Does anyone else hate going to into certain stores to shop for other people because of the looks you get?? I have a younger sister (12) and I've started buying her clothes for birthdays and holidays, but when I go into A.E. or similiar stores, I feel like all the workers and the other shoppers are looking at me like, what is SHE doing in here? And wondering if I don't know I'm too big to be in there...
just wondering if anyone else felt that way or if it's just me!
I am sure the other shoppers and clerks have other things on their minds. I go shopping all the time and am not at all concerned why other people are there. If I thought about at all I would assume they are there to shop just as I am.
Giiiirrrrl.... I have felt that way so many times. Maybe some of it (or most of it?) is just us worrying about what other people are thinking, when they probably aren't even thinking anything at all.. even if they are, we shouldn't care (I know - saying that is way easier than actually not caring).
See, I keep telling myself that it's just me! I'm like, okay, surely no one really notices me in here, I'm just paranoid. I guess I just feel conspicuous!
I have TOTALLY felt that...a lot. I went out of town this weekend and my friend (who met us) wanted to go into all of these very high end stores...ultra expensive, where the biggest size is probably a 4. She is about 45 lbs. heavier than I and I think she was just curious about prices and sort of dreaming about what it would be like to be able to have the money AND the body to shop there. Anyway, the whole time, I think my face was burning red because I could feel all that judgment from the clerks who work there and I could feel them thinking we were too fat and too poor to be in their precious store! But now,looking back, I wish I had not been bothered by it because who are THEY to judge ME?
Anyway, I hate that feeling, but next time, when I go into a store (my favorite is BCBG), I will use that feeling and use it as motivation and inspiration to get to my goal. I know that if I stay OP, I will soon be able to walk into a store and fit into just about anything! I can't wait! You'll get there too.
Oh, one thing you might do if you wanna feel more comfortable is approach one of the sales people to see if they can help you find something for a gift. That way, the pressure will be off....but you certainly don't have to!
Another thing is, when I go into very high end stores, especially if I'm wearing sweats, I feel as though all of the clerks are STARING at me like I'm out of my mind. Then I tell myself that the clerks are there to work and serve customers. They probably don't make more than $8/hour, and while there's nothing wrong with that, it also does not give one the right to be snooty.
The truth is everyone is more concerned with themselves... I have a psychology degree and everyone assumes that everyone else is watching them but in reality they arent. We are all more concerned with ourselves... Most people dont notice what you're wearing or what you're doing you just simply think they notice and you think that you matter in their world more than you do... so go into stores and just do your thing... no one is judging you.... This is the same thing with the gym... a lot of people feel like they are constantly watched and judged at the gym but most people could care less who else is there
I so know the feeling. My best friend is a size four and she dragged me into a bunch of stores in the mall that I knew for a fact didn't carry my size.
A while later I thought back about it and realized that I was letting what people were POSSIBLY thinking of me keep me from doing things I wanted to do. When I came to that conclusion, I decided to stop letting people hold me back and most of all to stop ME from holding myself back.
I still feel that way! every time that I walk into a store I dread the moment when an sales person asks me if I need help/am looking for something. I absolutely hate it when people try to help me buy things and I feel like they are judging my size the WHOLE TIME. I think that they probably have other things on their mind honestly i think about that all the time.
No; it's true; what HaleyIsLove say is true; people are just looking out for their commission. I really prefer to shop and be left alone, so I always dress down.
Our mall is pretty dead right now, people seem to shop more for bargains, so I would think these high end stores should be happy to see anyone, but yes I have felt that way, but I do avoid stores anyway that are selling clothes to teenagers that won't flatter me anyway, such as AE
[QUOTE=HaleyisLove;3010468]The truth is everyone is more concerned with Most people dont notice what you're wearing or what you're doing you just simply think they notice and you think that you matter in their world more than you do... so go into stores and just do your thing... no one is judging you....
This is not always true. I tend to watch other people a lot, I don't know why, but I like to say I'm observant, also I was watched just recently, and if you read the horror story thread, people watch and say plenty, but I guess if you have a good self esteem you really shouldn't worry, I guess once you've been judged you think people are always judging you, my 84 yo mother works at a thrift store and she has told me stories how she thought, "nothing is going to fit you lady", and that's just a thrift store, there can also be some real snobbie salespeople working in those high end stores
I dislike Hollister for several reasons (i.e. smell the store a mile away and you can barely maneuver yourself much less a stroller through the store) but I digress... I shop Hollister for my older two and always think they must be thinking why is that old chunky lady in here?!
Scary Stores...Holiday Shopping UGH
