3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community  

Go Back   3 Fat Chicks on a Diet Weight Loss Community > Support Forum > Weight Loss Support

Weight Loss Support Give and get support here!

Is it okay to not care occasionally or is that like self-sabatoge?

Reply
 
Thread Tools
Old 04-02-2009, 02:45 PM   #1
Senior Member
 
cammieb's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2009
Location: Oceanside, CA
Posts: 151

S/C/G: 217/196/135

Height: 5'7"

Default Is it okay to not care occasionally or is that like self-sabatoge?

My mom had an award dinner last night for being a top producer for her work (She's a travel agent). Well, I was invited to go and we went to this very nice very expensive restaurant. They brought out appetizer samplers and at first I was going to not try an appetizer and only have an entree and no dessert, but then I thought forget it. I will probably never get to come here again (my meal itself with appetizers and desert was probably 150 dollars) and get this food so I might as well enjoy it. I tried 1 of each appetizer (there were 3), had my entree, and me and my mom each got a desert and shared so we could try different ones. I did not attempt to count the calories or anything. I know I probably ate thousands of calories, but I feel like that was a once in a lifetime experience and I would have felt wretched all night if I didn't get to enjoy myself. I'm back on track today and have planned a little more exercise for the week and better eating, as in healthier eating, no prepackaged stuff. Is this okay to do every great while or can this lead to self-sabotage?
__________________
cammieb is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 02:50 PM   #2
No description available.
 
midwife's Avatar
 
Join Date: Aug 2004
Location: Bat Country
Posts: 7,346

Default

life happens. It includes meals out, birthdays, weddings, holidays, etc. Being healthy doesn't mean being perfect or denying ourselves decadence forever. It means balancing all aspects of our lives. The choices we make most of the time shape our health. An occasional dinner does not undo that. Get back to your plan. I hope you enjoyed the evening!
__________________
"And that's how Beowulf rolls"~ my DD
midwife is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 02:51 PM   #3
Senior Member
 
CollegeGirl's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 260

S/C/G: 204/*ticker*/140

Height: 5'9

Default

I feel like you did the best that you could in that situation. I dont think that it is very practical to think that we will be able to count our calories for the every meal for the rest of our lives, yes we should be carefull what we eat and count when we can but this was a special occasion. Also its not like you went to overboard, you only had one of each appetizer I probably would have eaten the whole tray! ahahaha
__________________
mini goal 1: 160 achieved:6/27/09 mini goal 2: 150 achieved: 12/28/09 ultimate goal:140 achieved:

Last edited by CollegeGirl : 04-02-2009 at 02:51 PM.
CollegeGirl is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 02:52 PM   #4
Junior Member
 
Join Date: Apr 2009
Location: Bahrain
Posts: 6

S/C/G: 173/165/140

Height: 5ft 5"

Default

I think the key is the word you used in your question - OCCASIONALLY.

IMHO as long as you don't use one over-indulgence as an excuse to go totally off the rails, then the occasional "treat" can sometimes be what keeps us going. No-one enjoys self-deprivation - especially in a case like this where you may not have another opportunity to visit this restaurant.

I'm glad you had a great evening and shared a special occasion with your mum, and you have a healthy attitude towards making up for it by increasing your efforts in the following days.

I'm finding it a trial shopping at the moment with all the easter goodies in the shops, but I've promised myself a treat when my little one gets her eggs on easter Sunday, so I don't feel so deprived
JulieBahrain is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 02:53 PM   #5
Senior Member
 
Join Date: Aug 2006
Location: Waterloo, Ontario
Posts: 597

S/C/G: 157/133.4/130

Height: 5'5"

Default

Cammie, first of all, you did not eat "thousands" of calories! No way. It sounds like you were completely sensible, and ate a very normal meal, even if it did put you over a bit on your calorie-reduced plan. It also sounds like you are being very good in getting right back on track after this meal. If you're capable (and it sounds like you are!) of planning to have a special-occasion meal every once in a while & get right back on track afterwards, that is absolutely okay! When you get into self-sabotaging is when you start to see every weekend as a "special occasion."
__________________
Su-Bee is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 03:02 PM   #6
Senior Member
 
Jacqui_D's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2006
Location: Ohio, USA
Posts: 2,903

S/C/G: 211/168/145

Height: 5'8"

Default

I think incorporating real life situations occasionally into your healthy eating style will help you to succeed in the long run. Just don't make a habit of it. Keep it a rare occurrence, don't have a defeatist attitude and binge, don't beat yourself up about it, but just go back to eating as you know you should, which you did! I think you handled it very well!
__________________
Current Attempt (Slow Carb Diet, started July 19, 2013) <> Previous Attempt (Calorie-Counting, 2009)

= 10 lbs lost; = 5 lbs lost:
MINI GOALS:
1. 196 lbs = "Overweight" BMI of 29.8 MET GOAL!!
2. 178 lbs = Lowest Weight in 13 years, BMI of 27.1 MET GOAL!!
3. 164 lbs = "Normal Weight" BMI of 24.9
4. 145 lbs = Goal Weight BMI of 22.0
MAINTENANCE GOAL:
Stay between 145 lbs and 155 lbs
Jacqui_D is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 03:11 PM   #7
Ija
Extra gluten
 
Join Date: Nov 2005
Location: New England
Posts: 858

S/C/G: 286/135/135

Default

Cammie, as long as you go back to your normal routine afterward, there is no reason to worry about one dinner, especially if you stuck to reasonable sized portions. Remember that your body cares most about your overall pattern of eating and activity, not mere isolated incidents.

