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Are you a thin person trapped in an obese body?

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Old 03-28-2014, 05:32 PM   #31
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When I was younger I used to have the mentality that I had a "skinny brain" trapped in a "fat body" and that I had been punished with being fat forever because no matter how hard I tried I NEVER lost weight.
By "trying" I mean going into anorexic periods all throughout middle school and high school, because that's the only way I thought would help me lose.

This was before I knew anything about calorie counting, nutrients, or how my body really worked, or the fact that everybody loses weight differently and that everyone is overweight from different causes.

I've also been one with a lot of model-thin friends. The only few friends I had in high school who were fat were binge eaters, which I would not consider myself to be. (I ate normal and sometimes large portions of bad things and PCOS combo, but I don't really recall binge-eating.)
Back then I couldn't understand that or had never really read stories about binge-eaters and everything behind it, so I just thought those friends were the "typical fat girl" and because I wasn't a binge-eater I wasn't really a "fat" person.
This thinking was even worsened by all of the doctors and nutritionists that my parents took me to while growing up. We would tell the doctor or nutritionist that once I hit puberty I gained an extreme amount of weight around my stomach despite not changing my diet to go from "chubby" to morbidly obese in less than a year, I had terrible acne, hair growth, I felt exhausted all the time. (HELLO!!! Major sign of PCOS here!?!?)
Rather than checking my hormones and testing me, they would simply INSIST that I was basically stuffing my face with fast food all the time and that I only needed to change the way I was eating and "do sports".
I think these experiences also instilled that whole "I don't eat like the 'typical' fat person does, so I'm not really a fat person mentally, but I'm doomed to be a fat person physically forever."
This was some of the most aggravating, frustrating, and depressing times of my life and I'm glad that things are different now.

But the moral of the story is, despite thinking this way initially, I've come to realize that no one is really meant to be a "fat person" or a "skinny person".
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Old 03-28-2014, 05:41 PM   #32
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I don't think I've ever thought of myself as either naturally fat or naturally slim.

My weight has yo-yoed within a 30-50-pound range throughout most of my postpubertal life. I've always viewed my weight as the direct result of my eating habits. When I overeat (massively), I gain. When I eat at a deficit, I lose. When I eat moderately, I maintain.

I don't mean to offend anyone, but I still find it difficult to believe that some people have trouble losing weight despite eating very little, perhaps because my own experience has been so dramatically different. The relationship between my food intake and my weight has always been predictable and linear. Calories in, calories out.

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Old 03-28-2014, 05:55 PM   #33
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Originally Posted by freelancemomma View Post
I don't think I've ever thought of myself as either naturally fat or naturally slim.

My weight has yo-yoed within a 30-50-pound range throughout most of my postpubertal life. I've always viewed my weight as the direct result of my eating habits. When I overeat (massively), I gain. When I eat at a deficit, I lose. When I eat moderately, I maintain.

I don't mean to offed anyone, but I still find it difficult to believe that some people have trouble losing weight despite eating very little, perhaps because my own experience has been so dramatically different. The relationship between my food intake and my weight has always been predictable and linear. Calories in, calories out.

F.

As usual, Freelance, my experience parallels yours. My body is almost textbook in how it responds to the calories w/calories out equation.
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Old 03-28-2014, 06:21 PM   #34
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Originally Posted by lightenupinmexico View Post
This is my first day here or on any weight loss forums. I'm stuck and have been stuck for over 20 years and I want to get unstuck.

I'm 66, have lived in Mexico for the last 16 years and have an absolutely fabulous life here full of great friends and wonderful things to do.

I've read through this thread and although a few of you flinch when someone says "I'm a thin woman in a fat body" that's what I feel I am. I grew up thin, in fact, they called me Twiggy in high school, was a size 7 when I married (the first time) and until I hurt my knees in an accident, I had no weight problems. I was very athletic with no impediments.

