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Missed my first and most important (to me) weight goal.

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Old 07-05-2011, 01:06 PM   #1
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Default Missed my first and most important (to me) weight goal.

I’m disappointed and know where I could have done better. I picked a new goal though and changed my ticker. I had hoped to be 132 by July 4th and when I set that goal it was quite conservative! I beat myself up a little but a dear fellow-ette 3FC poster renewed my motivation yesterday.

A few things have held me back lately. The start of summer BBQ’s, 4th of July, becoming somewhat content at my current weight, etc. The worst one, however, is that I’m embracing the dating scene again after 2 years. I’ve met 4 different guys and between them all have gone out 9 times over the past 2 weeks. Then factor in my girlfriend time. It all surrounds food! My old mindset is creeping back in too where I’d lose a significant amount of weight and start bargaining with myself when it comes to food -- “Oh, this one bad meal won’t hurt”. And honestly, that ONE meal doesn’t hurt. I’ll maintain. But because I don’t see an immediate weight gain on the scale I allow myself more and more bad meals thinking I’ll have the same result of maintaining. Umm, yeah, not so much! And it’s not helping that all the guys I have met (via an online dating site, btw) have all been very complimentary about my bod. I’m still overweight but I got me some decent (but proportionate) curves now!

So it’s time to trim the fat – literally and figuratively!! I am Dear John’ing 2 of the 4 guys, cutting back a little on the girlfriend outings and heading back to the gym more. I am going to start saying no to BBQ’s for a while but instead make “an appearance” once the food festivities have passed. I’m not giving up dating completely though so don’t even go there!
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1/4/15: Restarting my journey exactly 4 years from when I first started in January 2011. Reached my goal weight in 2012 and regained half of it back.

I never should have left 3FC!

Last edited by ShanIAm : 07-05-2011 at 01:43 PM.
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Old 07-05-2011, 01:26 PM   #2
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Good for you for re-committing. It sounds like you know what you need to do.

BUT I hate to see you beat yourself up. You have no reason to be disappointed in yourself. You know you've lost nearly 50 lbs. That's no small accomplishment. What's 3 lbs by a certain date when compared to that?

It's true that life does get in the way of weight loss, it's a fact. But I hope you can find a good balance that allows you to enjoy yourself and your friends but doesn't derail you from getting where you want.
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Old 07-05-2011, 01:40 PM   #3
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zoodoo613 is absolutely right, you've lost 50lbs!! You should be so proud of yourself. You said you know where you could have done better, so implement those changes and you'll have that last 3lbs off in no time. But I think that you shouldn't stress over missing your deadline, as long as the weight comes off and you get to a healthy BMI that's all that matters. We're all rooting for you! Good luck x
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Old 07-05-2011, 08:32 PM   #4
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My old mindset is creeping back in too where Id lose a significant amount of weight and start bargaining with myself when it comes to food -- Oh, this one bad meal wont hurt. And honestly, that ONE meal doesnt hurt. Ill maintain. But because I dont see an immediate weight gain on the scale I allow myself more and more bad meals thinking Ill have the same result of maintaining. Umm, yeah, not so much!

Your loss keeps me inspired, I'm trying to catch up! Although the lbs are so very slow to come off now. Your statement about "one meal" rings so true. i do allow myself special meals out for birthdays etc but so far I have been good about right back on the horse the next day with no harm done. In the past I have been guilty of starting with one hamburger and finding myself 4 months later with a whole bucket of KFC. generally when the KFC comes home I realize it's all gone to ****. There is nothing good about sharing a family meal between two people...

Maybe the next dates should be a walk or bowling or something else fun and not food related! It doesn't have to all be about food does it?

You should give yourself a serious pat on the back for making it this far and go into your closet and put on some of the skinny clothes that you remember wishing you could fit into!
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Old 07-05-2011, 08:49 PM   #5
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShanIAm View Post
A few things have held me back lately. The start of summer BBQs, 4th of July, becoming somewhat content at my current weight, etc.
I totally hear you on becoming content at your current weight. I fell off the weight-loss wagon in a bad way a few months ago when I was about 148. I was so happy with how well I was doing, and I kept getting so many compliments from family and friends that I sort of became complacent. For once in my life I wasn't obese, and it felt good. I got lazy, stopped counting calories and working out, and unfortunately gained about 10 lbs back. I see now that it's okay to be happy with my progress and how my body has changed, and yes, it's even okay to love my body now. BUT! I still want to reach goal. I still want to rock my 128 lb bod with lean muscles and little to no flab. That's what has motivated me to start my weightloss again and keep going.

I'm glad you realized all this BEFORE taking a giant step backwards, as I did. You should be proud of yourself! Congrats on your accomplishments so far, and good luck on the last few lbs sweetie!
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Old 07-06-2011, 06:06 PM   #6
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Thanks for asking, DoingGood!

