[teawithsunshine]

I have to go to a birthday event next week, and I found myself freaking out in advance thinking "OMG, what the heck can I eat there?????!"

Then later on, the answer hit my like a 2 by 4-- giving myself the excuse (a birthday party) to potentially splurge and/or binge was NOT the way to go. I have to remember my eating lifestyle (it's very close to the Mediterranean diet, minus the high fat dairy products, etc) at home needs to be the same as when I go out.

And then I began to relax a bit. Sure, I'll still have to check with the waiter to see that my fish/poultry/game meat is grilled/baked/or poached (I don't eat red meat since they tend to be higher in fat than I can handle). I'll also have to ask the waiter to put the salad dressing on the side (so I can skip it completely depending on what it is).

But the key was simply realizing: "hey, what you eat at home, you have to apply it to outdoor events!"

A lot of people have encouraged me in the past when I was trying to lose weight and say "oh, it's okay-- one piece of [write fatting food item here] won't hurt."

Umm.... YEAH .... IT .... DOES! Because that just gives me the excuse to go crazy and plow into junk food long after I'm finished socializing with my friends/family members for the evening.

Other people would just look at me like I'm seriously depriving myself at the table when I order the foods I eat now.

It took awhile for me to get to the fact that yes, while food can be delicious -- in it's most natural or organic form (i.e. veggies, fruit, nuts, olives, poultry, fish and yes-- even dark bitter chocolate), it's meant to be fuel and not like a pack of twinkies off the shelf from a gas station.

How the heck did I get this far in my weight-loss progress before realizing this? LOL

~ tea

PS: I later googled about this subject and came across a great short article. Just type in Irene Rubaum-Keller I Eat Everything I Want and I'm Thin

[Lori Bell]

I would wish you good luck at the party, but I don't think you'll need it. When a person is highly motivated to lose weight, you could sit them in the middle of the worlds famous Tippin's Bakery and they will stay on plan. It's when you are tittering on the edge when the problems begin...With a good core knowledge of nutrition, (which I wish more parents would teach their children), better choices are pretty easy to make.

You know it floors me when I see shows like the Biggest Loser and other "diet" shows and people have no idea that a smothered burrito has more fat/calories/sodium etc, than a 6 oz steak and plain baked potato. It's like, "didn't your mama tell you that???" I feel sorry for them.

[maryblu]

Nice 'shrooms, Lori Bell! Aren't Morels just the best?

Thanksfor the article find, tea.

[saef]

Lori, I wish my mother knew about stuff like that. Really. She has only the faintest idea of what's involved in nutrition, such as that you probably have to have a vegetable with dinner a few times a week.

She looks at me making up a perfectly enormous salad at lunchtime and says, "That's a lot to eat. Don't you think that's a lot? You know, if you ate less, you wouldn't have to exercise so much." Then she eats just a bit of cottage cheese with fruit, and a half hour later, has an enormous bowl of ice cream. And she thinks she's eating less than I am. She doesn't have any understanding of some of the concepts behind volumetrics.

No, I had to start reading diet & nutrition books to teach myself about what to eat. I think I may have started with magazine articles. I don't remember now. The information is all over the place, but you have to pay attention to it. My mother clearly hasn't.

Speaking to the OP: I think that going out to dinner isn't a fuel stop or an indulgence in pleasure so much as a social occasion. It's a chance for me to talk with & be physically near people whom I enjoy being with. It helps me if I keep these priorities straight. Like: Am I here to eat ____, or do I really want to find out what's going on in M's or J's lives, because one just moved into a new condo, the other has a boyfriend who's looking serious, etc.? When I start focusing on what I really need from the evening, which is some human contact after being with my laptop all day, it helps me.

My friends are actually quite helpful. They would never pick a restaurant where I would feel uncomfortable or be unable to order anything on the menu. For years, I've been the unhealthiest person in the group, while they were out going through raw food phases, no wheat phases, low carb phases, discovering yoga, hiking, skiing, taking up modern dance, wall-climbing, getting certified as personal trainers. So they're welcoming me to parts of their lives that I never participated in. It's a good feeling.