight back. While I was suffering the pain of extreme exercising when I went to bed hungry night after night I said to myself this is what you get for getting so fat and vowed that I would never do it again but I did. I feel like a failure. I should never have gotten into my history. I can't beleive I opened up like that. I am embarssed now people think I am mentally ill. Maybe I am. But I have to be careful about who I talk to I am a teacher. Thank you all for your concern and advice . I found a online support group that has I am going to look into to start.
Last edited by Enriquesgirl2; 01-14-2012 at 09:58 AM.
I lost 90 pounds and did not go to bed hungry, Not once. Going hungry is not necessary to lose weight. I don't see anywhere where someone has said there is something wrong with you for getting to this weight. These are your words, not ours. there is something wrong with the way you think about it, though.
Please get weighed, you don't even have an idea of what you weigh. If you are 170 as you think, I am here to tell you 170 is not a weight that would cause people to recoil from you in horror. Many would be delighted to weigh 170 and in fact some would pick that as their goal.
Your conceptions are totally skewed. Professional help would be desirable in your case and I urge you to get professional help as soon as you can.
That is why I came here for support from others who may have gone though what I have. Worked hard to lose the weight only to gain more back then they lost. It is such a horrible feeling. I do hate myself for doing gaining the weight back. While I was suffering the pain of extreme exercising when I went to bed hungry night after night I said to myself this is what you get for getting so fat and vowed that I would never do it again but I did. I feel like a failure. I should never have gotten into my history. I can't beleive I opened up like that. I am embarssed now people think I am mentally ill. Maybe I am. But I have to be careful about who I talk to I am a teacher. Thank you all for your concern and advice . I found a online support group that has I am going to look into to start.
Please stop punishing your body and mind for regaining. You deserve so much more. I know it's hard to learn to silence the harsh words in your head. But you are so worth it! Do you have family or friends close to you? I'm sure that they care deeply for you. Would you ever say the sorts of things to someone that you care about that you are telling yourself? Would they say such hurtful things to you? Please treat yourself with the same tenderness that you treat your students.
With encouragement from a friend. I literally dusted off the scale which I have not been on in over three years only to find the battery was dead. it is a digital I swear this not an exucse. I will have to wait until tomarrow on the scale in the nurses office at work as long as nobody is around. My pants are looser but still tight when I sit down.. My underbelly as I cal lit is so fat. I know it has only been a couple of week my I am getting discouraged
Last edited by Enriquesgirl2; 01-16-2012 at 10:18 AM.
With encouragement from a friend. I literally dusted off the scale which I have not been on in over three years only to find the battery was dead. it is a digital I swear this not an exucse. I will have to wait until tomarrow on the scale in the nurses office at work as long as nobody is around. My pants are looser but still tight when I sit down.. My underbelly as I cal lit is so fat. I know it has only been a couple of week my I am getting discouraged
Good for you for taking that step. And look- regardless of what the scale says, try to stop with all the negative self-talk. It's hard to change for the positive if your general attitude is negative. It can take a while, but try to change any negative talk into positive. If you start by saying, "I can't believe I let this happen. Look at me!" change it to, "Yes. Look at me. I've made a decision to start eating healthier and exercising. I've decided to stop allowing my short term desires to overcome my long term health goals. This is a good thing!" Pep talks, girl! Use them.
Looking at your measurements you're pretty much 100% average for an American woman.
The average measurements are listed as:
* White: 41-34-43
* Black: 43-37-46
* Hispanic: 42.5-36-44
* Asian: 41-35-43
So NO you are not some huge sack of 50lbs potatoes, i don't believe that for one second!!!! Also, the thing about your bra? You have to be wearing the wrong size, which is going to cause an extreme amount of pain if you're trying to wear a 40DDD. If your waist is 34 then your underbust can't be 40"!!! That's insane. Measure your underbust tightly and I'm guessing it's going to be around 34" also. If that's the case start trying bras in the 34FF(try also 34G"s and 34F's too). I know some may think I'm crazy for pointing this out when there are much bigger issues here BUT I've had some major body image issues due to my bust size AND back/arm pain (look here for more fitting help). Getting into a correctly fitting bra can do wonders. It'll also help you to be able to do upper body exercises.
Point is. All this self-hate that is coming from you is NOT true. NOT TRUE. Say that to yourself, realize it. You can change. If those are your measurements I was MUCH bigger than you when I started losing (just seem my ticker!) and I lose eating more like 1800-2000 calories a day. 300 is too low. 900 is too low. Eat at least 1200, even if your sedentary. Get a bra that fits and then start doing upper body workouts. You know what? I can't do anything because of a crappy knee. I can't run or bike. But I lift weights, I swim. I do a lot with my upper body. You figure something out and do it.
Start small but start moving. Even if you're just doing punches while watching TV. but make sure you're fueling your body in the process.
Last edited by runningfromfat; 01-16-2012 at 01:54 PM.
