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Old 10-16-2008, 08:33 PM   #1
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Default How far Have You Come? (not just lbs or inches)

But in attitude and outlook?

If I were to look back at some of my very first posts, I think I would be embarrassed (not to say I won't probably will embarrass myself again any minute now ). I find it hard to believe that the person who started out (what seems like yesterday and eons ago at the same time) as such a whining excuse maker was really me. I've read a couple of posts today that really made me take a look at, not just the old me eating habits, but the old me attitude too. Kaplods and her amazing "in it for the long haul" outlook despite the other physical challenges she's dealing with, and PhotoChick recalling how she had to "eliminate the word can't" from her vocabulary to name the two that stick out in my mind right now.

I seem to have gone through several phases (lane changes?) along the road to better health but, all in all:

I've (finally) figured out that excuses are not reasons, and gone from making excuses - not just about eating or exercising but in a lot of other areas in my life too - to recognizing them for what they are and squashing them before they get said out loud.

From someone who couldn't trust herself with *snack* food (chips, cookies, ice cream, etc.) in the house at all, to someone who already bought Halloween candy because there simply is no fear of it disappearing (several times over) before the 31st (as long as I keep it hidden from DH ) I just have things I'd rather eat than candy now.

From someone who barely bothered to look in the mirror when getting dressed in the morning to someone who wears makeup, curls her hair, and uses hairspray EVERY DAY - even just for a trip to the grocery store (this is huge for me because, more than once, the old me went to the store in whatever sweats I had slept in the night before ).

From someone who would have used her looming unemployment as an excuse to hide in the dark crying in her beer over how no one was going to hire her anyway so there was no point in even applying; to someone who is still 2 months away from the doors closing but has already updated, and distributed her resume (and is secretly more worried about having to change travel plans for the holidays if she gets hired before the end of the year than she is about not finding a job )

(of course) I didn't see it at the time, but I was the sort of person I look at now and feel badly for them that their lives are so miserable. I was the person that most people would look at and think "what a filthy, fat, lazy, slob". Now I'm the person that women approach in the mall and ask what store I got my handbag or shoes from (which both tickles and flabbergasts me at the same time).

I know there was a thread a while back about whether the members who had lost a good deal of weight thought they were different people. As I recall, most said their lives had indeed changed in many ways but they were still basically the same person. I don't think I am the same person at all - I mean, my basic morals, (and warped sense of humor) haven't changed, but every thing else sure seems to have.

Anyone else done complete U-turns?
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Old 10-16-2008, 08:51 PM   #2
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I have gone from:

-A wife who sent her husband upstairs for every little thing, to a woman who bounds upstairs and gets it her own damned self!

-Someone seemingly without self control, to one who hasn't strayed from her course of actions since making a complete u-turn. In turn I've come to discover and admire my inner strength.

-Someone who was utterly embarrassed of herself to one who struts down the street, walking tall - shoulders pulled back.

-Someone who read success stories enviously, believing it was impossible to one who now inspires others.

-The morbidly obese neighbor of the gym owners, to the biggest success story the gym has ever had.

-Someone who couldn't tie her own shoes without hefting her leg up on a chair to doing weighted squats, walking lunges - enjoying every minute and secretly admiring her quads when no one is looking

-Someone in the drive through at McDonald's to someone who drives on by without a second glance or thought on the way to the gym.

-Someone who ate, and ate and ate nonsensical junk to someone who now realizes food is only fuel for the muscles, the body, the brain. No interest in junk. No more emotional eating.

-Someone who previously thought the biggest benefit of losing weight was to lose pounds/get skinny to someone who cares about health, nutrition, muscle mass, strength and developing her body.

Oh, it goes on and on and on. The biggest change is how empowered I am these days, I've come a long way babies!

Great thread!

