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do you feel motivated or discouraged to lose weight when starting out?

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Old 04-18-2009, 05:15 AM   #1
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Default do you feel motivated or discouraged to lose weight when starting out?

Question: Do you feel motivated or discouraged to lose weight when you are FIRST starting to lose weight? Particularly if you have a LOT of weight to lose??

For me, I initially was motivated to lose weight after having my gallbladder removed due to gallstones as a result of morbid obesity. I didn't really think at first about losing 182 lbs, just that I HAD to start losing weight for obvious health reasons.

Later on, I thought of more motivational ideas to lose weight

You?

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Old 04-18-2009, 06:00 AM   #2
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The more I lose, the more motivated I get. I started out pretty gloomy at having let myself have to do it all again.
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Old 04-18-2009, 07:37 AM   #3
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All past (& failed) attempts at weight loss I felt a kind of a dread going into them. I didn't feel strong enough. Didn't feel as if I could really do it and never put forth much effort. It was kind of like "I'll give it a go, but who are we kidding here, this is not going to work".

Until this last time. The final time. There was no dread. There was nothing to be discouraged about. I was motivated beyond belief, but much more importantly - I was committed beyond belief. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I WAS going to get the weight off. It was kind of strange actually, but wonderful. I was extremely, extremely excited. I was extremely excited because I knew that an end to my misery was near. I saw right off the bat, what I knew deep down (very, very deep) to always be true - that if you stick with a healthy eating/exercise plan - the weight WILL come off. Which I suppose made me even more motivated, committed and DETERMINED.

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Old 04-18-2009, 08:52 AM   #4
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I think of all of the times I toyed with the idea of losing the weight. Each time, I thought about how long it would take, how old I was, how much weight I had to lose to get to even a "normal" weight - let alone a "goal" weight. I amassed so much negative energy, that I derailed each attempt right from the beginning.

This time was different, for many reasons.
1. I set a smaller, very realistic goal - get to "onederland". 15 lbs - I could DO this.
2. I saw this attempt as "now or never". At age 50, and post menopause - with my physical abilities rapidly deteriorating - I knew that if I didn't get my body back into a healthy place, that I would lose mobility and independence much sooner than I should. Hip and knee surgery was in my near future. So was diabetes.
3."Older & Wiser" attitude. I am a perfectionist. I love data, and goals. Thus, other attempts at losing weight were an ambitious plan with lots of goals and deadlines. That is how I function at work - very successfully. This time, the approach had to be a literal 180. No time constraints - plan the day, and get through it - minute by minute. My attitude was - it does not matter how slowly I do this - only that each and every day will be a day of positive progress toward my goal. No loss this week - no big deal. "progress not perfection" became my mantra.
4. Lifestyle change - "enjoy the journey" as my second focus. This HAD to be the last time I went through this process. I needed to make changes that I was willing to live with from now on.
5. Shift my mental focus to "me first is OK for now". I became selfish. Dinner and laundry became lower priorities than exercise and fitness, for example. My goals for the day were the highest priority. Balance of MY mind, body, spirit are WORTH giving time and attention to. Only when I am whole, can I truly serve others effectively.

So - that was a very long way of saying - this time, it I was very encouraged and excited to change myself from the inside out. To devote time and energy to improving my quality of life so that I could really enjoy time with those I love.

It has been a joyous journey - from the very first day.
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Old 04-18-2009, 08:58 AM   #5
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I'm a little more like Robin but I'm a horrible procrastinator. I've decided about ten times since last fall

I actually stuck to plan for a few days in a row in February and those couple of pounds lost were the kick it took to get me going. Now, I'm encouraged by the losses, excited to be heading in the right direction.

If I could figure out what clicked in February, I'd be rich!
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:09 AM   #6
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Quote:
Originally Posted by rockinrobin View Post
All past (& failed) attempts at weight loss I felt a kind of a dread going into them. I didn't feel strong enough. Didn't feel as if I could really do it and never put forth much effort. It was kind of like "I'll give it a go, but who are we kidding here, this is not going to work".