The accident happened at a bad (personal) time in my life. I was in pain and remember the day I looked in the mirror and actually noticed how much weight I'd gained. My body had never been an issue for me before then, and I don't even remember thinking "I'd better start losing this extra weight before it gets out of hand."

When my accident happened, there were no MRIs. Tests were done because I was in pain but nothing absolute was found. As the years progressed, my right knee got worse and worse to where I had to go up and down stairs on my butt. Finally, with a new job and great health insurance, my primary care physician (a woman) had hooked me up with a sports doctor who, just like all the other male doctors I'd been to, told me I had to lose weight and put me in pool therapy.

At an appointment with my primary doctor, she asked me how the therapy was going and I bust into tears saying nobody listens to me, there is something wrong inside my knee. She scheduled me for an MRI. A few days later, I got a call from the sports doc's office to come in, there was something showing on the MRI. He asked me what I was doing there and I told him about a problem with the MRI. He said, "I didn't order an MRI." I said, "I know, my doctor did." He returned sheepishly saying how very sorry he was that he hadn't listened to me - I had a broken kneecap and had been walking on it for years. I immediately had surgery to repair it.

Since then, I have had a total knee replacement on my left knee. The doctor here in Mexico made me lose 40 pounds before he would operate. It was hard but I did it. Now I need the right knee replaced too but have to lose more weight and I just can't seem to get going again.

Exercise is a real problem sometimes because I'm always in pain and after walking or riding my recumbent bike, the next day (sometimes) I can hardly walk. I do try and work through the pain but sometimes it gets the better of me. I am really looking forward to hearing from this group. I belong to a great group here, kind of like Weight Watchers, and they are very supportive but I joined 3fatchicks in hopes of finding even more support.

Sorry this was so long. Looking forward to hearing from some of you who may have had similar issues. Que le vaya bien!
I'm so sorry you had to experience all of that! I wish you lots of success with the weight loss for the knee surgery.
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Old 03-28-2014, 09:41 PM   #35
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Originally Posted by freelancemomma View Post
I don't mean to offend anyone, but I still find it difficult to believe that some people have trouble losing weight despite eating very little, perhaps because my own experience has been so dramatically different. The relationship between my food intake and my weight has always been predictable and linear. Calories in, calories out.
Same scenario for me. My weight has always reflected my eating habits.
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Old 03-28-2014, 09:53 PM   #36
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Kaplods you said just what I needed to hear, it's what I've been thinking, but couldn't come up with the right words, thanks again!
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Old 03-28-2014, 10:06 PM   #37
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To Cindy in mexico who bumped this thread. I have read some of the posts that followed you and there in lies the reason why its always better to start a new thread if you want your question answered. The posts i read had not read your posts. they jumped straight from the first post or page to writing their answers and may not have read yours. Its understandable. Reading through pages and pages of replies can get tedious.
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Old 03-28-2014, 10:14 PM   #38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by lightenupinmexico View Post
This is my first day here or on any weight loss forums. I'm stuck and have been stuck for over 20 years and I want to get unstuck.

I'm 66, have lived in Mexico for the last 16 years and have an absolutely fabulous life here full of great friends and wonderful things to do.

I've read through this thread and although a few of you flinch when someone says "I'm a thin woman in a fat body" that's what I feel I am. I grew up thin, in fact, they called me Twiggy in high school, was a size 7 when I married (the first time) and until I hurt my knees in an accident, I had no weight problems. I was very athletic with no impediments.

The accident happened at a bad (personal) time in my life. I was in pain and remember the day I looked in the mirror and actually noticed how much weight I'd gained. My body had never been an issue for me before then, and I don't even remember thinking "I'd better start losing this extra weight before it gets out of hand."

When my accident happened, there were no MRIs. Tests were done because I was in pain but nothing absolute was found. As the years progressed, my right knee got worse and worse to where I had to go up and down stairs on my butt. Finally, with a new job and great health insurance, my primary care physician (a woman) had hooked me up with a sports doctor who, just like all the other male doctors I'd been to, told me I had to lose weight and put me in pool therapy.

