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-   -   Lost the weight, now I'm losing my mind..(rant) (https://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/weight-loss-support/247044-lost-weight-now-im-losing-my-mind-rant.html)

melodymist 11-14-2011 08:32 AM

Lost the weight, now I'm losing my mind..(rant)
 
RANDOM THOUGHTS:
  • Don't lose anymore weight.
  • You look like a skeleton (yeah right!)
  • You're full of bulls*** because you don't eat this or that..
  • You're obsessed.
  • A chocolate won't kill you. (Yes I know, but if I eat a chocolate everytime that I visit you, it will.)
  • My best friend is drifting away from me and her confidence is in a dip because of my weight loss.
  • You say you want to lose weight, and yet when I help you and give advice, you throw it all back in my face. You said you wanted help. This isn't easy.
  • Because, eventhough I lost all this weight, you STILL don't like me.
  • I hate that everyone thinks I'm competition now.
  • I don't like the fact that everywhere I go people go bonkers over my weightloss and my weight is "open for discussion".
  • Don't try to stuff me with unhealthy food. I'm not pushing a rice cake down your mouth.
  • 'When are you getting of this diet?" - It's not a diet, it's my way of life and if I get "off" all the weight will come back.
  • Stop crying over how fat you are just to order take aways, with drinks and dessert and ice cream.

But what I hate most is..people not granting me any happiness and joy, over my new healthy self.

sontaikle 11-14-2011 08:56 AM

So much of what you wrote happens to me too. Quite frankly it's getting annoying at this point and I think one day I'm just going to lash out!

It's one of the reasons I never told anyone about my weight loss at my job that I started back in September. I've lost 17 pounds since then, but either nobody noticed or they're just not saying anything. Then again, 17 pounds is a lot less dramatic than 60...

It's refreshing to go to work and NOT hear about my weight loss or the comments/criticisms that seem to follow me wherever I go.

bargoo 11-14-2011 09:07 AM

I don't discuss it either, if someone brings it up I change the subject and move on. As hard as it is , we have to learn to ignore these comments.

Unna 11-14-2011 09:16 AM

What does your weight loss have to do with your best friend's confidence? just curious....

angeeskye 11-14-2011 09:18 AM

you have done amazing and jealously is an ugly thing! Alot of people cant handle the success of others and try to bring them down. But you did this for you and anyone that truly wants your help will be accepting to it. just keep doing you! I think your amazing!

dancinginpaint 11-14-2011 09:49 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Unna (Post 4107412)
What does your weight loss have to do with your best friend's confidence? just curious....

Some people simply can't handle it when others they know are improving themselves or making changes. Especially if that person is making changes that they wish the had the determination to do themselves. Sometimes they find it easier to avoid that person than have to deal with such unpleasant and complicated feelings. So it could have everything to do with it. Doesn't make it right or fair, but it happens.

OP I haven't lost the weight that you have so its harder for me to understand but you are doing great. Remember people are people no matter what you do and they will have opinions no matter what, just have to decide whose opinions are even worth pondering.

Way to go! You're doing great!

Jonsgurl0531 11-14-2011 11:00 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by melodymist (Post 4107351)
RANDOM THOUGHTS:
  • Don't lose anymore weight.
  • You look like a skeleton (yeah right!)
  • You're full of bulls*** because you don't eat this or that..
  • You're obsessed.
  • A chocolate won't kill you. (Yes I know, but if I eat a chocolate everytime that I visit you, it will.)
  • My best friend is drifting away from me and her confidence is in a dip because of my weight loss.
  • You say you want to lose weight, and yet when I help you and give advice, you throw it all back in my face. You said you wanted help. This isn't easy.
  • Because, eventhough I lost all this weight, you STILL don't like me.
  • I hate that everyone thinks I'm competition now.
  • I don't like the fact that everywhere I go people go bonkers over my weightloss and my weight is "open for discussion".
    [*]Don't try to stuff me with unhealthy food. I'm not pushing a rice cake down your mouth.
  • 'When are you getting of this diet?" - It's not a diet, it's my way of life and if I get "off" all the weight will come back.
  • Stop crying over how fat you are just to order take aways, with drinks and dessert and ice cream.

But what I hate most is..people not granting me any happiness and joy, over my new healthy self.


I get those the most. Since I'm visiting home I see alot of people I haven't in awhile... so when I'm with my Mom it goes like this. " Do you see how thin she is! I can't believe it. You know I'm wearing her old jeans... she couldn't fit into these at the beginning of the summer... probably why she lost all the weight." And sooo on. I know she is proud of me but really... I lost weight because I was tired of being tired.. tired of being fat and struggling with my clothes.

I've had people tell me I wouldn't look good at my goal weight and that I should stay at my current weight. I mention that I might lower my goal weight and reactions are pretty crazy.. from "WOW I'll never speak to you again.:nono:" TO "that isnt healthy "etc etc... umm yah it is healthy. The whole reason of losing weight is to BE HEALTHY.. and right now my BMI is still overweight... :rolleyes:

The only person who really has my back is my hubby. He has been so amazing and supportive and just plain PROUD of me.:hug:

princessgina00 11-14-2011 11:52 AM

I don't understand this rant, but it's because I am the very OPPOSITE of the OP's feelings. I hate it when people DON'T notice my weight loss, especially if they haven't seen me in a while. :p I don't care what their comments/opinions are as long as they notice I've lost a lot of weight. I guess some people are more touchy about their weight loss than others. I don't get down when people make derogatory comments about my weight loss (although, to be fair, no one's actually done that to me), but I do become a little bummed when people do not even notice my smaller self.

cherrypie 11-14-2011 12:00 PM

people are going to react the way they react. Just like always. If you maintain long enough it will become old news and they will move on to something else.

runningfromfat 11-14-2011 12:15 PM

OP, hang in there. It's hard, there are just so many insane comments out there about weight. Most of the time I just try and ignore them (and I avoid weight related conversations because of it). It's said because I DO like to talk about weight loss and exercise but sometimes a very harsh comment can really bring you down (even if you know better!).

