[CatchABreak]

Hi
New to the forum - but desperate to talk it out.
I've been on path to self-destruction for the last couple of weeks now. I had changed my eating, started exercising, and had lost about 30kg this year.
But for some reason, I'm self-imploding at the moment I've put on about 7kg in the last 3 weeks. I binge on icecream and choc mainly. To make it even more horrid - I do my binging in secret - after my husband goes to bed.
I have an amazing supportive husband, but am so ashamed of myself at the moment that I am pushing him away.
I just don't know where to start - and how to stop - hence my cry for help!
The further I slip, the harder I am on myself, and the more depressed I am getting about the whole thing. I feel like a failure and fraud!
How do I get my life back on track?
Appreciate anyone's thoughts....

[kelly315]

I'm having the exact same issue! I've been calorie counting for about 15 months, and lost 130lbs total, but over the last month or so I've totally lost control(& gained about 15 pounds back). I thought it was because I was over-restricting, so I decided to stop counting calories for a few days- but that didn't work. Now, I'm trying to count, but I can't stop binging. I found an OA meeting and I'll be going on Weds- It's the only thing I can think of to help.

[CJZee]

Hi everyone ... first of all, pat yourselves on the back -- you have done absolutely fabulously. You know how to eat healthy and to lose weight.

You have just (for this tiny, short time) reverted to the bad habits in your past. Remember you have been building new better habits for awhile too, and they are still there, you just need to bring them forward.

When I start to veer off course, I don't judge myself or put myself down. I find that counter-productive. I try to focus on the list of habits I created to eat more healthy. I re-write them down. I re-read things that motivate me. One quote I look at from Tom Venuto's book "Feed the Muscle, Burn the Fat" is about habits:

Nature abhors a vacuum. The best way to get rid of undesirable habits such as poor nutrition or inactivity is by replacing them with new ones, not attempting to overcome them with sheer willpower. The new habit then takes over as the old one is filed away in the subconscious mind.

And I remember: You can't fail... if you don't quit.

"The future is not some place we are going, but one we create.”

All the best...CJ

[Lori Bell]

I remember when I was a teenager and I would start a diet. The VERY first time I would "go off plan" my Dad would know immediately. It used to tick me off so badly...lol How did he know? I would eat in secret, I thought I was being so sneaky...

The emotions and the attitude are the first signs! The weight comes on at a little bit slower pace....but soon, no matter how hard you try to hide it, everyone will see that you have ditched the wagon for the sugar train. The side effects, (the excess unhealthy weight and bad attitude) makes the ride pretty miserable. Sugar is evil. To regain control, you need to get it out of your diet. Doesn't sound like you are able to eat it in moderation.

Good luck.

[heather1982]

I love CJ's post, those are some great points. I agree, don't give up for the whole day if you have a slip up, just keep going and look at things as a whole. I know there are some things I would overeat, like ice cream and chocolates, so I try not to have them readily available at home. Instead, I add a more acceptable sweet to my shopping list, like the little portion controlled mini bags that are 100 calories or fat free sherbert instead of ice cream. Or I try to eat fresh fruit instead of chocolates. Or making a healthy smoothie instead of having a bowl of ice cream. You know how to lose weight and be healthier, just try to make it easier for yourself by replacing the bad foods you're craving with healthier ones that will still satisfy you.

[salsa chip]

Oh wow - don't give up! And don't push your man away

I've lost about 18kg and all I can do is bow in awe at your superior weight loss. 30kg? That is fantastic.

All right, you're back up 7kg...and that still puts you at 23kg down. That is also flippin' brilliant, so don't do yourself down. Really! Another 23kg and I'd almost be at goal!

When I stop losing, it's generally because I've stopped writing my food down and/or planning my meals. Getting back on track with those two seems to help me.

I really hope you'll stick around

[CatchABreak]

Just wanted to say thanks to everyone for replying.
I know I have to take a step back and re-focus - it's just about doing exactly that and making the right choices.
I'll keep in touch with my progress...