hi, this a little off topic, well it is and it isnt...
we have recently moved areas with my partners job, it isnt the easiest thing to do at the best of times, but being further away from family and friends even more so that i was before has taken its toll.
Im finding it increasingly harder to make friends, its not that im unsociable (although i do mostly prefer to stay in with the dog) its just that i have moved in to a very established area, where everyone already knows what eachother had for tea last night!plus my work doesnt really involve much social.

I had a go at the other half last night, ending up arguing for the sake of it!
I had just simply had enough as he has arranged a lads only night next week, whilst we have no real plans in between...

its hard to explain, I mean, ive had opportunities to go out and meet other people, but i feel that ive become so dependent on my hubbie for company ive kind of lost confidence in myself, not to mention the stone that ive put on in the last year and the fact that im growing my colour out of my hair..so in short im feeling alittle battered!!

the poor bloke, he had an ear full last night and i can totally understand that he needs some blokey time...im just feeling fed up i guess... !!

what do you do eh? i used to be so confident but then i was surrounded by friends that i had grew up with, there was no need to worry, since moving away (been bout 4 years now) its just slipped away...

all sorted now xx

[judipurple]

Touchmytoes, I can understand your frustration - and the need to talk to hubby - sorry it deteriorated into an argument. Have you considered perhaps taking an adult education class, just to learn something fun (and meet others with similar interests)? Or volunteer, join an exercise class, gardening club, get involved in a church or book study group (libraries offer those)? It takes a lot to break out of the cocoon we build around ourselves - it's comfortable and familiar, whilst trying new things are kinda scary. I just happened upon your thread, and hope others will join in with other ideas. Sometimes it takes a while for answers to trickle in.

[newleaf123]

I think it just takes time... I have felt that way where I live now. We moved here 4 years ago for my DH's job. He got all the social at work and since I knew 0 people, I was reliant on him for *my* social. I had left all my dear friends and family behind, and the sister-in-law that lives in our new city just didn't pan out as being the friend I thought she would be. So I have felt very alone and lonely. Slowly over the years, though, things have gotten better, mostly because I've gotten to know a lot of people through activities at my children's school. But it has been VERY slow, and even 4 years later I feel like, although I have tons of acquaintances, I really have very few friends - you know, the kinds of people that I would share my personal problems with. But, I just keep soldiering on.

Sorry you had a fight...

Re: the few responses - many people on the boards are in the US -- you posted at 2:00am my time, and then your 2nd post was at 9:00am my time.

thanks for the info..I have just looked into a class that is run just down the road, its only one night a week but it may do me good.
The last time i went to a fitness class i turned up thinking it was a beginners and we would all be inthe same boat and it wasnt they had changed it, so the people there had known eachother for a while..i felt quite silly bouncing around swearing under my breath at how unfit i was!!and despite my efforts met no friendly types there.

ah well..we ok now, just hard sometimes when we are just expected to jump right in with the social side of things here and its not that easy, most of the ladies around here have kids and so they do what they do, very few of the other girls go out either.

you feel a little silly sometimes though dont you when they are going out and yet again you offer to pick them up cus you arnt going to be going anywhere...and then they ask what have you been up to and your answer is the same...nothing really, just watched tv!! ha!! feeling really sorry for myself i guess, but like i said gonna start that class this week and get myself going again....good news is that ive just gone on scales (after promising i wouldnt) and ive dropped another half lb! probably water!!

xx