The occasional indulgence is actually part of my plan, and I allow myself to enjoy special outings like that with the understanding that it doesn't give me a license to continue eating that way after the event is over. When I go to a nice restaurant, I get what I want (including drinks and dessert) without worrying about the calories, though I make sure not to eat and drink to excess. It took me a long time to learn to stick to reasonable portion sizes with treat foods, but I've found it to be an incredibly important skill!

Don't worry too much about the dinner, just keep on keepin' on

Last edited by Ija : 04-02-2009 at 03:13 PM.
Ija is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 03:16 PM   #8
Senior Member
 
kaplods's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jul 2003
Location: Wausau, WI
Posts: 13,326

S/C/G: SW:394/310/180

Height: 5'6"

Default

I really think that one of the biggest enemies of permanent weight loss is the perfection myth. The idea that the weight loss plan should be done perfectly or not at all (Even though most of us know on a conscious level that this isn't true, we still may feel guilt and a nagging suspicion that it is when we deviate, even slightly from our plan).

I've fallen off so many diets because I thought that even the smallest of deviations from my plan was not only a mistake, but an indication that I couldn't succeed. I KNEW it wasn't true, but I still felt like a failure over even smallest deviations from plan. I had to learn to re-interpret those feelings. It's hard, because our culture tells us that if we're "dieting," we're supposed to feel guilty (sometimes REALLY guilty) if we aren't perfect in executing our plans.
__________________
My Etsy shop (currently closed for the summer)

http://www.dreamstormdesigns.etsy.com
etsy link by permission from 3fc! Want to add yours? Ask them!
kaplods is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 03:21 PM   #9
Let's salsa!
 
Tomato's Avatar
 
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Ontario, Canada
Posts: 2,396

S/C/G: 208/160/158 for now

Height: 5'9"

Default

Did you enjoy the dinner? I think you did. Great. I am glad you had a chance to sample such good food. Throw your guilt out the window. You don't want to live your life eating only carefully portioned cottage cheese and oatmeal.
__________________
****************
Dearest Schumeany: Yes, those are size 4 jeans hugging my posterior. Thank you for being such motivation!!!
Tomato is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 03:25 PM   #10
Maintainer since 7-3-2009
 
Lori Bell's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jun 2008
Location: A Nebraska Farm
Posts: 3,087

S/C/G: 333/160/145

Height: 5'6"

Default

I've eaten at a few high end restaurants before and they are not like some of the local dives I used to favor. The food isn't fried and piled high and dripping in grease. The ones I have been to I was actually quite disappointed how "small" a $70 entree was. At one place I was served a tiny strip of veal (probably 3 oz) 4 asparagus spears, some kind of baby pearl potatoes (a few oz max) and a few sprigs of greens with some limey juice squirted on. I figured my entree was about 15 cents a calorie...vs the local dive at 15 cents per 500 calories...lol Life is a wonderful ride. You have to take time to enjoy the finer things in life, just make sure when you do, it needs to be WELL worth it, and only on truly special occasions! You did good, don't feel defeated.
Lori Bell is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 03:27 PM   #11
Sandy....
 
mygritsconfessions's Avatar
 
Join Date: Jan 2009
Location: Florida
Posts: 789

S/C/G: 270/207.8/155

Height: 5'5

Default

I agree with jacqui - you have to live your life - remember it's not prison, it's a complete lifestyle change and food is part of life.
__________________
Blessings,

Sandy



"When your belief in you and your dream, is greater than your belief in other people's opinions, you will have mastered your life."



Last edited by mygritsconfessions : 04-02-2009 at 03:27 PM.
mygritsconfessions is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 03:30 PM   #12
Senior Member
 
Smiling_Sara's Avatar
 
Join Date: Oct 2007
Location: Wisconsin
Posts: 2,106

S/C/G: 278/see ticker/150

Height: 5'4

Default

i think it's ok "once in a great while" the next few days eat real clean an well, excersize a little more, and you will have those calories worked off in a jiffy. Sounds like you had a great time!
Smiling_Sara is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 04:21 PM   #13
3 + years maintaining
 
rockinrobin's Avatar
 
Join Date: Sep 2006
Posts: 12,070

S/C/G: 287/120's

Height: 5 foot nuthin'

Default

Sounds to me like you picked the perfect opportunity to indulge in a splurge.

I mean, it wasn't like it was some greasy all you can eat buffet. But a fine and elegant restaurant in which your mom was being honored. Opportunities like that don't come around very often.
rockinrobin is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 04:33 PM   #14
Senior Member
 
ringmaster's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 1,326

S/C/G: 198/155/140

Height: 5'9"

Default

Sounds like you handled it well, and I agree it doesn't sound like 1000s of calories. Since it was once in a blue moon opportunity, no big deal.

I think it's good to discuss when should we splurge and when should we hold back. Since doing it too often is not a good idea. Do we splurge on holidays, when we are eating as a guest at someone else's home? When is it being rude not eating everything given to us?
ringmaster is offline   Reply With Quote
Old 04-02-2009, 04:39 PM   #15
Senior Member
 
MindiV's Avatar
 
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: North Texas
Posts: 2,216

S/C/G: 220 (2007) 159 (now)/159/140

Height: 5 feet, 8.5 inches tall

Default

It just depends on you, and how you handle it. Some people can go totally wild every so often and get right back on plan the next day, and continue for months without deviating. Others fall entirely off the wagon...the whole "I screwed up...I'll try again another time" mentality.

I'm not sure what side I fall on, so I just stick to the plan.
__________________







MindiV is offline   Reply With Quote
Reply
Posts by members, moderators and admins are not considered medical advice
and no guarantee is made against accuracy.


Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

vB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off
Trackbacks are On
Pingbacks are On
Refbacks are Off


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 03:09 PM.






Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.6.7
Copyright ©2000 - 2015, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Search Engine Optimization by vBSEO 3.3.2