what you see vs what the mirror says vs what others see

  • Just something I've been thinking about lately.

    There are times when I'll be wearing something, and without looking in the mirror (just looking down and checking myself out) I'll think I look pretty good... then I DO look in the mirror, and am totally grossed out because I look HORRIBLE (body-wise, not face). Or the opposite, I put something on just to put it on... look in the mirror, and am like... "ooh... hot mama..."

    And then there's the whole thing of what other people see... whole 'nother ball game.


    Anyone else notice this?

    This morning for example, I was undressing to take a shower. Not looking at a mirror, I just looked at myself. All I could see were fat rolls, stretch marks, and my couple belly freckles... disgusting. I then look up in the mirror and see the start of a collar bone, a small glimpse of what my stomach might look like when fully shrunk, etc.

    It was kinda nice... but at the same time... kinda not. Urgh... I overthink things WAY too much.



    So yeah... share your stories of what YOU saw vs what you saw in the MIRROR vs what OTHERS saw. Or at least... your thoughts on the matter.
  • There's a bit of a discussion along the same lines going on at: http://www.3fatchicks.com/forum/100-...ant-i-see.html right now...
  • oh gosh yes! I think so many of us struggle with this issue. When I do catch a glimpse of the new thinner me, it is usually replaced by an image of "fat me" almost instantly. I am constantly asking my husband, "is she my size, is her stomach smaller?" It is really hard to realize how others are seeing you. Remember that YOU are your worst critic. What you think is a horrible imperfection is probably not even being noticed by others. Take lots of progress pictures and try to be kind to yourself
  • yep, I do this too. It's amazing how much my mood can affect what I see in the mirror. and if the eating/exercise is going well, I feel much better about how I look too. I can be the same weight, or within a couple of lbs, but struggling with the eating/exercise and see EVERY FLAW and feel I look GIGANTIC. Sigh.

    I agree that we tend to be our own worst critics. I'm much tougher on me about my flaws than probably other people are. I do wonder what it will be like to be down 50.
  • It's funny but if I'm not feeling great about my body on a certain day and I look in the mirror and start analyzing myself, I feel like I look just about the same weight as I started with. I know in my mind that 50 lbs are gone but I still see them on myself on those "fat" days.

    When you mention stuff like that to other people they think you're crazy. You really are your worse critic but it's not always bad.It keeps us on track!
  • yes, this happens to me too. it's like this strange sort of back and forth where you notice one positive thing and then one negative thing. it can be hard because the negative things sometimes make me feel like i might never get where i am going. but then the positive things make me feel like i am making progress and can see a light at the end of the tunnel, a very long tunnel, but still. i try as best i can to hold on to the positive things, like they are hints of what is to come. but i know it can be hard. hang in there.
  • My experience has been a little different. When I look in the mirror I actually feel really good about where my body is and I'm starting to love the way that I look in my clothes. My problem is when I'm out and about and amongst other people, I look at other girls and I still feel like I'm much much heavier than they are.

    People are giving me compliments left and right. My tops are a size S/M and my bottoms are a size 6, and as of today my BMI is officially in the normal range. But when I'm standing next to another girl I still feel as if I was back at my starting weight and size.

    I really believe that the mental struggle of losing weight is much more difficult that the physical struggle.
  • I experienced this last weekend. We went to the beach and everyone wore bikinis. I was really feeling disgusted with myself and felt I looked like a beach whale. My sister and younger niece kept telling me I looked good. But I didn't believe it or see it. Then, later when I saw some of the pics from that day, I was like "wow, I did look pretty good". Now I've been kicking myself for feeling so self-conscious. And I want to go back so I can rock a bikini with confidence!!
  • i already answered the original poster, upthread, but just wanted to take a moment to congratulate hopeful8.

    Quote: People are giving me compliments left and right. My tops are a size S/M and my bottoms are a size 6, and as of today my BMI is officially in the normal range.
    hopeful8, that totally rocks!! congrats!!
  • It will change I promise. I used to feel that way all the time. I'd get dressed and think I looked ok then catch my reflection...

    Now days is the complete oposite. I get dressed and think I look ok and go. Then later I'll catch my reflection and am completely shocked by the thin girl staring back. It just takes time.
  • it depends for me, really. Some days I think I am smaller than what I am and then others I feel like a whale.

    my bf says he thinks I look great, but i think hes just being nice!