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Where do you find support?

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Old 02-22-2009, 08:56 PM   #1
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Default Where do you find support?

Oh, I've been on every diet. Really. And I KNOW I need to start eating healthy again and exercising. I've lost a lot of weight and regained it. I know. My husband is supportive but won't change his eating. He also has a heart problem and can't do much besides walking at a slow pace. He's very sedentary and loves tv and movies and sleeping. I feel like I'm getting sucked down. I love to be outside and love to lift weights and walk and DO
things. I work, I go to school, I have 3 kids that are into sports and ccd, etc. I feel like if I had a friend who wanted to join me and time to do it, I'd have more success. How do you all overcome this stuff. I can't be the only one. Oh, and I do eat when I'm happy , mad, glad, sad ,etc. This stress about DH heart condition is on the front burner right now and I'd like to not eat to feel better. Also, when I have a day that I decide to start, I get a migraine headache before noon!!!
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Old 02-22-2009, 09:01 PM   #2
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This is really the best place for me to get support. I don't know anyone else who's dieting, and I'm kind of on my own. My boyfriend is really sweet about the comments he makes, but he's not dieting either.
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Old 02-22-2009, 09:23 PM   #3
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I get my support from my boyfriend and this site. But I do everything alone. When I first joined, I, too, was feeling like it was impossible due to my boyfriend, who eats what he wants and doesn't exercise. Like, how can I be in the same room with him and exercise while he doesn't?

I think eventually you find that motivation. Checking in here frequently helps too. There's a lot of us whose partners are not on the same page as us.

Also, I try to get in activity that's not exactly exercise... like walking to work or from it, taking the stairs to our apartment (23 flights), choosing active dates like bowling. And find exercises you don't mind doing by yourself. I have a Wii and do Dance Dance Revolution. My bf also likes to play Wii tennis with me so we'll play like 20 games a night. You can do sit-ups, push-ups, leg lifts, squats, lunges, etc., during commercials on TV.

At this point, my bf sees me losing weight and knows my goal and wants me to reach it so he will go on walks with me or he will even suggest we eat healthier foods when I'm craving junk. He was way more helpful and participatory when he saw I was actually committed to it and not just talking about it.
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Old 02-22-2009, 09:28 PM   #4
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I found a great book at the library called Lean Mom, Fit Family... you might go read it, all sorts of ideas plus recipes for a mom to stay in shape and plan meals - husbands eat more then us, so it has portion sizes for moms, kids and husbands.

If you are eating emotionally then you'll have to get a grip on that... learn relaxation techniques, take care of yourself (including eating right/exercising) so you can take care of others. Frazzled mom's can't.
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Old 02-22-2009, 09:31 PM   #5
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Red face Good question...

This is difficult for me too....

Previously I joined weight watcher's with my sister and we were weight loss buds. I have moved about an hour away from her and we can't do it togehter anymore due busy schedules and drive times.... I miss having a buddy sooo much. I keep hoping i might meet someone at my meeting, but I havent really talked to anyone yet at my new meeting.

I have support from my DBF. We work out together at the gym though he doesn't push which is what I need. If I am pushed I tend to rebel. Also he doesn't eat any junk in front of me and doesn't bring it in the house. He is super supportive but also wants me to know he loves me no matter what my size which is important for me.

I also really like this site. I recently started blogging about my weight lose which I enjoy- it is journaling online for me... I don't have many readers yet, but I keep reading others and hoping to get some followers.

If you come up with other ideas for support around you let me know becuase I think it would help me too!

Perhaps and email pen pal for weight loss? I would be interested in corresponding with you daily...??
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Old 02-22-2009, 11:23 PM   #6
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Right now .. Only this place and all you wonderful people! mostly everyone else thinks i should stop losing weight.
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Old 02-22-2009, 11:35 PM   #7
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You know what I did? I happened to have some very scary health scares during the middle of the night a few times and he knew how much it meant to me to lose this. And he could tell there was a difference as I gained weight this year. He knew that it meant a lot to me. I overhauled everything and I talked to him about it beforehand. If he didn't eat something I ate, he'd have to fend for himself and he knew from the beginning. I will give him slightly bigger portions but I don't want to force him on this diet of mine. But all my slightly bigger portions for him are still stock full of veggies and healthy stuff. I'll ask him what he would like and if I can fit it in my plan, I'll do it. I basically forced him into this. He is quite fine with it. The other day we had Kashi pizza and he said, "I don't like it but it's good for you, so I will eat it." It means a lot to me that he does that. I still verbalize to him that I worry about him but I think over the spring, he may try to walk more. He realizes that his health is worse and that is a good thing. Just like smoking, you can't force people to change their eating habits.

Also, are you eating enough if you are getting headaches? Are you addicted to caffeine perhaps? What does your plan entail?

