So, I'm excited about my progress. I have been working at this for a while and have gotten to that sweet spot where I can work in a party and still remain on plan for that week. I also don't have that urge to keep eating the higher calorie stuff after the party and for days after. It doesn't derail me. I feel the pull to get back on my healthy eating with my next meal. It's a great place to be because I'm not always fighting off cravings and the call of whatever fast food or junk at the store. I can see results in the mirror and am intrigued to see what will happen to my body with the next ten pounds.
so, you say, what could possibly be the problem? Well, I have this horrible habit of comparing myself to other people. I have a friend who I admire (she eats healthy and works out, great example) and I have kind of made her my goal. We are the same height and have the same body shape (pear). I guess I was thrown when we were having a conversation about fitness goals and she was describing her goals and where she's come from. Her starting size (12) is my current goal size (almost). She said she was way too heavy and thought she was chubby. Ack! What? She doesn't look too skinny. She looks nice and healthy and fit. She's a size 4, though, and I was aiming for a 10 or a 12 as an intermediate goal.
It just reminds of how I look in the mirror and I think I look good and then I see pictures of that day or night and I wonder "How did I not see how heavy I look?" Why do I see something different in the mirror versus the camera? Why have I lost over thirty pounds and suddenly the changes I've been seeing in the mirror seem like minor changes? Why am I letting this conversation we had cause a calorie creep in my diet?
I need to shake off this head game I have going on; I've got goals to reach. But on the other hand I feel like I let my excitement dim a little and I don't know why.