I was asked that once. I replied something along the lines of, "I'm not." The woman was an acquaintance and boy was she mortified. I think that the dress I was wearing at the time was not the most flattering, but you'd think someone who knew me somewhat would realize that it was fat not a pregnancy.
Some women you can tell without a doubt, some not. If it isn't blindingly obvious I don't say anything. Actually, I usually only say something if I know the person (which means it's usually common knowledge.)
I've never been asked, but one Christmas my parents came down for the holidays and my father kept staring at my stomach with a judgemental look on his face (I'm single) the entire week. I could tell what he was thinking and it looked like he was going to ask a couple of times. Even though he never did, I was still mortified.
I don't ever ask either. One - for the obvious but also I've had several friends who have miscarried or can't get pregnant and you just never know what place they're in. I think the whole subject is taboo unless the person brings it up.
Actually, there was a lady that works at the same place as I do and a co-worker and I were trying to decide if she was pregnant for the longest time a few years ago. Finally I noticed her reaching for something off a shelf and saw the tummy panel on her jeans. Amazingly enough she was out on maternity leave within a month or two!
oh man, I've never been asked that question thank god! I think it's b/c I'm so tall that my torso just doesn't shape into the pregnant belly thing. I just carry lots of weight everywhere!
Although, on the negative side, when I *DO* get pregnant, I don't think people will be able to tell so much b/c I am so tall. I want a big ol' crazy preggie belly... but I think I have too much room in my body cavity and doubt I'll get much more than a little pouch.
Ah well. At least I can then pretend that the stretch marks on my belly are TOTALLY due to the baby, right?
I have been guilty of committing this crime. AND believe me, I was horrified both times. I did this twice. The first time, I said to myself "self, I will NEVER do that again"...well after about 10 years I guess I forgot that conversation with myself and actually committed this horrible foot in mouth crime again not too long ago. I am an RN in a neonatal ICU, we attend high risk deliveries and I went to a delivery and was taking the baby to the nursery. I stopped with the dad to show the other family in the hallway the new baby. One of his sisters looked 7-8 months pregnant. She was slim everywhere except that pregnancy looking torso. Now mind you, I see women pregnant every day, I see them in all stages of pregnancy as most of our patients (babies) are born prematurely. She laughed with me and said she was not pregnant but hadn't lost her weight from her babies yet...I only hope she wasn't hurt. I certainly did not mean to hurt her.
The first time I made the error, about 10 years ago now, I was also working and was coming into work for the day. I met up with another nurse who used to work in our unit but worked on another floor at that time. She had been so slender the last time I saw her. She had gotten married about 3-4 years prior and she had just gained weight, but I didn't know this and she was carrying her weight like she was pregnant. I made a terrible assumption that she was pregnant. I was horrified, she said don't worry about it, others have asked the same thing. Again...I never meant to hurt her and I hope it did not hurt her. I KNOW she was annoyed. So, once again, I have had a repeat conversation with myself. I hope to never again ask someone something that is potentially hurtful. I did apologize both times.
I doubt that anyone who asks this has any intent to be hurtful.
One of the main reasons I won't wear any high-waisted dresses is that I carry all my excess weight in my stomach area and I just know people will think I'm 8-9 months along. It's also why I'm trying so hard to lose it!
i have not personally had this happen, but my little sister has, only she was 9 when she got her first accusation of pregnancy. Seriously people. She was 9...and she cried. i hope she made them feel terrible for asking that....i almost feel like the way that they asked her it was an attempt to make her realize what she looked like....DUMB.
