3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support Give and get support here!

Terrified

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 11-24-2011, 09:56 PM   #1
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: NH
Posts: 29

S/C/G: 203/142/111

Height: 5'0

Default Terrified

I am very scared. Losing weight (and maintaining) is going to be a life long battle but I feel like I'm losing my will to do this.

Earlier in the year I was at a very solid 130 but I've had a very difficult past couple of months. Due to personal issues I started eating a lot more than I normally would. I wasn't even hungry. I was just eating because I was sad. As a result I've put on 12lbs. I always hear about how obese people lose weight and then gain it all back (plus more!). I'm really scared that this is the road I'm headed down.

Although I'm not back at 200+, I find that I really dislike being back in the 140s. It's terribly uncomfortable now that I know what the 130s feel like. The thought of potentially gaining even more weight back is completely mortifying. And yet it's like I've lost control. I know what I need to do in order to lose weight but I've lost the will to fight this fight because I'm so profoundly sad right now.
coastalvagrant is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-24-2011, 10:14 PM   #2
Knocking down walls.
 
theox's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Southwestern US
Posts: 1,509

S/C/G: 278/ticker/125

Height: 5'4"

Default



I'm sorry things are so rough for you right now. Have you been able to find anything that helps you deal with your sadness, like books on grief or counseling? Are there any easy choices/baby steps that you could make to restart your healthy eating habits? Maybe not even things that will help you lose weight, but that will at least help you stay where you are or slow your rate of regain until you can deal with things better? Are you exercising? It's not a panacea, of course, but it seems to help a lot of people deal with "negative" emotions.

Hang in there.
__________________

Back to Old Ticker Weight/Valentine's Day Challenge:

Upcoming events:
Halloween
Thanksgiving
Christmas
Spring Conference
theox is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2011, 07:52 AM   #3
Senior Member
 
seagirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2009
Location: East Coast US
Posts: 2,439

S/C/G: 195/180.2/165

Height: 5'9"

Default

You are not "obese people" you are you. You get to choose your actions and what your hands and feet do and what you put in your mouth. Just because other people do something doesn't mean you are destined to do that do.

Get back on track today. Stop and breathe. Make a plan. Set a goal and work that plan one day at a time to get to your goal.
__________________
.
It's about commitment, not motivation.
seagirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2011, 08:35 AM   #4
Senior Member
 
bargoo's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Davis, Ca
Posts: 23,149

S/C/G: 204/114/120

Height: 5'

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by seagirl View Post
You are not "obese people" you are you. You get to choose your actions and what your hands and feet do and what you put in your mouth. Just because other people do something doesn't mean you are destined to do that do.

Get back on track today. Stop and breathe. Make a plan. Set a goal and work that plan one day at a time to get to your goal.
Agree .
__________________
Goal 12/21/2007
bargoo is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2011, 08:49 AM   #5
I choose me...
 
InsideMe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: Toronto Canada
Posts: 882

S/C/G: HW 265/SW 240/CW ticker/GW 150

Height: 5 Ft 3

Default

Be kind to you, yes you gained some back but you have a choice NOW on what you want to do. It's not destined that your going to get back up to 200, it's your choice on what you want to do right now!

Look how amazing you have done. You have the strength INSIDE of you cause you've done it before. Find new ways to cope with your sadness, google it, research it, go to the library read up on it, go for a run, make a choice now to handle it differently than you have in the past. Cause you KNOW which road will lead you to your goal and which road will lead you back to the 200's. You can do this, YOU HAVE BEEN DOING THIS. So pat yourself on the back for recognizing NOW what you are doing. You are noticing how you cope with sadness. THIS IS GREAT! Now that you are aware that you are eating cause you are sad, you can now CHANGE that and never have to look back. Be thankful that you are aware of it now You are doing awesome, don't let a little set back turn into a bigger setback, make the choice now and change it, you have it in you or you would have never hit the 130's before, you can do it again! This time with more awareness!
__________________


every 5lbs lost




Half-Way Progress Pics
InsideMe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2011, 09:49 PM   #6
Overweight again...dang
 
twinieten's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2011
Location: Arizona
Posts: 871

S/C/G: 213/160.3/135

Height: 5'5"

Default

If you're feeling so profoundly sad, maybe it's time for you to consider a little bit of help, like an antidepressant.

I don't want to undermine your pain. The best way to handle sadness and pain are just to get through it. I've been there. Sometimes though, there's nothing wrong with a little bit of help through chemistry.