At an appointment with my primary doctor, she asked me how the therapy was going and I bust into tears saying nobody listens to me, there is something wrong inside my knee. She scheduled me for an MRI. A few days later, I got a call from the sports doc's office to come in, there was something showing on the MRI. He asked me what I was doing there and I told him about a problem with the MRI. He said, "I didn't order an MRI." I said, "I know, my doctor did." He returned sheepishly saying how very sorry he was that he hadn't listened to me - I had a broken kneecap and had been walking on it for years. I immediately had surgery to repair it.

Since then, I have had a total knee replacement on my left knee. The doctor here in Mexico made me lose 40 pounds before he would operate. It was hard but I did it. Now I need the right knee replaced too but have to lose more weight and I just can't seem to get going again.

Exercise is a real problem sometimes because I'm always in pain and after walking or riding my recumbent bike, the next day (sometimes) I can hardly walk. I do try and work through the pain but sometimes it gets the better of me. I am really looking forward to hearing from this group. I belong to a great group here, kind of like Weight Watchers, and they are very supportive but I joined 3fatchicks in hopes of finding even more support.

Sorry this was so long. Looking forward to hearing from some of you who may have had similar issues. Que le vaya bien!
I tried to pm you a reply but its too soon so here i go with my tips.

You don't need to exercise to lose the weight you need to lose. Just eat less. Its what i'm doing. You might find my blog thread in the link below helpful even if you are a meat eater. I list some recipes. Note that i modify what i do as i go along.

But essentially i start out figuring out maintenance calories for a sedentary lifestyle and restrict my calories to losing 1/2 pound a week which in my case was 1650. I found i lose steadily and didn't get much hunger.

I avoid hunger by putting my meals close together.

If you have trigger foods, quit them. Eat healthy low calorie foods most of all so that you can eat more and minimise hunger. That means high fibre foods. I eat whole fat dairy and everything except sweets which i completely avoid. Also you can't eat deep frieds on a regular basis or nibble away on anything. I find a structured meal routine is the best for me and i try to eat my meals around the same time each day. Lunch not too long after breakfast. I get hungry around 5pm when i usually have a glass of wine. If I wasn't drinking wine, i'd probably eat some fruit. Or start dinner earlier.

I have recently started including some protein in every meal. I think it has various benefits.

I am sorry to hear about the ordeal you've been through with your knees. The first one particularly sounds awful.

Yesterday i learned something new about the benefits of exercise. It helps the body suck up more glucose from the bloodstream which is important for avoiding diabetes. But if you have physical limitations i don't think you should worry. Just get your weight down without further injury or pain and get that operation.

Best wishes.
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Old 03-29-2014, 09:41 AM   #39
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Pattience View Post
I tried to pm you a reply but its too soon so here i go with my tips.

You don't need to exercise to lose the weight you need to lose. Just eat less. Its what i'm doing. You might find my blog thread in the link below helpful even if you are a meat eater. I list some recipes. Note that i modify what i do as i go along.

But essentially i start out figuring out maintenance calories for a sedentary lifestyle and restrict my calories to losing 1/2 pound a week which in my case was 1650. I found i lose steadily and didn't get much hunger.

I avoid hunger by putting my meals close together.

If you have trigger foods, quit them. Eat healthy low calorie foods most of all so that you can eat more and minimise hunger. That means high fibre foods. I eat whole fat dairy and everything except sweets which i completely avoid. Also you can't eat deep frieds on a regular basis or nibble away on anything. I find a structured meal routine is the best for me and i try to eat my meals around the same time each day. Lunch not too long after breakfast. I get hungry around 5pm when i usually have a glass of wine. If I wasn't drinking wine, i'd probably eat some fruit. Or start dinner earlier.

I have recently started including some protein in every meal. I think it has various benefits.

