Weight Loss Support Give and get support here!

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 05-05-2009, 10:12 PM   #1  
Closed
Thread Starter
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,811

S/C/G: 244/165/137

Height: 5' 7"

Default Is Revenge a motivator for you?

Hi all!
OK, so I went to visit a friend of mine a few weeks ago (see my previous threads about this trip from ****). We hadn't seen each other for about 5 years. Since I've seen her, she's gained around 40 lbs. I've lost 40 lbs (she last saw me at 221 lbs). It was like we "flipped bodies". She kept saying how GREAT I looked, and she wasn't really saying it a nice way. It was more in a jealous way, because I've always been the heavy one in the relationship and now things are different.
Anyways, to make a long story short, it was a horrible trip. Before I left to visit her, she expressed to me about all the things we would do and how much fun we'd have, but when I GOT there, she turned really passive-aggressive. In all areas. And although she KNEW I was watching my diet, she and her DH decided to eat out twice a day at places with NO healthy options (Five Guys, anyone???) and would CHANGE the restaurant AFTER I'd look up the menus and make a healthy choice. It was like she was sabotaging me. Needless to say, it wasn't any fun. And I gained 3.5 lbs which thankfully I have since lost as I got RIGHT back on track when I got home.
But her actions got me MAD and MORE MOTIVATED than ever. I probably won't see her for another 5 years (she's only 1.5 hours away by air but has told me that she wouldn't "waste her money" coming up to see me but I could fly down to see HER again...), but when I DO see her, I WANT TO BE AT GOAL WEIGHT.
I really, REALLY want this. More than pretty much anything ELSE right now. I mean, I believe in the healthy lifestyle and am committed to it, but when I run out of mental steam, I JUST think to this and I AM MOTIVATED again.

Anyone else experience this? With respect to whom? And does this make me a bad, shallow, vindictive person ?

Kira

Last edited by kiramira; 05-05-2009 at 10:44 PM.
kiramira is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2009, 10:42 PM   #2  
sugar is the devil
 
SweetScrumptious's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Calgary, Alberta
Posts: 826

Default

Oh ya, when me and my ex of 2 years first broke up in August 2007 to be with another girl, I made it my PACT to become this skinny hot thing for when he sees me again. I started losing weight right away, but I started to get REALLY serious at the beginning of this year.

He moved to Calgary and is now engaged to that girl, but I don't think he'll be seeing me anytime soon (haven't seen him since we broke up).

But if one day, we cross paths, I still wanna be little Miss Hot Thang to rub it in his face!
SweetScrumptious is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2009, 10:44 PM   #3  
Becoming myself
 
sidhe's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Posts: 481

S/C/G: 294/233/180

Height: 5'9"

Default

Yes, I've experienced it. Am experiencing it right now, in many ways. And no, it doesn't make you a bad, shallow, vindictive person. It makes you human.
sidhe is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2009, 10:49 PM   #4  
nirvikalpa samadhi
 
DCHound's Avatar
 
Join Date: Dec 2008
Location: Gaithersburg, MD
Posts: 1,728

S/C/G: 369.5/ticker/169.5

Height: 5'8"

Default

After reading that, she's not your friend and I'm not sure why you would ever want to see her again.
DCHound is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2009, 10:54 PM   #5  
Member
 
SmilesIowa's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Iowa
Posts: 75

S/C/G: 300.1/*ticker*/269

Height: 5'6

Default

All I have to say is Amen! I am doing this for myself the most, but I have several people that I want to stick it to. I have a friend who basically said she hangs out with me because I'm not competition for her and she is pissed if anything good happens to me... I'mnot sure how long we'll be friends. Oh and the ex's, I can't wait for the day they see me thinner. Whenever I get down or need motivation, I think about what it would be like for one of them to see me and it gets me going again.

So if this makes you a shallow person, then we are there together! LOL

Last edited by SmilesIowa; 05-05-2009 at 10:56 PM.
SmilesIowa is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2009, 10:56 PM   #6  
Member
 
RachelOnADiet's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Louisiana
Posts: 53

S/C/G: 275/275/170

Height: 5'5"

Default

I agree with DCHound, this woman doesn't sound like a very good friend! I don't think I'd wanna see her. She does, however, provide great motivation
RachelOnADiet is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2009, 11:16 PM   #7  
Senior Member
 
Windchime's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Pacific Northwest
Posts: 2,088

Height: 5'11"

Default

Are you asking me if part of the reason I'm buckling down is to look like a million bucks at my class reunion this summer and make all the guys who didn't give me the time of day in high school a little bit sorry? Nooooooooooo!
Windchime is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-05-2009, 11:20 PM   #8  
Senior Member
 
ringmaster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,321

S/C/G: 198/155/140

Height: 5'9"

Default

ha, similar story here. Yeah, I want to look good in case I ever run into my ex again and so he can see what he missed out on. And also show off to anyone else who wasn't the nicest to me because I wasn't the "skinny" one.

