[Sea]

Originally Posted by Eliana

In the end, it's all about finding what works for us as individuals, quirks and all.

This is the key. For some of us, obsessing on what we are trying to accomplish, and the details of getting there, are the only way we can keep OP. Many of us no longer have the luxury of having a choice about how hard we work toward goal; health issues have dictated otherwise. The importance of success is critical and immediate.

It's great that even though we have different goals and routes to get to them, here we can encourage one another. May you each reach your goal in a way that you can feel good about.

[shcirerf]

All very interesting. Thanks ladies.

What prompted me to wonder, was a mag article I read. After some research, it said that men and women approach the whole process much differently on an emotional/mental level.

Basically it said that a man might have a slice of pizza and a beer. Get up the next morning, wander naked to the bathroom, pee and then weigh, if he's up a pound, he'll grunt, scratch himself and decide to run an extra mile and not think another think about it.

The woman in the same situation, will go through a whole barrage of negative thinking, wail, whine, and figure they'll never lose the weight unless all the eat is lettuce leaves and carrot sticks the rest of their lives, while running a marathon every day.

Anyway, that was the gist of the article, that started my pondering on do we make it harder than it needs to be.

[mkendrick]

I don't think there's a question that men and women approch weight loss (among, well, practically everything else) on a totally different level. That's not a blanket statement, there are some women who have very male-ish ways of thinking about certain things and vice versa. I'm fairly girly, and I definitely have a guy-ish approach to a lot of things.

For one, it's no secret, as politically incorrect as it may be, there's more pressure on women to be attractive than there is on guys. We tend to base much more of our self worth, self esteem, etc on our appearance. Add that to the already more emotional creature that is the woman, and you have a complex sensitive subject.

I think that's why so many of us gals encounter problems with our guys during the weight loss process. We might need more support from them, more understanding, etc. They just don't get it. Guys see a problem/solution situation. We tell them we're overweight and need to lose it. So in the guy mind it's "Problem: overweight. Possible solutions: 1) stay fat and happy 2) eat less and lose the weight. Easy, uncomplicated situation...so why is she such a nutcase about it???"

[moon safari]

Originally Posted by carter

Well the things I am trying to do differently with my weight loss this time around are (1) be okay with not being flawless and still carry on with my plan after I slip up; and (2) keep it simple, stupid. Don't be a lazy pig, carter, just eat less and exercise more....I tend to burn out on it and move on to other enthusiasms and obsessions. So this time around, I had to make my weight loss plan not depend on that sort of precise thinking and tracking.

THIS so freaking much. I wanted to answer you but I couldn't make myself understood to the extent I wanted to but Carter's reply is spot-on for me, personally.

[moon safari]

Originally Posted by shcirerf

The woman in the same situation, will go through a whole barrage of negative thinking, wail, whine, and figure they'll never lose the weight unless all the eat is lettuce leaves and carrot sticks the rest of their lives, while running a marathon every day.

Also, I think that a lot of that difference comes from expected gender behavior. Not to get too socio-cultural about it but men are far less pressured to be thin than women are. Their pressure comes from being expected to be fit and in shape but even then it's not near as much pressure as women get. Plus you have to think that in this society a fat woman is treated exponentially worse than a fat man. Building on that, it's no wonder obsession becomes normalized because you're already a woman so you better not be fat or god help you.

/ranting