You're doing amazing and I'm sure you look amazing too!

Quote:

Originally Posted by princessgina00 (Post 4107611)
I don't understand this rant, but it's because I am the very OPPOSITE of the OP's feelings. I hate it when people DON'T notice my weight loss, especially if they haven't seen me in a while. :p I don't care what their comments/opinions are as long as they notice I've lost a lot of weight. I guess some people are more touchy about their weight loss than others. I don't get down when people make derogatory comments about my weight loss (although, to be fair, no one's actually done that to me), but I do become a little bummed when people do not even notice my smaller self.

I go back and forth on this. Sometimes it drives me insane that people don't notice and then other times I'm happy to not have to talk about it. I guess it depends who notices and how they deal with it. ;)

melodymist 11-14-2011 12:42 PM

I get why some of you don't get this post. It's soooo complicated.

Yes at the beginning I also wanted people to notice my weightloss and if they didn't comment on it I would get annoyed.

I REALLY don't mind if you tell me I lost weight, if you haven't seen me in a while, but the people who I constantly see, who ALWAYS comments on it like everyday is getting really annoying. It's like if I have new haircut people will comment on it, now imagine people commenting on it everyday they saw you for the next year.

Someone yesterday said: "You shouldn't weigh in the 130's, it's way too low" - but last week she said she wanted to weigh 120lbs. Yeah :dizzy:

shr1nk1ngme 11-14-2011 12:55 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by melodymist (Post 4107351)
But what I hate most is..people not granting me any happiness and joy, over my new healthy self.

I pray that you will be able to experience happiness, joy, and health as having already been granted to you, regardless of the misguided comments/behaviors of others. Whether they change, or not! -- Because you deserve happiness, joy, and health, regardless.

So sorry you are experiencing the jealousy of friends and people who are trying to force-feed you junk food. Also, some people just don't understand it's a way of life, to them a diet is only temporary, and you may have to reeducate them even though it makes you uncomfortable.

Hugs, ((MelodyMist)) :hug:

hatgirlie 11-14-2011 01:31 PM

Ignore the comments. You're doing great. Keep up the good work!

princessgina00 11-14-2011 01:59 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by melodymist (Post 4107688)
I REALLY don't mind if you tell me I lost weight, if you haven't seen me in a while, but the people who I constantly see, who ALWAYS comments on it like everyday is getting really annoying. It's like if I have new haircut people will comment on it, now imagine people commenting on it everyday they saw you for the next year.

I guess I don't understand your dilemma because I'm pretty curt, so conversations with me tend to last all of two sentences. They usually go something like this: Someone says something to me about something (e.g. weight loss). I say something cordial in return. There is usually like 5 minutes of awkward silence, and then the person either changes the subject or moves on to talk to someone else. :D Only my sister tends to make frequent comments about my weight and its usually something innocuous like, "How much weight have you lost since last time?" I keep it short and sweet, so there is never any room for long soliloquies regarding weight, weight loss, or anything else for that matter. :cool:

carter 11-14-2011 02:07 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by princessgina00 (Post 4107770)
I guess I don't understand your dilemma because I'm pretty curt, so conversations with me tend to last all of two sentences. They usually go something like this: Someone says something to me about something (e.g. weight loss). I say something cordial in return. There is usually like 5 minutes of awkward silence, and then the person either changes the subject or moves on to talk to someone else. :D Only my sister tends to make frequent comments about my weight and its usually something innocuous like, "How much weight have you lost since last time?" I keep it short and sweet, so there is never any room for long soliloquies regarding weight, weight loss, or anything else for that matter. :cool:

Definitely everyone has different experiences.

I sometimes feel very lucky reading the posts here, because I don't have any office busy-bodies or catty cousins or whatever who take it upon themselves to be the food police, to comment on what I am having for lunch, or tell me I've lost enough weight. To read the near daily complaints in this forum, you'd think such people lurk around every corner. And yet, all I get from my coworkers and acquaintances is the occasional sincere compliment on my appearance. People have asked me how I've done it, and said "wow, I'm impressed with your dedication" when I told them I did it the old-fashioned way. But that is it. No one's ever asked me what I weigh, what I used to weigh, how much more I plan to lose. No one tries to "push" food on me, no one gives me a second look when I say "no thank you" to some treat being passed around at a meeting, no one looks over my shoulder and questions what I am eating for lunch. None of my friends is acting weird, or pushing me away, or expressing any kind of jealousy.

Just based on my own experiences, I'd say, what is going on with people who have these complaints? But quite obviously, I am one of the lucky ones - surrounded by largely reasonable people who, on the whole, mind their own business. Many, many people here seem not to be so fortunate.


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