Quote:
Originally Posted by SweetScrumptious View Post
Oh ya, when me and my ex of 2 years first broke up in August 2007 to be with another girl, I made it my PACT to become this skinny hot thing for when he sees me again. I started losing weight right away, but I started to get REALLY serious at the beginning of this year.

He moved to Calgary and is now engaged to that girl, but I don't think he'll be seeing me anytime soon (haven't seen him since we broke up).

But if one day, we cross paths, I still wanna be little Miss Hot Thang to rub it in his face!
ringmaster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-06-2009, 12:00 AM   #9  
Freedom in living
 
JuliaDH's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 1,704

S/C/G: ?/ticker/180

Height: 5'2"

Default

I try to use the "I WILL show you" 'tude to have a positive effect on my losses. Dont anyone dare tell me I cant do it! Actually its good when someone doubts me and says I cant. Its fuel to "Get 'er done!"

Last edited by JuliaDH; 05-06-2009 at 12:01 AM.
JuliaDH is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-06-2009, 06:09 AM   #10  
There is no spoon!
 
Delphi's Avatar
 
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Nashville, TN
Posts: 1,882

S/C/G: 265/ticker/160

Height: 5/9

Default

I'll mirror the words of others and say, that your "friend" doesn't sound like much of a friend at all. However, I definitely understand, especially after this trip, how hitting your goal and showing off your hard work would be quite satisfying.
Delphi is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-06-2009, 07:24 AM   #11  
rainy
Guest
 
Posts: n/a

Default

Yes, revenge is a great motivator for me.

My mother: the one that used to tell me all the time that I can't lose weight after getting 18 yrs old, just to show her she was wrong.
My father: the one that always teased me and also caused me the full range of eating disorders, that he failed everything about it.
My ex: that I'll be a slim ***** and sorry I'm not for him any any anymore!! :P
My ex-ex: that he missed a very good catch leaving me!
My ex-dietologist: that my diet worked much better than her and her fake assistance!! (I've already demonstrated this though)
  Reply With Quote
Old 05-06-2009, 07:34 AM   #12  
Baker's Daughter
 
MoonGirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Posts: 37

S/C/G: 179/142/136

Height: 5' 4"

Default

Gosh! Really felt for you when I read that!

My advice? Stick with the diet, sounds like you're doing brilliantly. However, ditch the friend. She sounds like a skanky little *****!!!!

xx
MoonGirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-06-2009, 08:02 AM   #13  
back to balance
 
Heffalump's Avatar
 
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Boston area
Posts: 384

Height: 5'7"

Default

As the saying goes: "Living well is the best revenge."
Heffalump is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-06-2009, 08:11 AM   #14  
XOXO
 
Devsmama's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: In my mind.....
Posts: 958

S/C/G: 268/249/145

Height: 5'4"

Default

Quote:
Originally Posted by RachelOnADiet View Post
I agree with DCHound, this woman doesn't sound like a very good friend! I don't think I'd wanna see her. She does, however, provide great motivation
couldn't have said it better!

That kind of motivation is good for the short term, but at the end of the day, that girl isn't your friend and thank God you don't have to see her again! Who needs frenemies like that?! Good riddance!!
Devsmama is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 05-06-2009, 08:44 AM   #15  
Crazy runner
 
Fat Pants's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Colorado
Posts: 1,063

S/C/G: 213/131/maintaining

Height: 5'4.5"

Default

Yup, I agree with the other ladies...this "friend" sucks! But I TOTALLY understand your motivation... like another poster, my 10-year high school reunion is next year and no way I'm showing up fatter than I was in high school (which was still fat, but not as fat as I am now!)
Fat Pants is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are Off
Pingbacks are Off
Refbacks are Off



All times are GMT -4. The time now is 04:34 PM.


We are a participant in the Amazon Services LLC Associates Program, an affiliate advertising program designed to provide a means for us to earn fees by linking to Amazon.com and affiliated sites.
Copyright © 2024 MH Sub I, LLC dba Internet Brands. All rights reserved. Use of this site indicates your consent to the Terms of Use.