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Old 02-26-2010, 12:34 PM   #1  
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Unhappy Burst my bubble

I have been doing so well. I am only 11 pounds from my goal.

Well, one of my "darling coworkers " pulled me aside today and said "Robin, you are starting to look really drawn and sunken in. We are all really worried about you and we think you should try to put on some weight."

I was so proud of all my efforts and I am in a healthy weight range... now I am being told that I look really bad.

bubble bursted. woe is me.
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Old 02-26-2010, 12:36 PM   #2  
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The thing is that people get used to looking at you and how you look. I am just over 200 lbs yet I get people who tell me that I have lost too much weight. Uhh, what?

Keep doing what you are doing. Also, sometimes it takes a while for your face to kind of catch up and reshape itself. So don't fret.
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Old 02-26-2010, 12:40 PM   #3  
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170: I'm so sorry this happened to you. I can tell you that at 5'7" and 146 you probably look really awesome right now and your co-workers just need to adjust to your new look. I'm sure your face is a lot thinner than it used to be and they are just not used to it. Your co-workers are probably just jealous and a little bit worried because your looks have changed so much. I say hang in there and know that you look fantastic, because I'm absolutely sure you do! I'm also guessing that your co-workers probably need to lose a few pounds themselves and acting worried about your weight loss is a way of justifying their own weights.

Pam
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Old 02-26-2010, 12:44 PM   #4  
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It's just because you look different. Maybe if you do some style updates to change with your body, people won't see it negatively. People get used to how you look, but it shouldn't make you feel bad. I'm sure to any of us that don't know you, you would look great!
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Old 02-26-2010, 02:21 PM   #5  
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Several years ago, I girl I work with missed a few shifts because she'd finally escaped a very abusive husband. None of us ever noticed her bruises and sprains and limps. We felt awful!
Even though this felt kind of crappy for you ... it's sooo much better than working with folks who don't give a darn. Erroneous or not ... their concern is precious.
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Old 02-26-2010, 04:58 PM   #6  
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You should be very proud of yourself, regardless of what others tell you and regardless of their intentions. You know how you want to feel and try to just focus on that. I've had people in my own family act concerned over my weight loss and they tell me I need to stop losing. However, I tell them that according to the medical charts, I'm still considered overweight and I have a bit more to go before I reach the middle of the normal range. I'm sure that if someone who had never seen you before saw your before and after pictures, they'd be very impressed. People we know personally have all kinds of opinions but that doesn't make them right. Congrats to you! You're doing great!
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Old 02-26-2010, 05:53 PM   #7  
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Hon, when my mother lost weight, co-workers who were genuinely concerned about her would ask her "Are you okay..?", thinking that she had lost weight due to cancer or some other kind of horrible illness. And my mother looks better than she ever has. Like everyone else has said, people just aren't used to your new appearance.
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Old 02-26-2010, 06:53 PM   #8  
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I agree with everyone else, congrats on the weight loss. I don't have anything to add about co-workers or family members for that matter. All I know is that its frustrating.
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Old 02-26-2010, 07:50 PM   #9  
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i also kind of think when people are losing weight they do start to look a little drawn in the face. my husband had a period of time when he just looked like crap- like he'd had the flu ... but he just kept at it and looks much better. i think it might just be part of the weight loss process... ? i dunno.
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Old 02-26-2010, 08:11 PM   #10  
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I think they're jealous and threatened by having someone to compete with who looks as good or better than them. I got that same crap when I lost weight several years back. You can never be too thin or too rich. Enjoy every minute of it, girl!
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Old 02-26-2010, 08:28 PM   #11  
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I recently saw my sister after 9 months of just telephone convos. I knew that she had gone from 260lbs to 160lbs since i last saw her and thought i was prepared to see the change. I was prepared to be jealous that she had accomplished what i'd been trying to do my whole life. Boy was i wrong.
It was like seeing my sister in another persons body, a very diminished and almost weak looking body. I even said to myself " well if that's what you look like after losing weight then i'm staying right where i am".
Of course it was just the shock and probably also the fact she lost it too quickly IMHO. But with a bit more exercise i'm sure her body will pull together and look pretty good, she's even trying to lose another 20lbs which still keeps her in her healthy range.

I think it's always the case that if people see the ones they care about losing weight they'll be worried. It's naturally seen as unhealthy to lose wieght, despite todays brainwashing that thin is healthy.

Stick with it though, they'll get used to the new you, and i like the idea of a new style.
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Old 02-26-2010, 09:30 PM   #12  
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I had a college prof lose over a hundred pounds during one of my years at nursing school. She was a very large lady when I started school, and seeing her lose the weight slowly, it wasn't so dramatic. But it did seem after a while that she looked more drawn and grey, as if she had lost weight. I asked her how far she was from her goal, she told me she had another 50 to lose to get below "overweight" bmi.
I suggested she should start rewarding herself for her weight loss by getting her colours done and getting some new duds. We went shopping together, and let me tell you, she looked great. I also think that over time, the drawn look corrected itself better too.
This will happen for you and as long as you are eating healthy and well, you shouldn't worry.
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