I am sorry to hear about the ordeal you've been through with your knees. The first one particularly sounds awful.

Yesterday i learned something new about the benefits of exercise. It helps the body suck up more glucose from the bloodstream which is important for avoiding diabetes. But if you have physical limitations i don't think you should worry. Just get your weight down without further injury or pain and get that operation.

Best wishes.
Thank you for your encouragement and suggestion to read your blog. I'm looking forward to more reading on this site.
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Old 03-29-2014, 09:42 AM   #40
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I'm so sorry you had to experience all of that! I wish you lots of success with the weight loss for the knee surgery.
Thank you for the kind words.
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Old 03-29-2014, 11:44 AM   #41
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Originally Posted by freelancemomma View Post

I don't mean to offend anyone, but I still find it difficult to believe that some people have trouble losing weight despite eating very little, perhaps because my own experience has been so dramatically different. The relationship between my food intake and my weight has always been predictable and linear. Calories in, calories out.

F.
Well with obesity soaring what you shouldn't find surprising is people finding it hard to not overeat. On average Americans have 77 pounds of ADDED sugar a year. That doesn't even count natural sugars in fruit.

And study after study shows many people fail on reducing calorie approaches.

A lot of people succeed on approaching things from not eating foods that make and keep them hungry.

Some do fine on everything in moderation, mny don't. So it might seem simple, just eat less. But the reality is unless taking a look at diet composition many find this very difficult to do.

Do calories matter on any approach? Resoundingly YES. I just never succeeded until I asked WHY am I hungry all the time. I choose to target the foods making me hungry, and then it was just an amazing an awesome journey after that.
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Old 03-29-2014, 04:07 PM   #42
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Yes, actually I use that phrase frequently. I was an active fit child, average sized teenager... then ballooned a whopping 60 lbs in the span of a few short months as a very young adult. Been that way for 10 years now, however, my mentality has led to issues losing the weight. Inside I still FEEL like my "normal" young fit self. If I am not actively thinking about it or participating in super active situatiobs, I forget what I've become. Very odd to have to make a conscious effort to remember what you're not any longer.
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Old 03-30-2014, 10:40 AM   #43
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<<Well with obesity soaring what you shouldn't find surprising is people finding it hard to not overeat.>>

I did NOT say this! I understand the compulsion to overeat all too well and find it a continual challenge not to overeat -- not because I'm always hungry, but because I love food. What I said was: "I still find it difficult to believe that some people have trouble losing weight despite eating very little." Not despite TRYING to eat very little, but despite ACTUALLY eating very little.

F.
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Old 03-30-2014, 11:04 AM   #44
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I think I do see myself as a thin person trapped in this body. Not because I don't see what I am but because of deep down inside of me I want to do things I can't in this body.

I have always wanted to be fit. I wanna run, climb mountains, be a flexible yoga queen. I like fitness. I even like healthy foods. I feel like that person is who I really am, I have just pushed her down, hidden her away & shut her up with cake. It is not so much about my weight ofcourse but all the issues, confidence, that come with it.

But I think part of this weight loss journey is letting my true self be free.

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Originally Posted by freelancemomma View Post
<<Well with obesity soaring what you shouldn't find surprising is people finding it hard to not overeat.>>

I did NOT say this! I understand the compulsion to overeat all too well and find it a continual challenge not to overeat -- not because I'm always hungry, but because I love food. What I said was: "I still find it difficult to believe that some people have trouble losing weight despite eating very little." Not despite TRYING to eat very little, but despite ACTUALLY eating very little.

F.
I agree with you to a point. I think at its most basic level it is about calories. Eat less you will lose. But... there is health issues & bodies working different. I have PCOS and it makes it a bit more difficult. I mean it is like you take two people of the same height, weight, body shape, age, gender and give them the same calories. One might have the weight just slide right off like magic and the other person, while still losing weight it won't be coming off as quickly.

How fast we lose can play such a role for alot of us motivation wise.

