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i was on Day 3 and i JUST BLEW IT!! :(

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Old 06-30-2010, 10:10 PM   #1
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Unhappy i was on Day 3 and i JUST BLEW IT!! :(

i was on day 3 of eating healthy and exercising, but today my bf and i went out to eat at a restaurant and i got a juicy cheeseburger and fries and ice cream. i couldn't resist! Now hours later, I am back at home feeling miserable. That meal was the amount of calories I am supposed to eat in a DAY! i completely blew it, and didn't even exercise today either. Now I feel like I'm back to square one....




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Old 06-30-2010, 10:14 PM   #2
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You're not back to square one, by any means. The fact that you're taking note of your calories, and understanding that doing it isn't good is enough to make you have had a good day three :]
Everyone has their days where they eat a little more than they should, or don't exercise. You just need to hold your head up and push forward to tomorrow. Day 4 :]
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Old 06-30-2010, 10:16 PM   #3
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start over right away. don't let yourself get more off track.

the progress you made yesterday and the day before still count, so build on that and try not to let tonight's dinner get you too down.

just try to remember how you felt yesterday, look at your post and how happy you were when you made it through day 2.

and maybe let your bf know what you are trying to accomplish and ask him if he can be a source of support and maybe the two of you can choose a different kind of restaurant next time, or better yet, go for a walk together.

hang in there!
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Old 06-30-2010, 10:27 PM   #4
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What made you do it? I mean, what thought was going through your head when you decided to order that food?
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Old 06-30-2010, 10:29 PM   #5
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it's just so hard! do people who are trying to lose weight just not go out to eat ever? lol and no one say, "wellll there are healthy options like a light salad with fat free dressing on the side" hahha because i'm pretty sure if us diet ladies are going to splurge ONE time on our favorite restaurant, we should order what we want! that's just my opinion




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Old 06-30-2010, 10:36 PM   #6
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This is where you need to stop and THINK about why this happened and how you can prevent it in the future.

Why couldn't you resist? Is it that you were so, so hungry? Is it that you didn't want to disappoint him or have him ask why? Is it that it felt weird ordering a "healthy" option when you are a cheeseburger and fries kind of gal? Is it because it seems like a tragic missed chance to get something wonderful?

I've had all those problems. "Trying harder" won't help, if by "trying harder" you mean "Making myself feel like crap and punishing myself for a couple days with negative self talk". Lots of people (myself included) feel like they can "pay" for overeating by feeling enough guilt and shame after. But guilt and shame don't burn calories.

What you need is a plan. Your days of looking at menus in the booth are over. That's FOOD PORN. It's designed by brilliant, brilliant people--people that made 1600s on their SATs and got Ph.Ds in marketing from Ivy League schools--it's designed by people like that who have put hundreds of hours into designing something that makes you want to EAT EAT EAT EAT. The only way to win this game is not to play. Don't look at the menu.

Instead, plan in advance what you are going to eat at a time when you aren't hungry. Look at the on line menu. Then, once you know, PRACTICE YOUR ORDER. Out loud. You feel weird, but I swear this helps. Say it exactly how you want to say it to the waiter: "I'll have the blah-blah, no mayo, please, and with double steamed veggies". Keep saying it until it feels natural. Then, when you get to the place, order as quickly as possible. And DON'T LOOK AT THE MENU!

You don't need more strength, more will-power, or to try harder. You don't need more guilt or shame. You need PLANS and STRATEGIES, and when you have trouble coming up with some, come here. The people here have thousands of brilliant ones.
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Old 06-30-2010, 10:37 PM   #7
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We all have to go out to eat some time, but you have to make healthy choices (that doesn't necessarily mean a salad). You can have grilled chicken with steamed veggies. Or...a lot of restaurants post their nutritional information online so you can see the calories/fat content in the food before you go, so that way you can choose your menu ahead of time.

There is always going to be temptation, we all just have to learn to resist. Don't let one meal derail you, start again right now. Perhaps go for a walk if it isn't too late where you are. Eat healthy tomorrow, you'll feel better and back on track.
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Old 06-30-2010, 10:46 PM   #8
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I don't mean to be rude, but the only way you're going to actually lose anything is if you get your head in the game. We all have days (or even weekends/weeks) where eating healthy just doesn't happen, for whatever reason, but we need to learn to get right back up and start over if we ever want to see any progress. (Last week? I ate waffles and KFC and doritos. I'm not proud of it, but I got over it and won't make the same mistakes this week. That was actually my very first binge since the 8th) You need to be responsible for your actions, and it's going to take some mental rewriting, but you'll get it, don't worry! Just start over tomorrow, eat healthy, and exercise if you can.

I used to get obsessively hung up over the days where I had to eat fast food/whatever, too, but then I learned to just go with the flow. If you HAVE to eat something you aren't sure about, eat less, or eat an alternative. Order steamed veggies instead of taters, order grilled chicken instead of fried, or order the fish, or grilled chicken salad, etc.
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Old 06-30-2010, 10:49 PM   #9
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You haven't blown it!!!! You wake up tomorrow and make better choices and put today behind you. The reason most people fail at "dieting" is because they deprive themselves of everything they want. For me that makes it even more appealing if it is forbidden. Tonight I made the choice to fry fish instead of broil...later I regretted it but tomorrow I will not dwell on today's mistakes.

If you think of yourself as a failure you will become one. The best thing I read in your post is that you acknowledge the mistake and you still want to do well. It would have been so easy to not write about it but you did.