I usually try to do something else when I feel emotional or if I feel like eating when emotional, I make plans for it in my points. Try doing something else, like exercise, clean, read, do something and totally engage yourself in it.

Do what you need to do to feel good. Offer to let him come stroll with you. Not for fitness but to spend time with each other. Even walking around the block once or twice will help him and even the extra steps may help a bit for you.
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Old 02-23-2009, 12:08 AM   #8
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Honestly on here! I am all over the place meeting wonderful, supportive and many times funny folks! I have subscribed to 4 threads on here, but inbetween I am all over.
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Old 02-23-2009, 12:19 AM   #9
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Here and another forum that isn't dedicated to weight but has a weight loss thread. My husband honestly isn't very supportive when it comes to my weight loss. One time I complained that I always get salads when we go out while he gets whatever he wants. He said he was going to start eating healthier when we eat out but that has not happened. He also does not exercise even though he said that he would start using the elliptical regularly. He eats what he wants, doesn't really exercise but doesn't gain a pound. Although I think he is slowly becoming aware since he says things like "I tried not to eat junk at work today" or "I was glad I walked to work today". So it's something.

I realized I have to find the motivation in myself and not wait for "support" at least not from people in your life. That why sites like this are a Godsend.
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Old 02-23-2009, 12:28 AM   #10
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I get most of my support from here, and I don't even post that much! I do a lot of reading here and find lots of inspiration. I also have a co-worker who has lost a significant amount of weight, so he has been very informative and supportive. I don't have a BF or a DH, so I'm kind of going it alone right now. I'm kind of silly in that I don't really like to talk to people in "real life" about my weight loss journey because it makes me feel put on the spot. I really do a lot better when I'm just quietly focusing on my own and hanging out here!
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Old 02-23-2009, 06:54 AM   #11
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Wow. Thanks for all your honesty. It seems as if I am not the only one. I guess, in my ideal fantasy, I would have a neighbor or friend or sister to walk with daily or lift weights with. I think the rest would be easier if I had that. I used to. I know, I have to do it myself. I also know that when the weather around here (New England) gets better, I can take my kids walking with me while they scooter and walk the dog. I even own a treadmill and weight bench and mini trampoline. I have no excuses, I know. And my DH does most of the cooking an he's willing to cook healthy for me. He also shops and will buy whatever I need. As for the headaches...they're chronic for me and get worse when I try to cut out wheat. The only time I ever stopped getting headaches is for 2 years when I didn't eat wheat, gluten, yeast, flour, sugar or salt. But I don't want to be that strict this time around. Clearly, I couldn't do it forever. Thank you all for your words. I will try to dig deep.
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Old 02-23-2009, 08:42 AM   #12
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I find this site to be a HUGE source of inspiration and motivation. I also have a co-worker who lost a significant amount of weight a couple of years ago. She has been great to talk to because she truly knows what challenges I am facing.
Hang in there! You CAN do this!
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Old 02-23-2009, 09:28 AM   #13
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My main source of support is here....but my whole family also supports me too so I'm lucky in this aspect. The only thing is when I'm having a problem they have no idea on what I'm talking about lol
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Old 02-23-2009, 09:29 AM   #14
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I am very fortunate in the support department. My friends and family are not supportive and they are ALWAYS pushing food on me or asking me to go and eat out BUT...

I get a lot of inspiration and support from here of couse but I also have a Weight Watcher's Buddy and weight losing partner in my friend's Mom! Yes i said it right! LOL! My friend's Mom!

We joined Weight Watcher's together and and really enjoy our group which is a rather large and LOUD group (30+ members)

A very unlikely team we are but my friend is thrilled that her Mom is losing weight (16lbs in 7 weeks) and even though we don't work out together (she lives in a neighboring town and too far away) I drive down and pick her up every week and we go to our meeting!

We keep each other motivated by phone and email and it's like a competition on who will lose the most weight each week that SHE is winning believe it or not so far!

Having a Weight Loss Buddy really makes it more fun and enjoyable. And I encourage anyone to find one if they can. And your buddy can be the most unlikely person that you would have never guessed!
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Old 02-23-2009, 09:43 AM   #15
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That is the type of support I'd LIKE. But, maybe this is something that I need to do on my own. I believe that the universe, God, whatever is at work here, sends me lessons to learn. I've had many different lessons. This might be one and I need to work it out. I'll be here to find support, for sure. I'm off to a good start this morning...5 mins RB (good for cellulite),20 min HIIT, 5 min crunches. Egg white and veggie omelette with LF string cheese, 1 slice high fiber whole wheat toast and 1/2 svg of almonds. I won't be able to eat again until 2ish so this needs to sustain me. Thanks for all your words.
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