I went through the same thing a few years ago when I lost weight. I went from 215 to 135, and I still felt disgusting. I gained it all back and much more, and now when I look at pictures of 135 (I was verging on bony) I wish I had been able to see myself clearly then.
I don't have any advice except to keep staring at those before and afters for now. And then when you're closer to goal, look at pictures of yourself compared to people you consider to be normal-looking (NOT celebrities, obviously). It'll start to sink in that you're the same size as them.
Oh, it does sink in. By Autumn 2004 I'd lost 106/122lbs, went on a holiday to Europe and felt absolutely fantastic 100% of the time.
Unfortunately, I also felt complacent, so didn't lose the remaining 16, went on to regain 89 and hey.
So I would say, Yes, it will sink in but never, ever cease to be amazed by what you've achieved. For me, when I stopped being impressed with myself, I stopped trying too.
Brit - after losing that much did you have a lot of extra skin? Because you look great in your photo. Great definition in your arms etc. If you did, can you please share the workout routine you used to tone it all up?
I lost 27 pounds last year.
Most days I think I made no progress at all.
Sometimes it sinks in and then I forget.
But when I look at my face in the mirror, I look a LOT different.
And my hands and arms are much thinner.
My shoes have all grown wider over the last year too. All by themselves in the dark closet.
That has nothing to do with any weight loss. LOL.
I have started a whole new diet for 2011. And I hope to lose 50 pounds this year.
After I lose another 50 pounds, I bet I will still think I made no progress.
Brit - after losing that much did you have a lot of extra skin? Because you look great in your photo. Great definition in your arms etc. If you did, can you please share the workout routine you used to tone it all up?
thanks..well im actually just now starting to tone..dnt let the pic fool u i have extra skin i need to get rid of..but insanity is a great program to get upperbody defination
I've lost 115 pounds, and it hasn't really sunk in. Every so often, I try to remind myself how amazing it is.
I don't have a very good sense yet for how big/small I am. I was fortunate to be able to augment my wardrobe through "closet shopping" (I weighed about what I do now in the mid 1980's, in my mid 20's), and I've only bought four clothing items so far: two shirts, a robe, and a sweater, all size medium (8/10). It still doesn't quite feel real. One thing I've noticed: sometimes I'll head to the scale and guess what I'll weigh, and I'll say to myself "Probably 246" when I really mean 146.
I'm still kind of thick in the waist, which is very noticeable to me when I look in the mirror, but it doesn't really cause me any distress. I think I'm fortunate in that, while it will probably take me most of this year to get used to my new body, my reaction to it is mainly that it's interesting in a science-experiment kind of way...it's not really playing games with my mind in a bad way.
Maybe 65% of the time, I'm comfortable in the new body & I recognize that I look quite different, so different that people who knew me very casually years ago often don't recognize me when we meet again. They do a visible double take. Then the compliments. Which are nice. But it's disorienting because they are perfectly recognizable to me, while for a moment, I'm unseen by them, observing them like a stranger. Okay, this is going to sound melodramatic, but it's like I died & then came back to my former life as someone else who has watched a lot of movies of Saef's life.
I caught the program "I Used to Be Fat" on MTV while channel-surfing the other day and my reaction was uneasiness, the way I used to feel when I was still fat & I heard or read of others losing weight. Like this was an undone task that I still hadn't completed. I had to remind myself that I had, in effect, done what the young girl had done, over a much, much longer period of time. So I had nothing to feel guilty or bad about.
The most interesting thing to me is how very precarious my self-image is. If I feel low in spirits, I feel fat. If I'm housebound for a good part of a day, because of the weather, or because I'm working from home on my laptop, and lounging around in ratty clothes, I feel fat. I feel fat when an extremely slender woman walks by. I feel fat momentarily at the gym.
The thing I seem to have trouble wrapping my mind around is that "feeling fat" is different from "being fat" & that my body does not puff up & thicken dramatically during those bad & unhappy moods of mine.
