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Biggest Roadblock to Losing Weight

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Old 06-23-2010, 08:33 PM   #1
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Default Biggest Roadblock to Losing Weight

So.. I've JUST had this epiphany. My biggest roadblock to losing weight is CONSTANTLY worrying about what other people think. "Look at that fat girl jiggle", "What a loser exercising by herself", "She's so ugly", "She's so fat"... etc. etc. I automatically assume that people think those types of things about me. Because I'm so concerned with these crazy ideas in my head, I make excuses to not workout and instead, I stay at home and eat all day/night.

I am completely aware these thoughts are irrational and that nobody is even paying attention to me.. but I, like most people, think the world revolves around me and I do nothing. This is mostly because I don't know how to combat these feelings. The rest of it is because I'm lazy.

So, I thought that maybe we could share our biggest roadblocks and help each other get over them.
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Old 06-23-2010, 09:00 PM   #2
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It's hard to get past that kind of thinking, I feel for you. (The only thing I've found that works is just forcing myself to do whatever it is I'm dreading. Like ripping off a band-aid!)

My biggest roadblock to losing weight is having so much to lose! Sometimes I get frustrated that I'm still so big and that I don't have steady energy throughout the day. I get spurts and then I'm exhausted and then I'll get a second wind and then feel exhausted again. I'm hoping that my energy will improve as I lose. I haven't been able to figure out what else might be dragging me down so much.
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Old 06-23-2010, 09:01 PM   #3
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My biggest road block is being all or nothing. I feel like everything has to be perfect, or it doesn't matter, it won't have the effect I want, etc.

Do you have workout clothes that you feel good in? It might help to get a set that makes you feel REALLY good about yourself so you can get out there and get it done.
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Old 06-23-2010, 09:16 PM   #4
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My biggest problem was my macho need to be "the tough one". It kept me on VLC plans for years because moderate calorie plans seemed, honestly, wimpy. If other people could eat 1200 and not give in, then, by god, I could eat 900 and not give in. Except I always gave in, after a month or a year.

On 1500-1800, I've discovered I lose weight just as quickly (honestly), and I never have off days. I have a LIFE. I could do this standing on my head. I wish I'd realized this 15 years ago.
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Old 06-23-2010, 09:28 PM   #5
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Similar to FreeSpirit, I find the all or nothing mentality to be the most cumbersome to overcome. It's honestly such a dangerous mindset to be in, particularly when you are a (happy) perfectionist in almost every other area of your life.

I've recently done A LOT of thinking and reflecting on the issue and have decided to place my dependence on a change management process that is rooted in structure and accountability (similar to one you would find in a business).

It's relieving for me to remove myself from the emotional recklessness that used to consume me to the point of abusing food (yet I still am having to learn how to deal with these emotions in a different, 'more appropriate' way).
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Old 06-23-2010, 10:04 PM   #6
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My biggest Roadblock is having alot of weight to lose. At first I thought, This is gonna take me forever to lose. But so far the weight has been coming off quickly. I just take it at 40lb increments. That way I stay more motivated.

EmusGlitter: I think those people at the gym r silently giving u the high five for actually going to the gym. I know that I'm the biggest girl at my gym but I don't care.lol. Sometimes I think that people r watching my big a$$ jiggle when I am on the treadmill walking at a fast pace.lol. But I try not to think like that cos then I don't want to work out as hard and fast. Don't let those thoughts discourage your weight loss efforts. Who cares what others think cos at least u r trying to do something about yourself for the good.
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Old 06-23-2010, 10:20 PM   #7
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My biggest roadblock.. is my past. Actually had a breakthrough a couple weeks ago with my boyfriend when we started discussing my past and I started making connections between memories and trying to really get off my chest and understand all the guilt and struggle I went through growing up (my mom kept pushing me to diet and do all this stuff because I was fat) - I started to understand where my compulsive eating comes from and even with how much I understood, there is still a lot I don't understand about certain roots of certain behaviors. (Psychoanalysis is a helluva thing)
Anyway, up until that point I would have said my biggest roadblock is my laziness and how easily I give in but now I realize it's my own degradation and unawareness of WHY I eat when I'm bored, eat socially (fear of being rude/seen differently - definitely has to do complacent attitudes instilled in me by my surroundings even though I struggle against the behavior often when I catch myself being neurotic), etc.
I don't understand how talking about something I've always somehow been aware of (guilt of eating "bad" foods only compelled me to eat when my parents weren't looking and it is a similar habit I've kept going - like when I'm alone its OK to eat bad foods and almost a given) worked but it REALLY has worked. Since then I've been sticking to my diet extremely well after a year and a half of not quite sticking with it long-term. I no longer feel as compelled to eat when I'm bored or to give in, something just.. clicked.
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Old 06-24-2010, 12:47 AM   #8
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i really hate going to the gym, like i loathe it. it's never fun, even though i switch it up. my nutritional side of my new lifestyle is okay, and i'm pretty much always on plan. but i'm lazy, and would rather spend my afternoon on the couch.
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Old 06-24-2010, 12:57 AM   #9
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My biggest roadblock is impatience with my current slow rate of losing. Last year I did not let it bother me and I just kept up my plan and eventually I lost 20 pounds. Now I'm trying to lose the last 10-20 pounds and my body is just refusing to let go of more weight. I will have to be happy with maybe a 3-4 pound loss for June and know that by the end of the year, it will again add up to my goal weight. Lord give me patience, but hurry!
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Old 06-24-2010, 04:59 AM   #10
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I don't like sweating. And then having to change and shower and wash my hair. Because I sweat a LOT when I do any exercise, and also get red and puffy, and my hair, which is thin and short, gets all damp and sticks out in weird ways. It makes me not enjoy exercising a lot.

