So far off track....how do I start again???? - 3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community

odonnela · 03-08-2011, 12:53 PM

Soooooo here it is my birthday.....39 (for the first time). Next year is the big 4-oh and I would like to finally have control over my weight. I had done real well, lost weight then about year ago I lost some motivation and stalled. Well since November I am up like 30 lbs and eating anything and everything in sight. I am so far off track I can't even remember what I ate to lose!!! I don't want to hit 300 again. I already had to buy some larger pants. I don't want to be a failure. That was the only time I had ever lost and I thought I was invinceable - I'll never be one of those gainers - yeah, so not true - I am like everyone else who fails. I want to eat all the time. If I am not eating I am thinking about eating. I have a desk job and a private office which makes it easy to eat. A positive (you could say) is I don't have kids so I don't have to consider their nutritional needs or food wants in structuring an eating plan. My husband will roll with the punches and eat whatever I do, he does not care one way or the other. I am eating nothing but white stuff, fat, carbs and candy it seems!!! How in the world do I get started in a healthy lifestyle again? I had never lost weight except this time so I don't know how to get back on track...I can't even say I am one of those people who can lose but not keep it off because for the past year I was having trouble losing anything and then I gained 30 lbs back. Help.......

nationalparker · 03-08-2011, 01:27 PM

Hey - you're NOT a failure! You're still concerned with what you're eating and getting healthier, so that right there eliminates the failure thoughts!

Look at the next meal and then the one after that, and the next time you can choose to be more active, let every success build upon the previous one. Don't wait to have a "perfect" week to feel good about something ... those weeks are few and far between for everyone. But really take pride in the small successes that make up our days.

Can you bring in a bag of fruit - things you like, maybe not necessarily the standard oranges/apples/bananas, but include those if you can - and start with a full fruit bowl on your desk on Monday and aim to have it emptied by Friday when you leave? Add whatever fruits you want - grapes, kiwi, nectarines, etc.

Break up your goals into a LOT of mini goals - then you're still feeling successful as you tick off the "I DID IT" every few weeks. Don't have all of them be weight-related - make some activity-related so you're in COMPLETE control of at least a few

Focus on healthy marketing - that will make meal prep so much easier and less stressful for you. I'm one who uses very few processed foods, so I'm in control of what we eat, but it also means that nearly everything needs to be prepped in advance. Do you have the time to prep main dishes every few days or on the weekend, so you're not time-crunched when you get home from work?

WHY do you want to lose weight? Write down EVERY reason you can think of - from the healthy-lofty thoughts we say/feel to the vain ones

... look at this list often and keep reminding yourself why you don't need to drive thru anywhere ... why cake is not your true choice...why - whatever.

A couple of things I picked up from the Beck's Diet Solution book that I especially liked were to say So What - (as in, someone brought in coffee cake. ... so what? ... I don't need it, so what if it's there) ... as well as just saying Not a choice (it's not something I'm going to give into now) ... i know i've altered these to MY thought process, but it works for me. And finally, give yourself CREDIT for good choices, good thoughts you have every single day. ... What have you done well today? What did you pass up? What did you bring that was healthy? Did you start out with a good breakfast? Give yourself credit for that.

You can do this - one choice at a time. One meal, one hour, one choice, one day, at a time. Build upon your successes and lean on those for support who will support you!!

Being overweight is hard ... losing weight is hard ... maintaining your weight is hard... you have to pick your hard.

Rana · 03-08-2011, 02:01 PM

I would figure out why you started to eat all the white stuff first. Was it related to stress? Was it just feeding into a bad habit you developed? Is it addictive for you?

I think depending on where you fall in the spectrum of why you started to gain the weight back, you can begin to change your way of eating again. The thing is, if your eating is psychologically motivated because of stress or it's emotional eating, then you are going to have to deal with those issues at the same time you change your eating plan, otherwise you'll find yourself back to square one again.

If it's a series of a bad habits that have snowballed into 30 lbs, then you can focus on changing your bad habits to good habits to get you back on track.