Until this last time. The final time. There was no dread. There was nothing to be discouraged about. I was motivated beyond belief, but much more importantly - I was committed beyond belief. I knew beyond a shadow of a doubt that I WAS going to get the weight off. It was kind of strange actually, but wonderful. I was extremely, extremely excited. I was extremely excited because I knew that an end to my misery was near. I saw right off the bat, what I knew deep down (very, very deep) to always be true - that if you stick with a healthy eating/exercise plan - the weight WILL come off. Which I suppose made me even more motivated, committed and DETERMINED.
Ditto.

I was highly motivated. I never looked back, I knew I could do it, and I decided I WAS going to do it. No excuses. NO EXCUSES! NO EXCUSES!

(Can you tell I don't like excuses!)
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:31 AM   #7
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Yeah what Robin said

This time I was committed to doing what needed to be done. I can't tell you why I felt this resolve when I didn't feel it the other times but it was there & still is!
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:36 AM   #8
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Well, I'm still quite a way from my *goal* but I have no doubt that this is the time I'll get there. Why? Because I'm still doing what I need to do everyday. Slow and steady wins the race.

I'm not feeling that panicked 'I have to get all this weight off in _______ *insert ridiculous goal here*. That feeling and the frenzy that follows it has always signaled disaster in the past for me and probably most other dieters.

This time I took an inventory of where it's all gone wrong before and, for me, the biggest problem was perfectionism. That belief that anything less than a perfect effort was not enough has derailed me many a time. I am ADD which means I can be implusive and I get bored with boring details like calorie counting. My personality type is the LEAST likely to be able to lose weight let alone maintain it.

Yet here I am, slowly steadily losing and still dedicated to what I'm doing 6 months into it. Why? Because I took the pressure out of it. I decided to accept small, incremental change and that ANY loss was 'good enough'. I still eat something sweet on a near daily basis. I eat just enough to enjoy it then quit. I exercise but I set the 'minimum' bar low (3 times per week for 35 minutes). I almost always exceed the minimum and usually by double. Do you know how much more enjoyable it is to push yourself those extra minutes when you know they are above and beyond your goal rather than speaking harshly to myself trying to force me over a bar that I set so high that I'm always in the mode of perfection or disappointment. I'm going to get to my goal by accepting 'good enough'.

I realize I haven't lost a lot of weight yet by most standards but it's the most I personally have ever lost. I've never lasted long enough in any 'diet' to get this far before. It hasn't really even been that hard to get here. For the first time I've honestly changed my habits not just put them on hold for a few weeks/months. It's been relatively EASY to do it too. I don't NEED a ton of motivation to keep me going (although I have it) because I have commitment and this slow progression over time has changed me a bit at a time.

My personal life philosophy is that we'll get closer to perfection by just trying to be a little bit better than we ever will by trying to be perfect. Now that I am learning to shut up my perfectionist, I'm doing great!
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:54 AM   #9
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Not only did I have a sense of dread and the feeling that I couldn't really do it, in previous and failed attempts - but I always had the sense of - but how can I do with out "all that food" and for so long. How can I live without THOSE foods?

It took me many years of misery and half-hearted attempts to realize - How could I go possibly go on living my life with THOSE foods? That was a biggie. The realization and acceptance that I simply had to give up THOSE foods. This wasn't a negative thing (eventually), it was a positive thing. I was thrilled to WANT to give them up. Because I knew it was the only way.

Quote:
I never looked back, I knew I could do it, and I decided I WAS going to do it. No excuses. NO EXCUSES! NO EXCUSES!

(Can you tell I don't like excuses!)
Lori Bell, I HATE excuses too. Lord knows I had tons of them for many years. Now - brutal honesty. No hiding behind excuses. This has spread into other areas of my life as well. You give me an excuse - I'll knock it down. Because there ARE no excuses. Not to say that some people don't have different and harder circumstances - but there is ALWAYS a way around it. ALWAYS! If you want it badly enough - you'll FIND a way - if not you'll find an excuse.

Quote:
I saw this attempt as "now or never". At age 50, and post menopause - with my physical abilities rapidly deteriorating - I knew that if I didn't get my body back into a healthy place, that I would lose mobility and independence much sooner than I should. Hip and knee surgery was in my near future. So was diabetes.
So did I - now or never - life or death. I was going down hill and fast. I simply could not go on the way that I was. It was DO or DIE.