Last edited by FB; 10-16-2008 at 09:02 PM.
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Old 10-16-2008, 09:33 PM   #3
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This is great and deserves some thought - thank you for starting the thread.
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Old 10-16-2008, 10:08 PM   #4
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The biggest thing I've come to understand is - You eat to live, you don't live to eat.
Eating used to give me a sick joy. It was my drug of choice.
This site has been crucial in my journey so far. This is one of the only places I can come for support, and say exactly how I'm feeling about myself. I honestly don't know what I would do without this site and it's great people.
Tonight I jogged a little more then half of the track (which is huge). I was so proud. Because the friend I was with said "fatties can't run". She's big aswell, weighs like 215lbs and shes 5'3". I suggested we try jogging, to change our routine up a bit, and she just laughed and said "fatties can't run". I said, well, lets try!. So we did. She lasted maybe 20 feet. I whooped her @$$, and I'm a lot heavier than her!. I felt good.
Never did I ever think I'd be jogging that track. I remember the first time I went there, I hardly walked around it ONCE. It was hard. I've accomplished a lot in a few months.
I've never felt better about myself. And I'm really loving it. I'm learning so much about ME.
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Old 10-17-2008, 03:19 AM   #5
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Oh my gosh, FB, I thought I was the only person who sent significant other upstairs to get stuff for me. I was always embarrassed when I did it, but I guess my laziness trumped my pride. Don't get me wrong, I'm still lazy, but I'm a lazy person who moves more, so it's a start.

The biggest change for me is that I don't think about food all the time -- I eat mindfully, and I don't miss all the calories I was pumping into my body. I used to say I would never diet because I would miss all the foods I used to love, but last night I got totally full off of 160 calories' worth of delicious, fresh, homemade asparagus frittata. I enjoyed it way more than all those fatty, greasy taqueria delights I was trying to defend. I'm not just not missing out on anything -- I'm experiencing more, and am so glad I'm doing this now while I have decades ahead of me to be grateful for how much my life has opened up.

(Also, don't tell anyone, but now that I'm losing weight, I sometimes initiate sex with my bf just to burn some extra calories... just kidding... but it doesn't hurt...)
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Old 10-17-2008, 11:31 AM   #6
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Originally Posted by rubbytummy View Post
(Also, don't tell anyone, but now that I'm losing weight, I sometimes initiate sex with my bf just to burn some extra calories... just kidding... but it doesn't hurt...)
hehehe - If you go look at FitDay's activities section it'll tell you just how many calories you are burning (even broken down into "levels" of, um, participation?) Which brings to mind the other U-turn - I've gone from the person who used to pretend to have already fallen asleep to the person who flounces out of the shower with no robe on and....pounces Let's just say, DH is reaping the rewards of having been so supportive

This whole introspective thinking thing I've been doing the last day or so has given me a rather large new appreciation for DH as well. He hung in there with me when I was the icky, blob - still asking me to come with him to business/social functions and telling me how nice I looked "all dressed up" in my sequined tent. He never once acted embarrassed to be seen with me - even those times I lumbered into the grocery store with my barely combed hair pulled into a ponytail and wearing the wrinkled, slept in sweats - he always held my hand in public and never failed to be affectionate. 'scuse me for a sec. (mistyeyed) I gotta call him and tell him I love him (sniff)
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Old 10-17-2008, 12:31 PM   #7
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Originally Posted by yoyodieterinvegas View Post
hehehe - If you go look at FitDay's activities section it'll tell you just how many calories you are burning (even broken down into "levels" of, um, participation?) Which brings to mind the other U-turn - I've gone from the person who used to pretend to have already fallen asleep to the person who flounces out of the shower with no robe on and....pounces Let's just say, DH is reaping the rewards of having been so supportive

This whole introspective thinking thing I've been doing the last day or so has given me a rather large new appreciation for DH as well. He hung in there with me when I was the icky, blob - still asking me to come with him to business/social functions and telling me how nice I looked "all dressed up" in my sequined tent. He never once acted embarrassed to be seen with me - even those times I lumbered into the grocery store with my barely combed hair pulled into a ponytail and wearing the wrinkled, slept in sweats - he always held my hand in public and never failed to be affectionate. 'scuse me for a sec. (mistyeyed) I gotta call him and tell him I love him (sniff)
My husband didn't know me at my heighest weight, and when we came back to WA before he deployed I was showing him pictures of me from back then. He's so sweet, the only thing he said was, "You were still beautiful." I guess I was half expecting him to say "ewww" and run and hide or something, haha.

What's changed... well, my portion sizes have definately changed. When I look at something, like a bowl of spaghetti, I can tell what's going to fill me up even if it doesn't "look" like alot. I'm more intuned with my fullness, I guess, lol. I don't know how else to put it.

I wear heels now! I would have never in a million years worn heels before.
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Old 10-17-2008, 12:38 PM   #8
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My husband didn't know me at my heighest weight, and when we came back to WA before he deployed I was showing him pictures of me from back then. He's so sweet, the only thing he said was, "You were still beautiful." I guess I was half expecting him to say "ewww" and run and hide or something, haha.