I was having a really hard time where I just felt like I couldn't control the sadness. It went on for awhile, and I didn't want to be reduced to a puddle of tears at random times for random reasons, especially at work. I started taking a supplement called 5HTP, which is the precursor for serotonin, the feel good neurotransmitter. It really worked well for me! Later I learned that it can help in weight loss. I can see why. Part of why some people are fat is the good feeling we get from food. If we have nice levels of serotonin, it could help with the food issues.

Well, that's just an idea. I'm thinking about the 140s and how I wish I was there! 140s is awesome! But hey, I get it. You're ideal weight is in the teens, so that's a pretty big gain for you....

It is a life long battle and the idea of fighting this battle for a lifetime is daunting. I know, I've been there done that, and I think many of us have. We lose, we gain, and we lose again. The key is doing what you're doing right now, and that's recognizing what's going on and getting back to it, before you get all the way back to where you were, and then some! You've come so far! You can do it! You can learn from this and keep it off. It will be a lifelong commitment, but I've heard it said that it gets easier over time.
__________________
"Nothing tastes as good as thin feels!"

"Losing weight is hard. Being fat is hard. Pick your hard."

Total Goal Weight:



I weigh myself every day. It keeps me accountable.
twinieten is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2011, 10:10 PM   #7
Run, run, run!
 
PrairieGirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2011
Location: SK, Canada
Posts: 182

S/C/G: 204/160/???

Height: 5'4"

Default

I just posted something very similar.

I'm struggling to maintain the healthy changes I've made and reverting to old behaviours. It is going to be a lifelong battle for me as a food addict to fight this. I have to do it, but maybe we both need some help?
__________________
Goals:
1. Achieve healthy BMI
2. Complete first triathlon
3. Run the QCM Marathon
4. Wear a bikini with confidence
5. Eliminate binge eating

[/url]
PrairieGirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-25-2011, 10:25 PM   #8
Rosebud
 
Justwant2Bhealthy's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 6,945

S/C/G: 30/Goal Met:L-XL/relosing some

Default

TO YOU, DEAR ~ I don't know the cause of your sadness, but if it is a kind of grief, or depression (which is prolonged sadness), and has been going on for more than 3 months, you should seek some help: by the way of counselling and/ see your doctor too.

You can try some distraction techniques to see if they help a bit -- I like to read, do puzzles, sing, play the piano, games, talk, journal, and write, etc. How can you bring some more joy into your life? Get out and spend time with family & friends; doing fun things together; maybe watch some funny movies, etc.

You have done very well up until now; so you know how to eat healthy. Getting back on track is a process of steps; one-at-a-time. Take the first one now: which is decision; then committment; then action ... plus keep coming back here for support ...


EDIT TO ADD: just start with one snack, or one meal, or one day at-a-time: mini-goals (thanks CHLOE); even if you make a mistake, just keep on going ... and get the junk out of your house!
__________________
ONE-STEP-AT-A-TIME PHIL 4:13 " I CAN "
YA GOTTA HAVE FAITH KEEP ON, KEEPIN' ON
= 10 lbs ...
115 lbs + 16 Single Sizes Gone Forever! -- 100 lb tumor = ONEDERLAND!
Progress Pics: http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/look...ml#post4361876

Last edited by Justwant2Bhealthy : 11-25-2011 at 10:59 PM.
Justwant2Bhealthy is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-26-2011, 01:51 PM   #9
Senior Member
 
rubidoux's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2011
Location: San Diego
Posts: 482

S/C/G: 214/ticker/130

Height: 5'1.5"

Default

I'm sorry you're feeling sad. I agree with previous poster that at some point you might want to think about taking something. I think a couple of months is a pretty long time to feel consistently down.

I've been having the same sorts of feelings/fears about my weight, though I am in a whole 'nother weight range. When I got down to 173, I felt so thin most of the time (and then sometimes I would realize that 173 is actually pretty darned fat if you're 5'0"). But now I've gained back 15 pounds and I am feeling SO FAT. Like, I feel that really cruddy feeling where every time I move I feel how fat I am. I have been been heavier than this without feeling so yucky about it, but now that I have tasted what it's like to be lower... well, I don't like being this heavy!

