[kelly315]

Hello fellow chicks! It's been a crazy 15 months, and 130 pounds later I find myself close to goal and inching forward. However, the numbers are no longer making me happy- in fact, they're making me miserable! I'm tired of living my life by the scale, allowing it to dictate how happy I will be that day. No more!

Also, I'm tired of eating the same thing day in and day out. I want the foods I love, and I want to teach myself to eat them in moderation and as part of a balanced lifestyle. I'm tired of going to the gym and caring more about how many calories I'm burning than what the exercise is doing for my mood and spirit. I say no more!

I'm getting rid of my scale, I'm saying no more "NO!" foods, no more exercise for the sake of weight loss alone. I'm not at goal yet, but the closer I get to goal, the more I realize that I need more than that number to make me happy! So here are my new goals:

Food
-Stop over thinking it, and stop obsessing about it. I'll probably continue to count calories for a while, until I get the hang of balancing my meals, but I'm trying to phase it out, so it's not the *key* to my lifestyle.
-Eat anything I want and learn to do so in moderation. Some foods, like ice cream and candy have too much power in my life. Having the option to eat them in moderation will help take away that power.
-Eat a variety! We all get in those diet ruts, where it's just easier to eat only certain foods. Food can be exciting and an adventure- why not try lots of things?
-Choose foods because I know they're healthy, not just because I know the calorie content. I want to view food as medicine, and choose what I eat accordingly. Carrots are disappointing when they're just a low-calorie alternative, but when they're healthy medicine, filled with vitamins and minerals to help me feel great, then wow! I want carrots!

Exercise
-Exercise isn't just about making my body look good. It also needs to be about making my body, mind, and spirit feel good. I want to try new physical activities, go at the rate which feels best for me. I'm tired of kicking my own butt in order to make it look smaller!
-Make it fun! I'm tired of looking down at a clock and telling myself "five more minutes." I want to do things I enjoy, I certainly don't want to waste my life doing things that only make me happy when they're over. No, a hike doesn't burn as many calories as a stair-stepper. No, tentatively trying new yoga poses doesn't make me lose a pound faster. But I'm going to enjoy them!
-Lose the fear of looking stupid. I want to climb a rock wall, and no one is going to laugh if I slip!
-Don't feel guilty. Sometimes we just don't want to work out. What's wrong with going for a walk instead? Or taking a day off? I don't have to feel bad for this.

Fat, Weight, etc
-This is going to sound terrible, but I'm going to do it- only weigh once every two weeks. The scale is gone, and I'm going to weigh myself at the gym every 2 weeks, on Monday. No joke. It's not going to be fun, and it will probably feel uncomfortable for the first week or two. I might fight it by getting grumpy or feeling fat. But I'm just going to deal, until I'm used to it.
-Measurements: only once a month, on the second weigh-in Monday of the month. Again, I'm just going to have to deal.

Mental
-Everything I've mentioned above, of course, is largely mental
-Coping with change is hard, and I recognize that this shift won't be easy. But it should be highly enjoyable once I get past the fear of change.
-Say 50 positive things about myself everyday. I'll have to keep a tally for a while, until I get used to it.
-Every time I notice myself thinking something negative, I'll think something positive directly after it, EVEN if I DON'T believe it. This is an old therapist's trick that I've noticed really works.
-Be mindful of my food, thoughts, feelings, and exercise without obsessing over them. I'm going to use a journal to help me with this. I need to be aware of my desire to be healthy and happy almost constantly so that I can overcome my usual habits and patterns. (This should get easier with time!)
-Come up with a new mantra every few days!

Todays mantra: Doesn't it feel good to be alive and healthy? Keep it that way!




So, I realize this is a lot, so sorry to go on for so long. I'd love it if some of you would join me! I want to start a discussion in which we can post our daily goals and successes, and just be there for each other. Please, if you're going to join, try to avoid talking about numbers constantly. That's not what this is about.
Anyone interested?

[k8t]

Kelly, I'm just starting...or I should say "restarting" ...my journey, but this is exactly where I am at.

[paris81]

Sounds like you have a good plan! A few weeks ago, I decided to focus more on my behavoir and less on the scale. I feel that if I have a day that is binge-free, it's a good day. Of course, I still get excited when the scale show progress, and upset when it doesn't, especially if I feel like I had a good week. . But I feel like it's better than focusing on numbers-which I can't completly control. I can only control what I do!

[BoobsNotBombs]

Wow! Awesome for you! Don't kill yourself by trying everything at once, but all of that sounds so awesome. Good luck.

[JulieJ08]

Sounds great to me!

[bonnnie]

While I am very supportive of your new lifestyle - gradually letting go of calorie counting and weighing in less often - don't forget the biological aspects of weight loss, Your body is going to fight you very very hard, it will want to be at your heavier weight.

I love your positive ideas, really --- simply don't forget about some of the hardcore scientific facts.

[Carly Smoker]

I totally believe in what you said. All of it. I am not quite to the point where I can apply it to my loss yet. But soon. Good luck, I will be checking on you and joining you soon.

