You're right, emj--a lot of folks have a relationship with food that tries to get from food something it's not supposed to provide--but it seems to--and it feels good--only, if it really could provide comfort, people wouldn't have to keep on overeating. And then here we are, on 3FC, trying to change that!

Good for you for realizing this. Now don't you go cross posting anymore...

Jay

Emj, thank you for sharing

You're both absolutely right... rationally I know that, and I agree wholeheartedly. But there is a part of me, I don't know what it is - some emotionally unsatisfied part? - that wonders if there is anything that CAN meet whatever need food meets? Yes, food meets those needs temporarily. And yes, it's often very unhealthy. And yes, it tends to (in my case) cause weight gain, which is not only unhealthy but makes you feel awful in countless ways. And yes, the process of reversing the weight gain is oftentimes enduring and even then sometimes you may not be able to reverse the process entirely (stretch marks, lost time, etc.) . So it sounds insane of me to say: well.. but.. is anything else going to do it? But here I am, asking it... does anything else do it?

Maybe I'm just having a rough time.. but since the subject came up, I wanted to bring this up. And rationally, I KNOW food should be used as fuel, but that small part of me feels unsure

beautifulone, I think heroin addicts feel the same way about heroin. And alcoholics about alcohol, and so on. Trying to get "that feeling"--basically an artificial high--is a trap. It is a trap that will keep people obese.

Part of the "lifestyle change" is to give up pursuing "that feeling." It's amazing how many other feelings are possible once one gives up substance abuse--and I don't think that phrase is too strong! Feelings like true contentment, peace, calm, relaxation, serenity. And also other less comfortable feelings--but life is about those as well, and what we do with them.

That's what I think.

Jay

Beautifulone, I think Jay is definitely right.

I have also found that instead of looking for that feeling of pleasure that I get from food, I look for it elsewhere.

And believe it or not, feeling thin and confident and healthy and fitting into beautiful clothing and all the incredible, mindblowing (for me anyway), benefits of being fit and trim, well those things actually feel better then any of the food ever tasted. I know it's hard to believe, but it IS the truth.

That is awesome. It really puts YOU in control.

I was just thinking last night at dinner. We had friends over for homemade pizza. I had a slice of pizza, a slice of garlic bread, salad, and sweet potatoes. All of which fit in my calorie limit for the day. And even though I was satisfied... slightly on the full side, I was sooo tempted to get another slice of pizza. Then I thought... there will be pizza left over I can have a slice after my workout tomorrow afternoon. I usually don't have carbs at night but that was a special occasion; I'm glad I didn't make things worse by stuffing my face with another slice last night. Now I can enjoy one after a workout when my body will be better able to use the carbs instead of storing them as fat.

It's so easy to give into temptation. Those split second decisions are what keep us from reaching our goals.

Jay, I think I'm going to print this out and put it somewhere where I can see it. Or read it daily, or SOMETHING. I think the consistent reminder will serve me well.

Robin, your enthusiasm is so catchy

You and Jay are right, of course. And I agree with you guys. It's just so damn difficult sometimes to put that wisdom into practice - but that doesn't mean it's impossible or to be ignored, just challenging I guess. It's such a vicious cycle.. not only tastebud adjustment but you eat more, so you gain weight, so you eat more out of depression, so you gain weight, so you (for me anyways) start to feel inhibited from doing things that would help you actually fulfill those needs, so you substitute that with food, so you gain more weight, and on... Agh. I just wanted to get that out. It's time for change... thank you for your comments

Oh yes Beautifulone, is IS difficult to put those things to practice. But just think how hard it is to be overweight. Is it really, really all that more difficult?

You must find other things initially to take the place of food. Do a jigsaw puzzle, journal, read a magazine, clean up a closet, knit, sew, talk on the phone, do your nails, WHATEVER it is. Make the decison, make the commitment to do this. You won't regret it, not for a single second. I don't think you will be able to say that if you DON'T do this.


And although those things may be hard to put into play, once you start doing them and they become HABIT and you start reaping the benefits, they DO become easier. Because of course what at first seems difficult, actually becomes ENJOYABLE and you'll actually WANT to do it.

I know for me, the first 2 weeks, probably more like 10 days were very difficult. But then after that it got much easier.

You need to stick to your plan (and yes, you need one) like GLUE, like GLUE. Don't make it an option NOT to for that initial period. And then really, it does get easier. The cravings will practically cease. You'll be feeling better. You'll be in a groove. And you'll be well on your way to creating a healthier & better life for yourself. No more settling for second best, when first is well within your reach. Losing weight IS a doable thing, and you too CAN do it. And you should. Because you deserve this. You really, really do.