I'm sticking to my plan. Even cancelled a date I had lined up tonight because it just wasn't worth it. It was going to be at a sports bar which always ='s greasy fried food!

The scale moved this morning from 135 to 134! I am offically at a 50 pound loss and my faith has certainly been restored. Feeling good again!

Thanks for the article recommendation. Going to check it out now!
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1/4/15: Restarting my journey exactly 4 years from when I first started in January 2011. Reached my goal weight in 2012 and regained half of it back.

I never should have left 3FC!
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Old 07-07-2011, 12:36 AM   #7
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hey, it's good you're catching yourself! you may not have met your goal in time, but you were only 2 lbs away. i would count that as a victory that you're still going.
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Old 07-07-2011, 02:04 AM   #8
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When you go out do a more active date.
Play a tennis match, go for a walk, a canoe date, try a climbing course, or ride a bike together.
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Old 07-07-2011, 11:20 AM   #9
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Quote:
Originally Posted by ShanIAm View Post
The scale moved this morning from 135 to 134! I am offically at a 50 pound loss and my faith has certainly been restored. Feeling good again!
Glad you're feeling better, you've quite a lot to be proud of.

Threads like this are the reason I always bore everyone by advocating against calendar-linked weight goals! Very glad to see you both getting right back on the horse plan-wise, and feeling better about your overall accomplishments - rather than focusing on the scale falling on the wrong place on some arbitrary date.
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Today, working off a partial regain. Current weight: 179.
Goals:
* Make the best choice I can make, with every choice.
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* Say "no!" to my whiny inner five-year-old.
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Old 07-07-2011, 11:23 AM   #10
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You should never set a goal to lose a certain number of pounds by a specific date. You see what happens when you don't. That isn't what keeps the weight off in the end. The best goals are the ones that lead you toward a new lifestyle that will lead to healthy weight loss.
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Old 07-07-2011, 11:29 AM   #11
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GIRL! - 50 lbs is SO FREAK'N AWESOME!!! You are totally "in the zone" and we are all so proud for you!!!! You're doing it! FURTHER MORE! - you are DOING IT RIGHT!!!

That said, this is exactly why I don't like to make "lose x lbs by x date" vows. If I don't "make my goal" then I feel disappointment, no matter how much weight I've lost. I do hope to be at my goal weight by xmas time, but I'm not making that a goal date. I just wanna get the weight off, and, THIS TIME, keep it off.

Now, as for all the dating... lawd have mercy!!!
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Old 07-09-2011, 08:38 AM   #12
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You know what? I absolutely agree with the goal weight date trap. It didn't really bother me until recently because I always hit those goals. My professional life consists of living and breathing deadlines. I guess I adopted the same philosphy with my weight loss because, after all, it's a "job" in and of itself! And although I still have a final goal with a date attached, I'm not going to get myself into a tizzy if I don't make it. And likely, I won't -- but that's OK!

Thank you guys. I took everything you all said to heart! I can't put into words just how much your support means to me!

With that said, I did make my 132 goal this morning. I've been waiting for this day for a long, LONG time.
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1/4/15: Restarting my journey exactly 4 years from when I first started in January 2011. Reached my goal weight in 2012 and regained half of it back.

I never should have left 3FC!
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Old 07-09-2011, 08:50 AM   #13
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I'm not even as close to goal as you are, but have a lot of the same feelings. Matter of fact, I am starting to reconsider my goal weight (by a lot) because I am feeling so content with where I am. BUT, and that is a big but, I still have some work to do and I know it deep down. I am missing goals too for the same reasons you are (except dating). I really thought summer would be easy to get through, that I would naturally be more active and not want to eat as much, wrong.
Good for you for getting to that goal and for realizing what you needed to add or cut out of your life to get there. And through reading your struggles, it really helps me to evaluate my progress/plan and make the adjustments I need to!
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Old 07-09-2011, 03:22 PM   #14
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You're example is inspiring me! I had a "treat" out at a Tim Horton's today. I was thinking about taking the rest of the day "off from healthy" but in the end that doesn't get me to my goal. After reading your story here, I'm going to be healthy for the rest of the day. I had my treat, now move on!

With the guys, let them know that you are a healthy person. You don't mind going out, having a good time and enjoying a nice meal. But, explain that you like places with some healthier options. If they really like you, then they'll find places that you'll enjoy more!

I also like the idea of being careful about setting deadlines for weight goals. As you can see in my sig I have a couple of them. LOL. I tend to go quite conservative with them. I only pick to lose a couple pounds. But, if I don't meet them, that's allright. I'll keep going.

Thank you! You're doing awesome! Just keep movin'!
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