I remember my sister & I were trying to lose together. I was being hyper vigilant, counting every calorie, eating healthy, exercising. I was quite a bit smaller then my sister to start with. I was losing .5lb-1lb. My sister barely changed her diet, no fitness, was still eating alot of very bad things and was losing 3-7lbs. It can suck lol

We are not all the same for sure!
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Old 03-30-2014, 11:14 AM   #45
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I've definitely always felt like I'm in the wrong body. My confidence level was always really really high for many years eventhough I was overweight. I was confident that I was beautiful, that my smile was terrific, that my hair was luscious, that my skin was enviable, and I got lots of attention for my beauty. I always felt so good and yet pictures of myself seemed like foreign to me, that's not me!! Eventually those pictures and constantly comparing myself to my skinny friends broke down my confidence and now my appearance and self esteem match.

Quote:
Originally Posted by lightenupinmexico View Post
This is my first day here or on any weight loss forums. I'm stuck and have been stuck for over 20 years and I want to get unstuck.

I'm 66, have lived in Mexico for the last 16 years and have an absolutely fabulous life here full of great friends and wonderful things to do.

I've read through this thread and although a few of you flinch when someone says "I'm a thin woman in a fat body" that's what I feel I am. I grew up thin, in fact, they called me Twiggy in high school, was a size 7 when I married (the first time) and until I hurt my knees in an accident, I had no weight problems. I was very athletic with no impediments.

The accident happened at a bad (personal) time in my life. I was in pain and remember the day I looked in the mirror and actually noticed how much weight I'd gained. My body had never been an issue for me before then, and I don't even remember thinking "I'd better start losing this extra weight before it gets out of hand."

When my accident happened, there were no MRIs. Tests were done because I was in pain but nothing absolute was found. As the years progressed, my right knee got worse and worse to where I had to go up and down stairs on my butt. Finally, with a new job and great health insurance, my primary care physician (a woman) had hooked me up with a sports doctor who, just like all the other male doctors I'd been to, told me I had to lose weight and put me in pool therapy.

At an appointment with my primary doctor, she asked me how the therapy was going and I bust into tears saying nobody listens to me, there is something wrong inside my knee. She scheduled me for an MRI. A few days later, I got a call from the sports doc's office to come in, there was something showing on the MRI. He asked me what I was doing there and I told him about a problem with the MRI. He said, "I didn't order an MRI." I said, "I know, my doctor did." He returned sheepishly saying how very sorry he was that he hadn't listened to me - I had a broken kneecap and had been walking on it for years. I immediately had surgery to repair it.

Since then, I have had a total knee replacement on my left knee. The doctor here in Mexico made me lose 40 pounds before he would operate. It was hard but I did it. Now I need the right knee replaced too but have to lose more weight and I just can't seem to get going again.

Exercise is a real problem sometimes because I'm always in pain and after walking or riding my recumbent bike, the next day (sometimes) I can hardly walk. I do try and work through the pain but sometimes it gets the better of me. I am really looking forward to hearing from this group. I belong to a great group here, kind of like Weight Watchers, and they are very supportive but I joined 3fatchicks in hopes of finding even more support.

Sorry this was so long. Looking forward to hearing from some of you who may have had similar issues. Que le vaya bien!
I'm so glad you spoke up for yourself and finally got the MRI that you needed. Doctors can be so obtuse sometimes!!! I remember my doctor wouldn't listen to me after I gave birth I was still having symptoms of SPD in my pelvis and she kept telling me it would go away on its own. Months turned into years and when my son turned 2yrs old my husband took a good hard look at me and said "Why are you still limping?" I had been living with so much pain and so little ability to even walk and yet nobody cared, no doctor would listen to me. Finally I found the right kind of doctor (Osteopath) who helped me with manipulative treatments and sent me to PT. After only 6months of PT I'm finally able to walk again without pain. So I understand perfectly, when something is wrong and nobody believes us the only person that feels that pain is US!
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