Particularly when I am red and blotchy with frazzled hair in the gym when the cute buff rugby team guys are there, and I am next to the skinny girl in full makeup with her bouncy ponytail, who not working up any sweat at all on the exercise bike. Does anyone have any solution to that?
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Old 06-24-2010, 08:40 AM   #11
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Hmm... I would say, for me, it has definitely been the all or nothing attitude, with plenty of negative self talk thrown in for good measure. I am slowly learning that it doesn't have to be all or nothing. 30 mins at the gym can be just as good as 60.

I have also been working on changing what I say to myself...

Quote:
Originally Posted by EmusGlitter View Post
"Look at that fat girl jiggle", .
Change to "Look at how hard she is working! I am inspired!"

Quote:
Originally Posted by EmusGlitter View Post
"What a loser exercising by herself".
Change to "I wish I had the confidence to exercise by myself like she does."

Quote:
Originally Posted by EmusGlitter View Post
"She's so ugly".
Change to "She's working hard to improve herself. Good for her!"

Quote:
Originally Posted by EmusGlitter View Post
"She's so fat"
Change to "She's working so hard to get in shape!"

As silly as it sounds - say the positive things to yourself in your head. Tell yourself that THAT is what people are thinking. You might feel silly at first or not believe it at first, but the more you do it, the better you will feel - I SWEAR IT.

I often like to tell myself (while I stand at the gym in my fat pants, stretched, worn and stained with paint and my T-shirts with the sweat stains on the pits) that I am not there to win a beauty contest, I am not there to look pretty... I am there to bust my BUTT and get in shape and feel better about MYself.
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Old 06-24-2010, 09:06 AM   #12
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I totally feel you. We're getting a new building where I work and with that comes an awesome exercise room. I'm excited at the prospect of that but scared poo-less because I work with a buuuuuunch of guys (law enforcement) and don't want to look like a dip in there. Also, I really want to run but have no desire to even attempt unless it's under the cover of night which puts me out on the street either after 8pm or before 6 am.
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Old 06-24-2010, 10:50 AM   #13
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My mind. In the past negative self talk always got the best of me. Also, the all or nothing mentality - like "oh well, I am already over my calories I might as well live it up and start again tomorrow." I am over that stuff and tell myself now everyday that I can do this and if I make a mistake I admit it and move on - I don't beat myself up and punish myself with more mistakes.
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Old 06-24-2010, 10:52 AM   #14
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EmusGlitter, I've had the same concerns when exercising. I still feel it at times, and I've been at goal for a year and a half! When I get this feeling I switch my iPod to the song "The Middle" by Jimmy Eat World. It has great lyrics for this situation.

My biggest roadblock was probably just getting started. I knew I was obese for many years, but I never really did the yo-yo diet thing. I think I knew I just wasn't ready.
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Old 06-24-2010, 11:12 AM   #15
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That's a really good question for me to think about.

So many obstacles, but I think a major one is that I sabotage myself by lying to myself. I often tell myself that a binge is not a big deal and I can have one & start over the next day. The binge habit is extremely appealing to me and hard to break.

Another obstacle I'm facing now that I am nearing maintenance is fear of success. Every time I lose a pound now, I go into a binge cycle and then have to work to lose the weight again. I'm terrified of making goal for some reason. Maybe it's because I know I can lose the weight, but I don't believe that I can keep the weight off. I've never done maintenance before.
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