How to feel good about yourself with extra weight

[indiblue]

Even though I derive some of my self-esteem and self-worth from work, volunteering, etc, I understand where you're coming from- a part of it does definitely come from the way you physically feel about yourself. For me, this cannot be compensated by something work or relationship related.

Exercise is the tried and true way for me to feel confident, proud, and grateful for my body. When I see what I can do, what I can accomplish physically, I feel empowered and beautiful. Physically feeling good about yourself doesn't necessarily mean you have to be in love with every single physical feature about yourself, but it does mean you are happy with the amazing things your body can do. When I exercise I am reminded how grateful I am I have a body that can run, jump, lift, push, and pull, and that I am so lucky to have my legs, my arms, my heart. All I want to do after I exercise I strengthen my body and love my body, and this is a much better feeling than hating its imperfections!

[astrophe]

There's a quote that goes something like "if you want good self esteem, do esteemable things."

So that's a part of it right there -- what do you do that's esteemable? Sports? Work? Volunteering? Art? Whatever it is your interests are at... are you learning/doing them?

How about in your relationships? Are you relating to people in an esteemable way? (ex: not letting yourself be a doormat, sticking up for the little guy, telling the truth even when hard, etc.)

How about in your self care? Do you take in exercise, eat healthy, take meds on time (if you need any), talk to yourself nicely (vs beating yourself up), manage stress, practice good hygiene, are neat and clean about your person, etc?

Working on all these area can help strengthen your self esteem.

A.

[theox]

Remind yourself of all the things about yourself that you like, that you consider yourself good at, or that you've accomplished (whether it's winning a Nobel prize or brushing your hair this morning). You're more than just a number on a scale.

[Heleninedinburgh]

Thankyou Krampus, you're right, it is a beautiful beautiful city and I am lucky to be here, plus it is actually designed so you can walk from one place to another fairly easily without going through loads of traffic, there's los of cycle tracks and things, so I'm trying to take advantage of that (although it's pouring down today!)

I think you're right about non weight goals too, I'm into writing, directing etcetera, and people have told me that I'm good, but I'm ashamed to say that my weight has put me off applying for arts/theatre/media jobs....so I might go for that...

Originally Posted by krampus

Helen, Edinburgh is the first foreign city I ever visited. It's a beautiful city and you're lucky to be there!

It is really easy to get sucked into the "when I lose weight I'll do X or feel X" mind trap, but time is ticking and life is too short and precious to put off until you reach some number pulled out of a hat.

I think it's important to have non-weight/appearance related goals to work toward. What are some things you've always wanted to learn how to do? Did you play an instrument or do a hobby when you were younger that you miss doing? Is there somewhere you'd like to travel to? Working on these sorts of goals is a way to make you feel like you are doing something productive, and since the focus is not on looks you will hopefully not be thinking about weight all the time.