I wear heels now! I would have never in a million years worn heels before.

Awww. Sounds like you and I managed to find a couple of the good ones

Oh, yeah! Love those heels! I've got some that put me right at 6ft tall - makes me feel downright elegant.
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Old 10-17-2008, 03:01 PM   #9
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I'm afraid I'm turning in to a shopaholic. It is such a thrill to go into a store and pick something that I'm sure is too small, take it in the dressing room and it fits! I love the heels too. I can wear them without wincing in pain. Before, I would buy clothes to try to hide my size and try to look nice. Now I really feel like I do look nice. I can't wait until I feel like I belong in the regular size section of the store. I'm still afraid someone will point me to the plus size area.
I can run up the front steps into my house. My knees used to hurt so bad when I had to climb stairs. I can sit on the ground and get up without embarrassing myself. I have a great hubby too, who has always loved me, but now he looks at me a little differently and I like it
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Old 10-17-2008, 03:07 PM   #10
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What a great question, Yo. I've enjoyed reading all of the answers. For me, I have changed how I view food. I am not perfect, but the majority of my food choices support health (and taste good too!). I'm most astonished at how my exercise has changed. I love lifting weight and pushing myself with running and lifting. I even got on a bike! I have unleashed my inner athlete at the ripe old age of 35! How many people can say they are in the best shape of their lives at 35 or older?
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Old 10-17-2008, 04:43 PM   #11
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I have unleashed my inner athlete at the ripe old age of 35! How many people can say they are in the best shape of their lives at 35 or older?
(raises hand) Here's to "or older" and still getting in even better shape.
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Old 10-17-2008, 04:54 PM   #12
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I have unleashed my inner athlete at the ripe old age of 35! How many people can say they are in the best shape of their lives at 35 or older?
Watch me! here I come!. I will be 34 next month and my wish for my 35th birthday is to be just like you . Not sure about the biking but definitely the best shape of my life part
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Old 10-17-2008, 07:42 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by yoyodieterinvegas View Post
I know there was a thread a while back about whether the members who had lost a good deal of weight thought they were different people. As I recall, most said their lives had indeed changed in many ways but they were still basically the same person. I don't think I am the same person at all - I mean, my basic morals, (and warped sense of humor) haven't changed, but every thing else sure seems to have.

Anyone else done complete U-turns?
I was never shy and I'm still not. My sense of humor prolly hasn't changed either... But I NEVER liked physical activity...I remember a trip to Yosemite where DH and I went for a bike ride with stepson...they were riding faster than me and I got frustrated and started crying. DH remembers the day very clearly as well. To his credit he hasn't once burst into tears because he can't keep up with me. Come to think of it, I used to cry a LOT more. It was monthly...it has been ages since I had a good cry.

My food choices haven't made a complete U turn...but the choices are conscious now. That is a BIG change.
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Old 10-17-2008, 09:02 PM   #14
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I have unleashed my inner athlete at the ripe old age of 35! How many people can say they are in the best shape of their lives at 35 or older?
I can!! 38 years young
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Old 10-18-2008, 02:07 AM   #15
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I think the biggest change for me has been accountability. Accountability to myself. Whenever I'm tempted to binge on something I'll have that initial fleeting thought of "oh, I just won't record it" (in my points) but immediately comes the louder voice that says "the scale won't lie". I'm worth more than that.

I like one of the signatures here, the one that says "Dieting is hard. Maintenance is hard. Being fat is hard. Pick your hard." That is so true! Now I'm just picking a different kind of hard.

My husband has never known the thin me, he loves me for who I am and thinks I'm beautiful the way I am. I want to feel better, look better, and show him that I can be pretty damn sexy.

I'm 33 now. Up until I was 19 I was on the thin side, 110 lbs max. Then I gained 100 lbs from Depo Provera. That's why I gained the weight, and in my mind it changed the way my body worked and that's why I kept it on. Now it has been eye-opening for me to realize that no, there wasn't an underlying medical/hormonal cause, I've just stayed overweight because I eat too much and don't exercise enough.

There are times when I look back and feel that I have "wasted" my 20s being fat. I don't want to look back on my 30s and feel the same way. I want to have photos of this time that I enjoy looking at, instead of hiding from the camera. It's time to step into the frame.
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