Where I am right now
A couple of weeks ago I realized that I am battling sever depression right now. This is something I go through now and again, though sometimes it takes me a while to realize what is going on and just how deep in I am. I am to the point where I need medication, but I keep having setbacks as far as even getting an appointment to see a doctor. At this point, the earliest appointment I can get is November 17th.
When I realized what was going on, I decided to put my weight loss on hold so that I would have one less source of stress in my life. Unfortunately, I turned to my old methods and started using food to cope (though it doesn't help). At the same time, I stopped exercising...mostly because it was such an effort to do small stuff like get out of bed or shower, so exercising was just too much for me. I just couldn't manage it.
I stepped on the scale today to see that I am up 8.6 lbs from a few weeks ago. It's upsetting, but I know it's fixable. I am going to try to start eating right again, and hopefully that will help a tiny bit with how I'm feeling right now. I'm hoping that realizing that the food hasn't been helping will help me to stay on track. I know rational thought doesn't always make a difference when dealing with depression, but I'm giving it a try. We'll see how it goes.
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