Tomorrow you hop back on that horse and start back towards your goal.
I can not speak for anyone but me on the eating out thing but my opinion is that you limit the number of times you eat out and when you do it is a treat and you should order what you want within reason of course.
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Old 06-30-2010, 11:05 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by neveragainbabe View Post
it's just so hard! do people who are trying to lose weight just not go out to eat ever? lol and no one say, "wellll there are healthy options like a light salad with fat free dressing on the side" hahha because i'm pretty sure if us diet ladies are going to splurge ONE time on our favorite restaurant, we should order what we want! that's just my opinion



I had to make a comment about this statement. It all depends on how often you want to be able to go to your favorite restuarant!! Personally, I'd rather be able to go out a little more often by ordering one of the more sensible (not quite the right word here) options on the menu. I enjoy the social aspects of eating out a lot, and I try to keep that the focus instead of the food.

To recap, your choices are:
1. Don't eat out.
2. Learn to eat out and stay on your plan.
3. Feel like you've "blown it" every time you go out!!

Good luck! And try some new things from your favorite places. You may find some new favorite foods.
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Old 06-30-2010, 11:10 PM   #11
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Quote:
Originally Posted by neveragainbabe View Post
it's just so hard! do people who are trying to lose weight just not go out to eat ever? lol and no one say, "wellll there are healthy options like a light salad with fat free dressing on the side" hahha because i'm pretty sure if us diet ladies are going to splurge ONE time on our favorite restaurant, we should order what we want! that's just my opinion
Honestly, when I was actively losing weight, I ate on plan - even in a restaurant. I did have one treat meal - on my birthday. Otherwise, I made healthy choices at every meal - at home, at work, in restaurants.

There are yummy on plan meals that I eat in restaurants. Are they AS YUMMY as a cheeseburger/fries/ice cream? Maybe not. Are they perfectly yummy in their own right? YES. Am I happy to have a yummy dinner in a restaurant when I don't have to cook/do dishes? YES.

I like to use the internet to plan my order before I get to a restaurant, then I am not tempted by the words/pictures in the menu, I rarely open it. I order double veggies, salad dressing on the side, light butter all the time. I rarely eat an entire restaurant portion - they are just too big to be good for me!

Now that I'm maintaining, I do have weekly treat meals. I eat a nice dinner in a restaurant and drink a glass of wine, split dessert. There are some foods I gave up forever, including fries/onion rings - I just don't eat those.

I weigh calories vs. satisfaction, fries/onion rings fail this equation (too many calories, not enough satisfaction). Some food passes this equation - chocolate molten lava cake (lots of calories, HIGH SATISFACTION). Or...birthday cake for my birthday (high calories, HIGH SENTIMENTAL SATISFACTION). Only you can run this equation for the food in your life.

I think you are going to face up to the fact there must be changes in your life if you want to lose weight and keep it off. How you order in a restaurant is one of these big changes. If you go to a restaurant once every 6 months - okay yeah, order what you want. If you are like most of the American public and eat out a LOT - you are going to have to make good choices MOST OF THE TIME to live your healthy dream.

You can rail against the universe that it is unfair and you want to order what you want, when you want. Or, you be like a lot of thin people and realize you MUST budget your calories in restaurants.
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Old 06-30-2010, 11:26 PM   #12
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Thanks for that post Glory87.
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Old 07-01-2010, 12:00 AM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Shmead View Post

I've had all those problems. "Trying harder" won't help, if by "trying harder" you mean "Making myself feel like crap and punishing myself for a couple days with negative self talk". Lots of people (myself included) feel like they can "pay" for overeating by feeling enough guilt and shame after.
This almost made me cry. I never realized that I had been doing that same thing- making myself "pay" by being shameful and guilty after a slip. But it's so true.

As these very smart ladies have already said - pick yourself up, dust yourself off, and continue on - because only you can do it.

Good luck!
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Old 07-01-2010, 08:21 AM   #14
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Here is my strategy - maybe it can help you.

1. Only go to a restaurant with nutritional info online.
2. When you are not hungry (this takes planning!), choose an item in your calorie budget.
3. Write it down and keep it. Take it to the restaurant.
4. DON'T LOOK AT THE MENU
5. Order what you wrote!

Just try it once and see if it helps.
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Old 07-01-2010, 09:34 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by neveragainbabe View Post
it's just so hard! do people who are trying to lose weight just not go out to eat ever? lol and no one say, "wellll there are healthy options like a light salad with fat free dressing on the side" hahha because i'm pretty sure if us diet ladies are going to splurge ONE time on our favorite restaurant, we should order what we want! that's just my opinion



It's funny, because in your original post you said you were MISERABLE. And than you kind of made fun of having salad, as if that's not good, as if it's boring. But since you were/are so miserable, I'm not sure what this *splurge* really accomplished for you.

Besides,*splurging* on day three? A little early in on the game, no? You have to decide what you want the MOST, because you can't have it both ways. You can't have the high calorie foods AND lose weight and be slim. It just can't be. And I too eat out in restaurants and enjoy myself immensely. I did so yesterday. Had a mega sized salad with incredible add ins. They had no lower calorie dressing - I had it without. The roasted peppers, onions, mushrooms, hearts of palm and all the other good stuff in there made it more than good enough without it. It was delicious in fact. I had a diet snapple and I was thoroughly satisfied. Enjoyed the company - and didn't come home miserable. Twas' a win/win situation

Yes, eating healthy IS a lifestyle. A darn good one.

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