Quote:
4. Lifestyle change - "enjoy the journey" as my second focus. This HAD to be the last time I went through this process. I needed to make changes that I was willing to live with from now on.
5. Shift my mental focus to "me first is OK for now". I became selfish. Dinner and laundry became lower priorities than exercise and fitness, for example. My goals for the day were the highest priority. Balance of MY mind, body, spirit are WORTH giving time and attention to. Only when I am whole, can I truly serve others effectively.
This was the case with me as well.

Quote:
I was very encouraged and excited to change myself from the inside out. To devote time and energy to improving my quality of life so that I could really enjoy time with those I love.

It has been a joyous journey - from the very first day.
Ditto on this one too. Exactly.
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Old 04-18-2009, 09:55 AM   #10
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Bindersbee's note put a thought in my head. Let's see if I can get it straight in writing.

We need to free ourselves of "comparison" pressure.

I'll bet I spent the better part of 6 months acutely aware that my friends, family and coworkers would know that I'd regained my weight. I compared myself to the good example I had been. I compared myself to everyone else who'd ever lost and regained. I compared this time with last time and the time before that ...

At least part of the kick-start-restart I had in February was realising that this is a fresh start. What my friends, family and coworkers think matters very little to what I eat and how I spend my time. Nobody really pays that much attention so why do I worry about being any kind of example. The fact that I've done it before simply means I can do it again. Previous attempts only affect my progress if I allow them to.

This time is independent of any other time in my life. I will never be this age on this day, in this family situation, in this work situation etc ever again.
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Old 04-18-2009, 10:18 AM   #11
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I didn't know anyone in real life who had lost a significant amount of weight and kept it off. It was only here, at 3FC, where I read and saw success stories. So for me, I thought, "it is POSSIBLE", it could be done, other people were doing it, I can do it too.

So I was very optimistic heading into this last effort and I've maintained a 50 lb weight loss for 8 months now. Wow....hadn't realized it had been that long! I would have thought significant weight loss and maintenance was impossible save for 3FC, primarily Meg and the other maintainers and weight lifters.

All of the pieces fell into place--I knew what DIDN'T work and I knew what DID and I looked at the mechanics of successful losers' days. The accountability threads are like gold here.

Yeah, 99% of losers gain the weight back, but I know that I control if I am in the 1% that keeps it off or the 99% who gain it back. The knowledge that I control my weight destiny is huge and I learned it here. So, no, not discouraged, but I don't really care for "motivated" either, rather excited and confident.
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Old 04-18-2009, 10:37 AM   #12
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well i've done this before 11 years ago i managed to lose 60+lbs and kept it off for 8 years, it took 3 years for 60lbs to creep back on, now i'm as motivated as i was back then, i'm just going for it... having a support forum helps tremendously.... but realizing i dont want to get old carrying all this excess weight around helps too.... good luck to everyone trying to lose weight here....
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Old 04-18-2009, 01:02 PM   #13
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I felt motivated when I started. Discouraged is how I felt every day I didn't start.
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Old 04-18-2009, 01:22 PM   #14
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I felt very motivated when I started, but then, I had felt that way in 2 previous attempts ... both started in the fall (06 and 07), both with 2-3 months/25 lbs or less lost before I stopped 'feeling' the motivation.

The motivation can fade and no longer look as enticing or as attainable as the large iced coffee with muffin. That's why, while I still enjoy motivation, it's not why I keep going. Rockinrobin really nails this very point so often in previous posts I've read here.
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Old 04-19-2009, 09:22 AM   #15
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Quote:
Originally Posted by midwife View Post
I didn't know anyone in real life who had lost a significant amount of weight and kept it off. It was only here, at 3FC, where I read and saw success stories. So for me, I thought, "it is POSSIBLE", it could be done, other people were doing it, I can do it too. Snip...
YES! Good point. I remember when I first started 3FC there was a discussion going on about some study that said only 2% of people who lost weight maintained it. Those are pretty cruddy odds, but I decided I wanted to be a member of that highly elite group . Matter of fact I think those 2% are all members of 3fc! We are so lucky to have them as our cheerleaders. I guess that is one of the things that have kept me losing, because I want to prove to the world (or at least to myself) that it is possible to maintain this weight loss. I'm actually really looking forward to doing it!

Last edited by Lori Bell : 04-19-2009 at 09:27 AM.
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