I'm not sure if anybody else had people say things like this to them, but I constantly had people tell me "losing weight isn't going to solve your problems" and "just because you'll be skinnier doesn't mean you'll be happier...you'll just be a hungry unhappy person." I'm not going to lie, better health was not my number one reason to lose weight. I wanted to look good because I felt that looking better would make me happier. Probably a shallow reason, but I'm sure it's not uncommon. In an ideal world, I should have been able to love myself unconditionally no matter what size I am, but I was unhappy with my reflection in the mirror and this was truly depressing for me.
Well those naysayers were wrong! I am 100% happier! Everything in my life has improved for the better. I am proud of how I look, and because of this, I actually enjoy putting myself together (doing my hair, makeup, dressing up). I've been more confident, and I've made several new friends in the last few months. I had never been a social butterfly, but all of a sudden I am one. For once, I enjoy being active and I have energy. I don't sit around all morning trying to force myself to get off the couch to go to Walmart, I wake up at 5:30am with no alarm and can't wait to get started on the day. I've learned how to cook, I've developed new tastes, I've learned loads about nutrition. With new energy and confidence and a zest for life, I'm interested in new things. I suddenly have a strong desire to play golf which is totally random, but I have signed up for a beginners clinic. I have learned to love my body. Not just how it looks, but I've learned its patterns, what effects it, how to take care of it, and how to take pride in it. My wonderful boyfriend has been deployed in Iraq since I was at my highest weight, so I haven't experienced "skinny sex" yet, but I know that'll be amazing too, haha.
My world is just better. I'm healthier, happier, stronger, more energetic, I look better, I'm more confident, and I feel like I'm experiencing life for the first time. Before, I was just existing, trudging through my days. Now, I'm living. I wake up every morning with enthusiasm and energy.
Anyways, sorry for this excessively joyful post. I ate breakfast this morning with one of those friends who told me "losing weight won't solve your problems" all those months ago. She kept picking at my (delicious) egg white, broccoli, and turkey omelet going on and on about how I must hate starving myself. It reminded me how far I've come, and how glad I am that I committed myself to getting here.