Anyhow, last week I was freaking out because I had my b'day (monday) and thanksgiving looming ahead of me. I was planning on making a great t'giving dinner for hubby and kids and really looking forward to it. I promised myself that I would get back on a good eating jag as soon as t'giving was over, but as you can imagine I have made those promises before. I have to say though, that that fear is pretty motivating to me (at least sometimes), and getting back on a good eating plan is such a relief when you've been feeling fat and scared about it. I did start right back in yesterday and I feel so much better emotionally and physically. Instead of having this big hard thing looming ahead of me, I'm in it and it's not really that bad. I would love to eat something yummy, but I'm already enjoying the benefits of sticking to my plan. I'm .8 pounds lighter but I feel a huge weight lifted, iykwim.

I wonder if your mood would improve if you got back on your plan. Mine always does, but that may be because I do a ketogenic diet. I'm not sure if other plans have this same effect or not...

Btw, it's not everyday I see someone who was in the same height/weight range as me. I'm curious about how you felt at 130 and whether after getting there you felt like 111 was still sensible. I set 114 as my goal, so pretty close, but when I was younger I felt pretty good at 135 and great at 130. I was always softish, but I had a nice shape and wore it well. I felt attractive and energetic and comfortable with my body at 130. Otoh, if I was into women, they would not be stick thin. lol I'm so curious to see how I feel at 130 and 114. I hope I make it there!
__________________




type I diabetic and mama to ds1 (9/14/03) and ds2 (2/11/09)
sometimes vlc, sometimes pure carnivore, always once-a-day feeding
rubidoux is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-26-2011, 02:02 PM   #10
Senior Member
 
ptod's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: CT
Posts: 237

S/C/G: 337/164/160

Height: 5' 6.5" ('cuz the .5 counts!)

Default

You only fail if you quit. It is a choice. Choose to continue to reach out here or professionally for help and support. As an earlier poster noted, you are You, not 'those people". Hugs!
ptod is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 11-26-2011, 04:26 PM   #11
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: NH
Posts: 29

S/C/G: 203/142/111

Height: 5'0

Default

Thanks for the support everyone.

Those of you suggesting I seek help for my sadness are right. I have struggled with trauma and anxiety issues for many years and I was seeing a therapist. I had to stop temporarily because I moved to a different town. I will likely go back in January when I move back to my old town but until then I'm on my own. See what happened is I got a higher paying job that it turns out I absolutely despise. I know I should be thankful that I have a job at all but I left behind my friends and my home for something that I ended up hating. So between my horrible job and my homesickness, it's hard to remember to keep fighting the weight gain.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Justwant2Bhealthy View Post
You can try some distraction techniques to see if they help a bit -- I like to read, do puzzles, sing, play the piano, games, talk, journal, and write, etc. How can you bring some more joy into your life? Get out and spend time with family & friends; doing fun things together; maybe watch some funny movies, etc.
It's been hard to keep distracted. I'm so drained and miserable from work that when I get home all I want to do is lie down under the covers and cry. There's a special little draft horse filly on the farm I live at who is helping me a lot though. Being able to take care of her has been the one bright spot of these past couple of months.

Quote:
Originally Posted by rubidoux View Post
Btw, it's not everyday I see someone who was in the same height/weight range as me. I'm curious about how you felt at 130 and whether after getting there you felt like 111 was still sensible. I set 114 as my goal, so pretty close, but when I was younger I felt pretty good at 135 and great at 130. I was always softish, but I had a nice shape and wore it well. I felt attractive and energetic and comfortable with my body at 130. Otoh, if I was into women, they would not be stick thin. lol I'm so curious to see how I feel at 130 and 114. I hope I make it there!
Having a weight problem is difficult for anyone but I think there are some unique factors involved in being overweight at our height. Personally I loved being at 130. I felt so bony (compared to at 200 anyway). It was wonderful. I've been overweight/obese my whole life so I hadn't been at the 130s since I was probably 10 or 11. Even though I still looked pretty obviously overweight I was thinking that if I were to never lose another pound that I'd still feel okay at 130. I think I will look a lot better at 111 though. I wish you the best of luck. Even getting down to the 150s/140s will be so worth it.
coastalvagrant is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off

Similar Threads
Thread Thread Starter Forum Replies Last Post
I want to go off pill. But I'm terrified helwa588 PCOS/Insulin Resistance Support 11 03-08-2011 01:46 PM
Anyone else terrified of this?? Jess8 300+ Club 17 07-24-2008 12:51 AM


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 11:38 AM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2