[Mikayla]

When I first started I swore to my self that I would not obsess over food or exercise. When my mom lost 100 pounds she did become obsessed with her food exercise and the number on the scale. ( I know people hate to use the word obsessed but my mom really was) At her halfway point she began exercising 5 times a day, she ate the same thing everyday(even on Christmas) She wanted the scale to go lower and lower and ended up 117lbs (she's 5'4) Eventually she could not keep up the pace and maintained for years at around 130 My point is that she did not become healthy until she found balance.

So I decided that throughout my weightloss I would focus on finding balance. So I exercise 4-6 days a week, mostly walking,yoga and weights because that's what I like. And I eat many many of the same foods I always ate but in moderation(Like Chinese food, same dish WAY smaller portion) Now I have to admit as the scale goes lower the faster I wish the weight would go away, and then I tend to get in a mindset where i want to totally restrict my diet so I can get this weight off NOW, But then I take a step back, remember my mom and continue my plan as usual :-)

I have a number goal that I have in my head that I'm working towards in Feb(At my one year mark) But I wouldn't mind also focusing in the next few months on enjoying this process more and learning how to be happy with myself and the accomplishment of losing so much weight!

[Lori Bell]

Kelly, to be totally honest, this really scares me. To throw out the scale AND add back in "forbidden foods" at the same time seems kind of dangerous. I can see dumping the scale, or adding back in some of your favorites, but doing both seems kind of risky. You said you want to treat food as medicine but I can't help but think about how I used to use sugar as a drug addict would use narcotics, to numb me. I OD'd on my "meds" everyday. Just like a person addicted to pain pills, I was addicted to carbs. I couldn't stop at one. I hope that you can, because if you start fudging, and then not weighing very often, the weight will come back with a vengeance. Please be careful. You have come a long way, and I'd really hate to see you have to re-do. Maintenance is exactly like losing, just as difficult...it doesn't end. You can not just go back to winging it and hope the weight stays off.

[the slim me]

Kelly, I second what Lori Bell just said. I totally understand where you're coming from. I think we all get there. But i've found out the hard way that I can't just "stop" dieting. On the other hand, I love food and i do eat what I like. Good thing for me, I like everything! ha!!! I even allow myself a small treat every day. A small piece of candy or cookie every day with my tea. It keeps me focused. And you don't have to eat boring food. There are so many great recipes out there. So go crazy and experement with some new foods.

And exercise is exercise. A trip to the park with the kids, as long as you run and play, is exercise. A bike ride is exercise. You can have fun.

It does get tiresome at times. But it's so totally worth it!

[canadianwoman]

Originally Posted by kelly315

Some foods, like ice cream and candy have too much power in my life.

Your post is great but just to clarify, the above are not food. They are non-nutritional junk.

[time2lose]

Kelly,

You have been a big inspiration to me since I started here. I wish you the best with your new plan. We all have to figure out what works for us long term. As I have heard often here, we are all an experiment of one. Let us know how it works out!

[JayEll]

Hey Kelly!

Moderation is the key, whether it's with weighing, counting, or whatever. It could be that you have been taking an extreme view, and of course that can become very tiring and burdensome.

Moderation is the key. But some don't know what moderation is, because they haven't experienced it much. Don't forget to stay aware of what you are doing. Ice cream once a week is not moderation, for example. Ice cream once a month is closer.

I have tried the approach you've suggested, and although it may be OK for maintenance, it didn't work FOR ME with weight loss. Or I perhaps could say, it worked so slowly that things became very discouraging. I imagine that you'll expect a loss after two weeks of not weighing--so, be prepared if that doesn't happen. Be prepared to rethink things if you are stalled or if your weight goes up.

Moderation is the key. Did I say that already? You may find you still need to track what you eat because it's all too easy to space out and forget about that snack bar... that nibble of candy... that slice of pizza (it was just one!)... and then wonder what happened. It's also easy to let exercise slip. Suddenly instead of doing 40 minutes on the exercycle, you're doing 30, and then 20... I've been there!

So, hang in there, Kelly! Don't become obsessed, but don't become too loose, either.

Jay

[mayness]

I love the positive attitude! And I totally agree with eating a variety of foods, instead of just what's easy to count and easy to "fit in" to your day. I fall into those ruts myself sometimes.

Originally Posted by JayEll

I have tried the approach you've suggested, and although it may be OK for maintenance, it didn't work FOR ME with weight loss. Or I perhaps could say, it worked so slowly that things became very discouraging.

This is exactly my experience. I wanted SO BADLY to lose weight without the counting and obsessing, but FOR ME it just led to maintaining. Which is a good sign that I'll be able to relax some things once I am maintaining, and not have to track every single bite. But to lose weight, I have to be annoyingly diligent. But maybe you won't - and that's worth finding out, I think!

[sacha]

Everyone has different ways of doing things. Try it. If it works great, if it doesn't, try something else. I don't see the harm in TRYING.

I couldn't do it myself personally - but many can. Give it a go!