I used to sneer silently to myself when a really slender girl told me that she was having a "fat day" or "felt fat." I was thinking: "As if! You have never worn anything higher than a size 4 in your life. Don't talk to me, in my size 22 jeans."
But I get it now. I really do. And I'm sorry for the uncharitable thoughts that I used to have. (A little sorry, anyway.)
I will always be "fat" to some degree, if I consider "fat" a state of mind or a mood, and my emotional vocabulary to describe those states doesn't get more sophisticated & precise. In reality, what I mean is I feel "awkward," "out-of-place," "unkempt," "bored and sleepy," "a little too full after a meal, and repentant for what I just ate," "really tired & heavy-limbed." But I associate all those states with "being fat."
[Sorry for the novel but your question was just so interesting to me ....]
Saef, yes to all of that. I too am sorry for some of the uncharitable thoughts I've had toward thin people. I get it now to a degree. The difference between me now and people who never been thin is that I think (hope) I will never make an "I feel fat" comment in front of anyone outside of the select few I know will understand. In fact, off hand, I can't think of anyone in my life who would understand that right now.
My fat moments seem to come when I'm wearing clothes that don't fit right. When I sit and feel the muffin top puff out, I feel fat. Who wouldn't? At the gym, I hate those darn mirrors! There's one particular machine I find myself on often that sits between mirrors, so the image is double your size! That machine is torture because I have to constantly remind myself that isn't me. When I stand and catch myself in the mirror, I love what I see. When I sit, like on the spin bike, the upper belly still pops out and bam, I'm fat again. It's ridiculous. I will feel fat after eating something unhealthy, even in small quantities or next to anyone who's really small.
I recognize I've lost a lot of weight. But 80+ pounds? The reality of that has not sunk in. It feels like 20. There are days I feel like I could still lose 100 pounds. The numbers are hard to wrap the brain around. It is mind boggling that I really only need to lose less than 20. I haven't had to lose so little in a very, very long time. I remember when I used to think 50 was an unbelievable amount of weight to need to lose. Now 100 doesn't seem like so much. I'm not sure when that shift happened.
I just hit my halfway mark and I don't even think about what I have lost. I am thinking of what I have to lose. Sometimes you really just have to stop and think of what you have accomplished.
my tiny friend told me how much she weighed (88 lbs) and I was amazed how tiny she was. Then it dawned on me that i've lost about 84 lbs, that's a whole person! It's daunting when i made that connection, i was carrying around a cute little asian girl on my body for 2 years! not cool.
my tiny friend told me how much she weighed (88 lbs) and I was amazed how tiny she was. Then it dawned on me that i've lost about 84 lbs, that's a whole person! It's daunting when i made that connection, i was carrying around a cute little asian girl on my body for 2 years! not cool.
Therex, your progress is amazing and the way you put that thought is hilarious! I have 2 dogs about 20 lbs each. Carrying one in each arm is how much I've lost. Not hot.
I've just read all the posts in this thread. I would have to say that I still feel fat. But I am still fat. I lost 120 some pounds once when I was in my early thirties. As soon as I got to my goal I started gaining it back. When I see pictures of a fatter me I still feel the shame and embarrassment I did then. When I see pictures of a thinner me I feel shame and embarrassment that I wasn't able to keep it off. Does anyone know of a book that would help reframe the way I think?
Last edited by kittycarlson; 02-03-2011 at 10:09 AM.
At the gym, I hate those darn mirrors! There's one particular machine I find myself on often that sits between mirrors, so the image is double your size! 
That machine is torture because I have to constantly remind myself that isn't me. When I stand and catch myself in the mirror, I love what I see. When I sit, like on the spin bike, the upper belly still pops out and bam, I'm fat again. It's ridiculous. I will feel fat after eating something unhealthy, even in small quantities or next to anyone who's really small.
