05-12-2011, 05:52 PM
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#32
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Senior Member
Join Date: Aug 2008
Location: East Coast
Posts: 672
S/C/G: 220/150.4/130
Height: 5' 6" on a good day
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Quote:
Originally Posted by saef
The thing about street harassment of any kind is that it's all about the guy asserting his dominance over a random female by bullying her.
Yeah, it's about power. He felt that in the transaction, you had more power than he did. He wanted to take away some of your power.
What's the easiest thing to go after, regarding a woman's power? Yep, it's her physical appearance.
These street guys say things to women they have no hope of meeting, impressing, being treated as equals by, or obtaining things from. In your case, it was money. In other instances, it's sexual attention.
It's a case of them trying to rectify a perceived imbalance of power. They're men, but the woman is out of their league -- because of her looks, her social status, a certain confidence in her walk, her having money when thy don't -- and she is more powerful than they are. This is an intolerable situation for them; they just can't deal with that psychologically.
Take his nasty epithet as a backhanded tribute. At that moment, you were very powerful. You had the power to deny him something, which you did. You had the power to keep moving on & leave him in the dust, still scrambling for change to feed his addiction.
Try to think of yourself as visibly powerful when people try to take you down like this. Like when you're out running, asserting your physical being in the world. Or striding down the street, looking good. Or on a purposeful errand. You are emanating an energy & self-sufficiency that makes those lower in self-esteem & power feel uneasy. Yelling something is their feeble attempt at getting even with you, since they are unable to do it in any other way.
To put it briefly: Own your power. Take it back from them.
You still rule. The words didn't change anything.
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I just want to say what a true, insightful, intelligent and empowering response this is. Thank you for sharing. 
__________________
"If you do not change direction, you may end up where you are heading." - Lao Tzu
Disclaimer: I'm a horrible speller and no longer feel like proof reading my posts. So, yeah....
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