I'm so sorry you are running yourself ragged over there. I can relate to the stress as well. We just moved my grandmother here from Arizona because her doctor was trying to kill her, and it has been ****. I'm a single mom, working a full time job-- and I also live with my mom, my brother, his daughter, my grandmother, and of course, my daughter. It's a big house, but not THAT big, and I find myself to be the only person cleaning the house.
Actually.. trying to clean the house it more like it. To be fair, my grandmother has been in the hospital/rehab for two weeks now.. my mom goes every day to visit her... I've let her off the hook. But my brother- does nothing. And I've afraid that I'm either going to eat a box of donuts, or completely spaz out on him. (He actually threw a fit today because my mom asked him to clean off the back steps of ice- after she just fell down them and hit her head on the steps!)
Sometimes I want to take a pillow.. and when he's sleeping.... well.... atleast smack him with it
Anyway, do remember that you can only take care of others as much as you take care of yourself. You aren't doing anyone any favors if you aren't taking care of yourself. It had taken me a LONG LONG time to realize that and really apply it. I've always had every excuse in the world for not exercising. Most of it revolved around my daughter's schedule after I picked her up from school. There is only a short window of time for dinner, homework, bath, snuggle time, and bed, you know?!
But everyday I have been taking 30 mins to myself to exercise. (And actually, my little 4 year old daughter usually joins me!) Because I am no good to her if I am not here for here 10, 20 or 30 years from now! It's such a scary thought- especially since my father passed when he was 53. I'm still mad at him for not being here because he didn't take care of himself!!!
So...I don't know how the care and school and therapies are divvied up, but maybe you and your husband need to sit down and rearrange things so that you can have a little time to yourself. (And find time to sleep!!)
I also want to recommend you a book called "100 Days of Weight Loss" by Linda Spangle. She literally goes through 100 days with you. Each day with a different topic, different things to think about, each day has a different approach to try, and journaling to do. I'm on day 21. It's been really helpful. I almost am kind of at peace with my "dieting." Instead of being like "Well poo.. I'm on a diet and I can't eat anything and I'm miserable!!" now I just feel like.. this is how I eat now. It's different. And weird
Also, if you need some further stress relief, feel free to hop a bus up to Philly, you can help me kick my brother's butt.