Did you keep a food diary? You can look back at what you were eating to get ideas on what to do today. Chances are, those were foods that you liked and satisfied you and you can try that again.

If not, then start like we all start.... figuring out what works and what doesn't work. Make a plan. Figure out what you want to eat. Write it down. Follow the plan today. Don't think about tomorrow or next week or the party you have to attend next month. Just focus on today. What are you going to do for lunch/dinner? Do you have healthy foods at home/work? Did you chuck out the unhealthy foods at home/work?

beerab · 03-08-2011, 02:19 PM

You just have to grit your teeth and do it. Even if you wind up pissed off at yourself for days JUST DO IT. Seriously that's what I had to do after I gained like 15 lbs back! I've lost it all and am actually like 2 lbs lighter than that and everyday I push to stay on track BUT I get it done.

Time to tell yourself no more wasting time and move forward!

Good luck

marianne78 · 03-08-2011, 02:48 PM

Just like what Rana said, you start where we all start and find out what works for you. I'd add to that making small changes that you can do today, like getting rid of the junk food in your house. Then you can have a healthy dinner tonight. Once you've got the hang of that, make another change, like reducing your carbs or counting your calories. Small changes like these snowball into real results if you are consistent with them.

shannonmb · 03-08-2011, 05:41 PM

Okay,

1) Pick your plan. Do you have any health concerns (PCOS, apple shape, insulin resistant, diabetes) that make low carb a good option for you? If not, then maybe a more moderate carb plan will work well for you. I personally count calories with a nod toward complex carbs, lean proteins, whole foods, lots of veggies and some fruit. Are you an exerciser? Can you start to incorporate something moderate at first. I personally had to get my eating overhauled for a good couple months before I could really start committing to exercising regularly. I just tried to move more at first. Others find that starting with the exercise right away keeps them accountable with food choices. Which do you think would be better for you? What you can REALLY commit to right now.

2) Go to the grocery store. Some people feel it's helpful to totally purge all the sugary/white stuff out of the house. I just worked around it. But ESSENTIAL to have everything you need to get started all at your fingertips.

3) Hold on tight. If you are anything like me, when I first started out I had some pretty intense cravings right off. But maybe 3 weeks in I really started to notice that I was not dreaming of food every minute of the day. Sometimes now I have to remind myself meal time is coming! Don't get me wrong, I still get urges at times. But very MANAGEABLE urges. In my opinion (and this isn't for everyone), someone who REALLY likes the white stuff can sorta be addicted to it, and once you "detox" from it, much smoother sailing. Nowadays I can even have a treat every once in a while without it derailing me. But I am VERY careful with those, and do it only rarely, NOT because someone brought cookies to work, but YES, when my hubs took me to a fabulous dinner for my big 4-0 a couple weeks ago.

I hope this helps!!!

odonnela · 03-09-2011, 01:17 PM

Thanks so much everyone - am going to get my notebook out and see what I was eating that made me successful, start walking again and start drinking protein shakes again.

JohnP · 03-09-2011, 01:42 PM

When I'm having difficulty I remind myself of the reasons I'm doing this.

I personally have some powerful motivating forces as I'm sure you do as well but from time to time I need to remind myself of what they are.

SCraver · 03-09-2011, 01:49 PM

It helps me to have things I can focus on in the short term and goals to shoot for in the long term. So... right now I am training for a triathlon - that is my long term goal. It makes me work out very regularly b/c I am focused on achieving that goal. Then, on a day to day basis, I am working on separating my emotions from food. I am trying to find new outlets for my emotions and stress. I have taken up cross-stitching. It is hard to eat and cross-stitch at the same time! And it is something I can do while hubby and I watch TV.

So - maybe something like your walking - have a goal to be able to walk 'X' miles at a time by 'Y' date. That way you are working towards something - and it is something that you have more control over. Then maybe find something you can do on a day to day - like you said writing in your notebook.